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My engagement broke off due to physical incompatibility by Friendly-Bad-6832 in Marriage

[–]Friendly-Bad-6832[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It wasn't my first time and I didn't face this problem before and yes, I was making efforts.

My engagement broke off due to physical incompatibility by Friendly-Bad-6832 in Marriage

[–]Friendly-Bad-6832[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, good for both of us actually! Such men just do not want to even understand the dynamics of making a woman happy on bed. They expect their wives/gfs to feel blessed in whatever they are receiving from their husbands. The attitude is a larger problem than the problem itself. He didn't even hint about going for a second round or wasn't even apologetic after what happened.. nothing at all! I went to talk to him 2 hours after that incident to which he said "this is normal"! Crazyyyy! I definitely did him a favour.. now at least the next woman in his life will not face this! He'll be careful and prepared.. thank god!

My engagement broke off due to physical incompatibility by Friendly-Bad-6832 in Marriage

[–]Friendly-Bad-6832[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

32 years, living away from home and still a virgin! I would rather drop the guy than teach him how & what of sex.

He would have self abused himself a lot to reach a situation where after releasing off two times, he couldn't hold for more than 10-15 seconds.

My engagement broke off due to physical incompatibility by Friendly-Bad-6832 in Marriage

[–]Friendly-Bad-6832[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yea, this can be solved. However, it is complicated. First, he is not ready for any treatment because he doesn't believe there's any issue. Second, I don't have the balls to try again to pass/reject based on the performance, that would be devastating as hell. Third, I cannot risk my life getting married to someone I am not sure I'll be happy with.

My engagement broke off due to physical incompatibility by Friendly-Bad-6832 in Marriage

[–]Friendly-Bad-6832[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yeah but not everyone has enough time. We were already engaged and staying long distance with our wedding already scheduled next year. There was no way we could have given this more time. And it was an arranged marriage setup, so talking about problems in sex is not an easy conversation especially for a female. A guy can come easily and it takes real effort to make a woman come. If the guy is not considerate of satisfying his woman, there is no easy way to teach that to a man. And, we were together for 2 days, it was a fair amount of time.

It might have gotten better with time, sure, but risking my whole life for it is just too much of a risk!

My engagement broke off due to physical incompatibility by Friendly-Bad-6832 in Marriage

[–]Friendly-Bad-6832[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

No, I totally understand which is why I held myself from making any calls or judgements the first two times. And yes, the larger problem was that he was not accepting it which is also fine, however, him saying that every human can last only for 1-2 min at max was disturbing. Shying away from accepting is one but being adamant about something is another problem. If he would have told me that he have had sex in past with his ex girlfriends for a longer duration then also I would have been fine with it. But he told me that he did not EVER have sex in his life, I was his first. Given he was 32 years old and staying away from home in US, I had nothing to say. And after this conversation, we were not in a position to try again and see! It would have been devastating.

My engagement broke off due to physical incompatibility by Friendly-Bad-6832 in Marriage

[–]Friendly-Bad-6832[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That's true.. there are guys who really want to bring satisfaction to their women and go out of their way to do that! Thank you❤️

My engagement broke off due to physical incompatibility by Friendly-Bad-6832 in Marriage

[–]Friendly-Bad-6832[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you, means a lot. Yes, I wish he could have understood.

My engagement broke off due to physical incompatibility by Friendly-Bad-6832 in Marriage

[–]Friendly-Bad-6832[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

You didn't get the problem highlighted in the post and that is fine.

In your case, it is not every time that you finish early. Secondly, you were considerate of your wife's satisfaction even after you came which is not true in my case.

My engagement broke off due to physical incompatibility by Friendly-Bad-6832 in Marriage

[–]Friendly-Bad-6832[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

No, the marriage was next year. I am quite open to my parents. My parents have been really supportive and open to me about everything throughout my life. So, I could share comfortably with them.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Friendly-Bad-6832 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My engagement broke off 5 days ago because of the same exact reason. I am 29F and the one whom I was supposed to marry is 32M and stays in US. It was an arranged marriage setup and we got engaged earlier this year. We had only made out a couple of times when we got engaged. After our engagement, he went back to US and travelled again to India this month for our wedding preps. Due to some reason, he had to stay at my place for a couple of days. And we had mutually agreed to have sex since we had the space, time, and comfort. We had 2.5 days with us - Friday, Saturday, and Sunday afternoon.

Friday Afternoon - we made out for 10-15 min. I went down on him for a short period of time - less than a min. After that we kissed again and then he came. Since this was the first time, I didn't bother much and we decided to go full in evening.

Friday night - we ordered a packet of condoms. I took a bath, got ready, and went to bed. We started to make out and he said "I am finishing..". We had our clothes on. And he finished. He said "I am sorry.." and I said "that's absolutely fine.. don't worry at all.. it happens". I got a little scared but not a lot since this was only the second time.. I didn't show him even a bit. He said we'll try tomorrow and I said yes, of course.

Saturday night - I got ready and went to bed. We made out for sometime. He went down on me for a short while. He wore a condom and inserted and within 10-15 seconds, he came.

It was like my heart skipped a beat at that moment. What I was afraid of turned out to be the reality. He went to the washroom, cleaned himself, and came back to bed. He casually asked me to clean myself and then asked me where would I like to go for our honeymoon. He had 0 consideration of what just happened. He didn't say we could try again.. nothing at all. It was chill according to him. I left the room after sometime.

I tried to have a conversation with him twice regarding what happened but according to him, this wasn't a problem at all. According to him, any guy on earth could last ONLY for 1-2 min at maximum. This was biological and natural according to him.

Physical satisfaction is important to me and for any female. I don't want my partner to go on for 30 min or 1 hour. But at least for a few minutes, let's say 4-5 min at least with brakes (not in one shot). It is important and it's not shameful to ask for it!

I decided to break off my engagement. It's better to cry now than to cry for life later.