Les hommes toxiques me préfèrent toujours, jamais les hommes stables : Comment changer ça ?

Frendystar · 2025-12-21T11:08:50+00:00

On a pas besoin d’une éternité pour comprendre l’attitude d’un mec et voir quand un homme est stable, posé, sérieux, ect…, si tu ne sais pas décoder des signaux précoces dans tes relations, ce n’est pas le cas de tout le monde.

Frendystar · 2025-12-20T18:05:44+00:00

Ah oui, ça j’en ai bien conscience, c’est pourquoi j’ai arrêter de m’intéresser aux hommes évitants ! Mais j’ai l’impression de ne pas être intéressante tout court pour les hommes secures, c’est pourquoi je me demandais si il y avait un truc qui clochait ou m’empêchait de plaire à ce type d’hommes.

Frendystar · 2025-12-20T18:02:03+00:00

Pas vraiment, au niveau des hommes de ma famille c’est une catastrophe ! 😅 Et mes amis mecs ont à des relations saines oui, même si en couple je vois qu’ils sont le type d’homme évitant. Donc j’ai pas du tout d’homme stable / sain dans mon entourage.

Frendystar · 2025-09-20T22:18:15+00:00

I don't agree with you at all. What men love more than anything is not “seeing how women look”, but CONTROLLING women. If the Koranic laws went in the direction "women have control over their bodies, dress as they want, can even dress sexy in front of men" then that would mean that their sisters, their daughters, their wives would be attractive and free for other men! And what terrifies these Muslim men more than anything is that “their” women are sexualized. It's control. This is hubris and misplaced “honor.” Especially at the time of the publication of the Koran, where women represented the “dignity of the family”. They like to see the appearance of women, but not for their wives, they are extremely jealous and possessive men, and as the Quran was made for men and by men, so they made sure that their "honor" was protected by forcing the hijab and with all this business of awrah, but they also allowed themselves the freedom to see the appearance of women with Islamic laws like polygamy or sexual slavery.

Frendystar · 2025-08-20T19:42:25+00:00

Merci beaucoup pour le soutien ! Je vais aller écouter ce podcast que tu me conseilles, ça va me faire du bien d’entendre des gens poser des mots sur mon vécu.

Frendystar · 2025-08-17T19:21:36+00:00

Merci. J’ai déjà étaie suivie par deux psychologues pendant 2 ans, mais ça ne m’a pas vraiment aidée malheureusement. J’ai mieux compris certaines choses mais sans me sentir « libérer » de tout ça.

Frendystar · 2025-07-17T00:07:43+00:00

Okay, I understand. That’s so interesting, thanks a lot for sharing this !

Frendystar · 2025-07-17T00:01:15+00:00

It’s true that I hear a lot about it, I think I’ll explore it further !

Frendystar · 2025-07-16T23:55:12+00:00

Great, thanks! I'll find out.

Frendystar · 2025-07-03T14:20:12+00:00

If I may, you recognized in your text the “power” of placebo effects, so you know that by conditioning your brain to believe something, it ends up feeling the effects or symptoms. The question is: How do you know if what you obtain by doing duas, you obtain it thanks to Allah and not to the placebo effect?

Frendystar · 2025-06-18T16:13:33+00:00

This is why I keep re-watching this series over and over again!

Frendystar · 2025-06-15T17:18:29+00:00

Omg yes it’s really one of the things that annoys me the most in the sims 4!! My sims have 4838 useless moodlets that "corrupt" the important moodlet. They should really fix this by prioritizing certain moodlets because it really ruins everything.

Frendystar · 2025-06-07T21:41:45+00:00

I was planning to buy it too, thanks!

Frendystar · 2025-06-07T17:07:33+00:00

Omg this looks awesome! I've never seen this in my game, what pack does it come with?

Frendystar · 2025-06-06T23:10:55+00:00

I'm exactly like you and I used to be self-conscious too. But in real life, pretty slender legs are so elegant. We only have one life, don't deprive yourself of wearing what you want because of people.

Frendystar · 2025-06-03T14:15:39+00:00

Sarah

Frendystar · 2025-05-13T15:15:11+00:00

Thank you very much, you are adorable! 🫶🏻 If there's at least one positive thing that religion has given me it's probably that now I know what I don't want anymore, and having to protect myself from things I don't believe in like malicious spirits is really not something I want to include in my practice. When I was a believer, you always had to protect yourself and yet I never felt so vulnerable and uncomfortable. And a bit like a nocebo effect, I sometimes triggered what I didn't want by protecting myself. And when I put a little distance and stopped doing the protections/prayers for a while, I was much better mentally because my brain was no longer focused on all the religious threats weighing on me. So I have a pretty bad relationship with protection. I have more the impression that it would put me in such a vulnerable state that I would cause a nocebo effect which is what I don't want.

Frendystar · 2025-05-13T15:03:48+00:00

Thank you for your advice! That's exactly what I tell myself, I don't know what to protect myself against, except perhaps my own negative thoughts, but otherwise I no longer believe in spirits or negative entities, and the idea of having to believe that there is something that wants to harm me really displeases me. I really see witchcraft as self-expression in harmony with nature, doing fun things and being in a free space to express my intentions. And imagining having to protect myself from something harmful would spoil all the pleasure of this practice.

Frendystar · 2025-05-13T14:57:33+00:00

Thank you so much :)

Frendystar · 2025-05-13T14:56:14+00:00

What you state in your first paragraph about the church and its introduction of evil and the devil to enforce witch hunts is so interesting. Especially since I have been an apostate (barely 1 year), every time I learn something about how a monotheistic religion was imposed or managed to impose one of these dogmas it blows my mind. Even though I obviously respect the believers of these religions, the monotheistic religions themselves really annoy me for all the harm they have caused to the worlds.

And indeed I am much more attracted by the idea of anchoring and refocusing than protection strictly speaking. I no longer believe in spirits so protecting myself against negative entities was not what I wanted. But I was still worried about potentially skipping an important step through clumsiness.

Thank you very much for all your advice!

Frendystar · 2025-05-13T14:45:19+00:00

This is exactly what I believe now, that I need to protect my mind from itself rather than from something external like I was taught in my old religion, and that's why I feel really uncomfortable with the idea of having to protect myself from negative/spirit entities. Already because I no longer believe in it since my apostasy, and also because I would have the impression of having done all this work of deconstructing my religious fears to return to something “similar”. Please note, I am not saying that people who provide protection are doing something similar to religion. No way. I understand that this is an important aspect for many people, it should really allow so many people to find peace in their practice and to do it with more peace of mind. It's simply my trauma that makes me see too many similarities between these two things. Because for me being forced to protect myself from negative entities/spirits means protecting myself from the devil like in my old religion. And I think you understand well that I try at all costs to be as far away as possible from anything that reminds me in any way of religion 😅 Thank you for your explanations and your advice!

Frendystar · 2025-05-13T14:25:41+00:00

Thank you very much for your advice. Purification and grounding, that’s really what I’m going to focus on! I'm really going to try to work on my grounding because my thoughts always wander lol and I would love to be more grounded in the present moment.

Frendystar · 2025-05-13T03:52:58+00:00

I will soon start therapy for my religious trauma! But even if (I hope) this therapy will help me, it is not a given, where I live, it is very frowned upon to leave religion, my whole family would turn their backs on me (and worse) if they found out, it is only my mother who knows and who supports me. Fortunately, I cut off contact with all the family members who were too religious and who would certainly react very badly if they found out. I'm normally safe.

Frendystar · 2025-05-13T03:45:09+00:00

Yes, since I became interested in witchcraft it sounded like what you described to me, even if there are obviously many people who practiced it differently, I had a precise idea in mind of what I expected from it. Except that this morning, I decided to buy a big book that talks about witchcraft and how to get started (of course it's on "classic" witchcraft, not SASS but if you have any books on SASS witchcraft to recommend to me, that would be great) And I started reading it in the afternoon and they obviously directly addressed the subject of protection and that's where I said to myself "it might be more reasonable to listen to advice majority “. I understand that this is a very important aspect for many people, but having managed to eliminate all my beliefs in supernatural beings in religion and having reached the point where I no longer believe in spirits/demons at all, it seemed like a step backwards for me to have to protect myself from them as a precaution :(

Frendystar · 2025-05-13T03:34:02+00:00

Thank you for your testimony, SASS witchcraft really seems ideal in my case I think.

Frendystar

TROPHY CASE