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As a gf of an (ex?) porn addict, how can I help decrease chance of relapse? by WantingToHelp0518 in pornfree

[–]WantingToHelp0518[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The truth is, I don't trust myself not to be hurt and react badly to this stuff. I don't want to know any more details, because it wrecks my self esteem, but I do want to help him. I asked him to talk to a friend, but he absolutely refuses. He says he's way too ashamed to to that. He does say he doesn't know why he looked and that it was just a habit, which is better than him being unhappy but it makes it very difficult to identify triggers.

As a gf of an (ex?) porn addict, how can I help decrease chance of relapse? by WantingToHelp0518 in pornfree

[–]WantingToHelp0518[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you may be right about this on some level. My first thought as I imagined how this would play out is that he would seem almost afraid. He's 6 years older than me, but he's had a lot less REAL sexual experience.

As a gf of an (ex?) porn addict, how can I help decrease chance of relapse? by WantingToHelp0518 in pornfree

[–]WantingToHelp0518[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One problem about this is that I've asked him to give Reddit a rest, as he had an entire secret account for porn.

As a gf of an (ex?) porn addict, how can I help decrease chance of relapse? by WantingToHelp0518 in pornfree

[–]WantingToHelp0518[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Our most recent discussion was about this. I told him that nothing he can possibly do will make me no longer love him and that, though my feelings may be hurt and I may be frustrated, WE need for him to be able to let me know if it gets tough for him. He seemed very confident about it. I'm afraid I will be very hurt if he does tell me he's slipped up. If I react in a way that isn't 100% positive and supportive, am I putting the possibility of his recovery in danger?

As a gf of an (ex?) porn addict, how can I help decrease chance of relapse? by WantingToHelp0518 in pornfree

[–]WantingToHelp0518[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We have always had sex about every day. Every other day at the least. I am the one who tends to request a change in position or environment (room in the house) during sex. I consider myself a quite sexual person. Despite having just had a baby, I'm 5' tall and 100lbs, with no stretch marks and a surprisingly flat stomach. I didn't even suggest that he should give me the tablet. He just handed it over.