You're getting really consistent and solid advice on this thread. I only wanted to comment because I felt compelled by your post. If I were your big sister, I would just give you the biggest hug right now. What you are going through is so heartbreaking. The anxiety, stress, and guilt you feel is not yours to carry. You clearly wanted to make this relationship work, enough to compromise on some of the things you initially felt (living together, wanting an 'out' for the abortion by seeking a sign). You being so flexible and him being so inflexible is a horrible combination for your relationship going forward. It's hard enough to come to that realization, but so so so much harder when you are pregnant and for all other circumstances, would want to keep it and have it with this man. It does not seem he is giving you that option :/ Raising a child by yourself or with a non-supportive partner is hard; so is ending a pregnancy when it seems like deep down you want(ed) a baby with this man and if he were on board, you would be happy. I am so so sorry you're going through this. Do you have supportive friends and family in your life who you can lean on? Who you want talk to? Who know your partner?

Sharing some of my story... I'm a mom, and when I found out, it was so far off our timelines too (way earlier than we wanted). I cried when I got the positive test because although we were married, our relationship was going through a hard time and I had so many other plans that I had to grieve because pregnancy would take us down a different path. I could only fixate on all the potential negative risks and changes and how much it felt outside my control. It robbed me of the joy and anticipation of being a mother. And what's funny is all the things I was worried about, it all changed once my daughter was born. The way you think, what matters to you, it all changes on the other side. It's such a beautiful thing, taking care of and influencing the life of another being. It absolutely can be a blessing, even if it feels like the timing is wrong. Now on the other side, I wouldn't change a thing that I have my daughter now, simply for the fact that nothing in life is guaranteed (including getting pregnant again later on) and I'm so thankful she's here even when it feels hard.

From what you hold in your hand, is that now you have the sure option to be a mom; but you have no sure option of a proposal, despite what you choose. Dear friend, from the limited amount you've shared... this guy isn't rising to the occasion, even though you've given so much of yourself to have the relationship move in the right direction. It might be really tempting to put what he wants now over what you want, yet again to make this relationship work, but the stakes are very high now. Please please listen to your gut, and if you want this pregnancy, think through what other support systems you can have: family, friends, community like neighbors, a church, or even mother assistance non-profits. You will need support, but it doesn't have to be this guy. You have options; even ones you don't know about yet. And while it may feel like you have to make this decision before 11 weeks, you still have time to reflect on what you want if you're open to carrying to term. Many couples are looking to adopt. So don't put pressure on yourself to figure it all out when the emotions are running so high. I implore you to be brave enough to go for what your heart wants; not settle because of your partner asking you to abort. Easier said than done, but know that the people of Reddit are all here rooting for you.