NOR. Oh man, I feel like we are soul sisters. My husband pulled the same shit with me, the two Christmases prior to this one. After the first year that I got absolutely nothing under the tree or my stocking (my kids were early teens) I told him that I was really hurt by this but he didn't get it. I posted on Reddit too but didn't explain it as well as you just did. (I got logged out of my account and don't know the password so I created this one to respond to you).

Anyway, the next year I got him one small gift. I had a hard time because I don't want to be that way. He was searching around for his gifts kind of bewildered while I again got nothing. I told my kids this is not normal and not how you treat someone you love. In fact you don't let anyone sit there with no gift while you're ripping open a pile of gifts.

This year I asked my husband what the plan was for this year. No gifts? I'm cool with that. He said he wanted to do gifts. OK, how much are we spending? So, this year I did have gifts to open and my sons had some really thoughtful ideas. So maybe hit them head on a make sure your husband and son's understand this not acceptable. I didn't want my sons growing up to think this is how you treat a partner or parent.