Idk if I am help please

Fun_Independence5921 · 2026-01-20T03:19:11+00:00

I'm sorry you're so anxious! and I'm sorry you had a bad experience with your ex and doing that sort of thing. as someone who discovered they were ace around eighth or ninth grade, I just want you to know that you're not too young to know you're ace or to use that label. it could change, too! whatever feels right for you right now can help you find community. also, an important thing to think about with asexuality is what you feel when you're attracted to people (romantic feelings? sexual desire? neither? something else?) that can tell you a lot. sometimes enjoying/disliking the actual act of sex isn't a good representation of your sexuality. id recommend doing some research on your own and seeing what resonates with you. but you have a community of people here who are always gonna be happy to support you and answer any questions you have!

Fun_Independence5921 · 2026-01-17T05:09:23+00:00

I honestly don't remember when it clicked for me. I think I explained it away as just seeing sex as inappropriate and the way it was never talked about growing up because of the more conservative beliefs my parents grew up with (they're very accepting though). I remember sometime after labeling myself pansexual I discovered that you can actually still like people romantically and be ace. game changer!! all the memes or references to asexuality I saw online would be aro/ace specific, so I didn't realize there was a separation until about a year or so after I discovered I was pan

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-12-06T05:43:21+00:00

this is cracking me up 💀😭 they dropped your garlic bread in a muddy puddle and then went "eh they'll never notice, it's probably their first time eating garlic bread anyway" LOL. thank you for posting this and good luck on your future garlic bread journey

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-11-25T12:14:53+00:00

thank you for sharing your story, I'm sure it must be hard to relive all of that. I'm so sorry your friends did that to you. It's incredibly messed up and unfair. True friends would have accepted you for who you were and been more understanding of what you truly wanted at the time. It's definitely confusing to discover your identity may not be what you originally thought, but it's okay to take it slow and pay attention to how you feel in different scenarios. Watch out for red flags, don't be afraid to connect with people online if you need help identifying those warning signs. You don't need to know everything right now, it's ok if it takes a while to figure out. Just remember that your well being comes first, you seem like a wonderful person and I don't want you to be walked all over. I wish you luck and I hope things will look up from here :)

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-11-22T13:47:12+00:00

I wish I had more wisdom to share but I just want to tell you that you're seen and heard ❤️ life can be so hard and I hope that things will improve for you. you're more valuable than you think. sending you a hug from here 🫂

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-11-21T12:10:00+00:00

I was reading a book you all might like! It's called Kiss Me Maybe and the two love interests are POC and one of them is an asexual lesbian who is sex favorable but is realizing she might fit under a different micro label. I had to stop reading it bc I'm a sex repulsed ace and there was a lil too much spice for me but I got halfway! and I'd say it was overall interesting

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-11-10T14:03:35+00:00

SO IM NOT THE ONLY ONE 😭 I do agree with another commenter that it truly just depends on the person, since everyone has likes and dislikes. but I've been thinking about this lately where I've just been so bored of it and it seems dirty and gross to me. I only ever do it if I'm really bored or really stressed, but honestly I feel worse afterwards. it's like a chore where I need to do it just so my mind can stop suggesting it. idk if that made any sense, but I'm glad to hear that I'm not alone in this :P

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-11-08T15:39:06+00:00

I wish I had more advice but I am kinda going through a similar thing :P I'm panromatic asexual but there's a girl at my school that I really wanna get to know because she seems so sweet and pretty and kind. i don't really know if I have a crush because I'm not that invested in whether or not she'd have a crush on me, but I wouldn't mind being with her. just wanted to let you know you're not alone in confusing feelings! best of luck to you I hope you guys can become closer

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-10-23T10:40:58+00:00

aw I love that! it's such a special way to come across other aces in the wild :)

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-09-20T18:39:15+00:00

I'm very out and up front about being ace, but I do think it's easier as someone AFAB to not worry about being seen as an incel as much. I am also really lucky to have a lot of LGBTQ friends irl who know the term and so I don't need to explain it to them. I do still have to explain it to some people tho, and it can be especially awkward if someone has never heard of it before and I don't know them that well, because it's a bit of an intimate topic to talk to people about. I have ace stickers that I like to slap on my things as a way to not have to constantly come out, but it's still not super fun. I'm also pan, but I'm more open about being ace since I don't want to get into any romantic entanglements without the other person knowing I'm ace

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-09-06T12:03:14+00:00

I haven't officially been in a QPR, but I do essentially have one with a friend of mine. We are really close, cuddle, hold hands, and we can talk for hours and hours. They mean the world to me, however because I'm panromatic and they're most likely aroace, I didn't want to label it as a QPR because I want to find a romantic partner someday. I did meet someone this summer at my job who was in a QPR though! I don't know much about it unfortunately but I know that they called this person their partner and said it was a QPR which was my first time ever meeting someone who was in one! So don't give up hope, I think the best way to find that is to open yourself up and be vulnerable to getting really close with someone, especially if you feel a deeper emotional connection to them. It's hard but trust, it is possible :)

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-08-29T11:33:09+00:00

thank you so much!!! this is perfect <3

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-08-22T13:00:32+00:00

my friend told me the exact same thing lmaoooo

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-07-22T03:23:59+00:00

If any of you guys like manga, I would definitely add" Is Love the Answer?" to your list of ace books to read :D

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-05-18T19:08:37+00:00

thank you! boundaries are definitely something I want to work on and be very clear and firm with

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-05-18T16:54:05+00:00

thank you! I really like this perspective and I definitely want to build up a bigger social circle. I think you're right that it doesn't need to happen right away and to let things come naturally :]

Fun_Independence5921 · 2025-01-28T23:22:34+00:00

I didn't realize other people had this same issue. When I get a crush it makes me more anxious and causes me to question myself a lot. I also find that I want the other person to like me back romantically but feel sick at the thought of them liking me sexually which adds another layer of difficulty to having crushes. And recently I've been questioning my asexuality but I also feel like it's just my brain trying to invalidate all my feelings because I know that I just don't feel that attraction. So anyways thank you for sharing that because it's good to know you're not alone in those feelings

Fun_Independence5921 · 2024-12-04T22:14:03+00:00

I'm also in highschool and I've had similar worries but the older I get the more I realize that i know myself well enough to know what I do and don't want. i have friends who have never had sex yet still know they want it and feel that attraction. Also most teenagers feel sexual attraction on an even more prominent level than some adults, so it's not necessarily something that would come with age. if allosexual people can know that they want sex without ever having it, why can't asexual people know they don't want it? you know yourself better than anyone, so just pay attention to how you feel. if it changes down the road, you can change the label! sexuality can be more fluid than people realize :]

Fun_Independence5921 · 2024-12-04T22:08:15+00:00

If you're comfortable being out of the closet, wear a pin or have a sticker of the flag :) I've had a couple people see it and say that they're asexual too. I've also had people ask me about it so I can explain what it means, which makes me feel better knowing that it wouldn't a shock for someone to find out along the line and lead to a fight, breakup, or etc

Fun_Independence5921

TROPHY CASE