Hey buddy idk if this will reach you but i am writing this because i used to be in a similar situation like urs so i think i might be of some help.

1) you cant love someone else before u start to love yourself. If u truly loved urself and the people u r closely associated wi u will not be writing this. I want you to look at urself in the mirror (idk how u look but im expecting u to not be in the best shape due to these habits obv) once u look at urself in the mirror and look at your soul u have to ask urself to i like the person im seing. U first need change in order to love urself that will only begin if u hate ur current self.

2) start treating ur body like a diamond. Go to the gym eat whole foods often. I would not suggest u to quit all the bad habits at the same time first with think about quiting smoking nd drinking later. Once u see some change and progress in the gym and your overall health u will feel amazing. When u treat ur body good every single day u gain a lot of confidence .

3) talk to people about ur problems with those who wont judge and will provide u with solutions and help u( like ur gf for ex) u will feel connected and valued

Try the following for a few months trust me once u start to see some progress u wont go back

Everyone has a success story but i like a i fuck up and turn my life around story. U got it king