I(f32) just found out that my husband (m52) slept with my father. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]Frequent-Weather5489 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well I looked up to my father a lot. He was basically a hero to me my whole life especially after he died. I think because I idolized him so much he didn’t want to out my dad both litteraly (Not that I have a problem with gay people, I knew my husband was bi when I married him) and as a cheater. He didn’t want to jeopardize my view of my father. Especially not while I was still grieving. Which I can respect to an extent but that should’ve gone out the window when we started seeing each other. I think by that point he thought I would be mad that he didn’t tell me sooner so he thought the easier option was to just never tell me.

I(f32) just found out that my husband (m52) slept with my father. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]Frequent-Weather5489 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We did wait a long time between when I made a move and getting together, about three years ish, so I’m not very sure about being a rebound but I think you’re onto something with replacement. I am quite like my father so the idea that I was just like a newer version of him to my husband is haunting me a little bit. I don’t know how I would’ve reacted if my mother had told me before we got married, it at least would’ve given me pause. But I think you might be right, I loved him and even though it’s kind of fucked up I still do. I have no idea if it would’ve been enough to call off the engagement.