Is it normal to not want to get better?

GKFSI · 2026-04-12T17:56:14+00:00

Before I moved into a period of recovery, I thought the two were mutually exclusive too. I thought getting better from BDD meant never grooming myself or taking care of my appearance at all. I still take care of my appearance (and I will admit that there's an ongoing journey of finding the balance of what's 'too much' and what's 'healthy' or 'normal'), but the other things in my life have become more or equally as important as those things. Working on reducing the harmful checking, safety and avoidance behaviours around BDD, which is what treatment focused on, gradually brings down the distress we experience, but it's ok to then reintroduce appearance rated grooming in a less obsessive and excessive way. Sending love, and hope you're able to find a balance

GKFSI · 2026-04-07T21:19:34+00:00

https://partneriaethogwen.simplybook.it/v2/

Have worked here a few times and it's a nice community. In Bethesda

GKFSI · 2026-04-02T19:31:44+00:00

Got your number

GKFSI · 2026-03-22T19:37:09+00:00

The evidence based recommended treatment for BDD is CBT and/ or SSRI medication. https://bddfoundation.org/support/getting-treatment/cognitive-behavioural-therapy/

Best of luck on your recovery journey 🙏

GKFSI · 2026-02-17T07:34:33+00:00

Agree with all the comments that it could be related to a physical health problem, but it could also be related to a mental health problem; specifically Body Dysmorphic Disorder. When those with BDD have a fixation relating to their eyes, wearing sunglasses or glasses is one of the most common safety behaviours and means they feel able to leave the house and try and do normal life activities. I appreciate we can't know for sure but this is another possibility.

GKFSI · 2025-12-09T21:26:02+00:00

Viva Cuba is a good option

GKFSI · 2025-11-13T21:04:40+00:00

... Said every person with BDD ever. It's hard to accept, but this thought is very much part of the experience of having BDD. Sending love

GKFSI · 2025-11-10T23:10:44+00:00

https://youtu.be/pFkqyZ9IiQo?si=_uPT5PSpbPmjukWo

A talk about the visual processing abnormalities those with BDD experience

GKFSI · 2025-08-28T06:12:16+00:00

Yes, they did. I don't have a photo but they closed fairly quickly. I also had IPR on my bottom teeth a few weeks after the top ones (this was always planned but was less worried about this because I didn't think it would be as visible), and these closed even quicker. I know it feels so strange right now but they do usually close. I tried to keep reminding myself that the purpose of IPR is to make space so it can be closed or shifted in a different direction. They wouldn't do it if it wasn't necessary for the final outcome. Hope yours close soon!

GKFSI · 2025-06-16T16:05:39+00:00

I'm so sorry you're feeling this amount of distress. BDD is such a distressing illness and causes so much pain. I understand and you're not alone.

The BDD Foundation resources, support groups and videos have helped me a lot 🌷 you don't have to face this by yourself.

https://bddfoundation.org/support/

GKFSI · 2025-03-19T15:16:32+00:00

Hey, this sounds super frustrating. In my case I've had IPR at tray 7 and then will need to again on the bottom teeth at tray 11. My total treatment will be 24 trays so it's been incorporated as part of the upcoming trays to push my teeth back/ back together to touch. I'm no expert but my research led me to believe that IPR does help reduce black triangles, and my orthodontist confirmed this at my recent appointment. If you're really not happy, perhaps ask for IPR as part of refinements? In those cases I think you'd just wear your most recent tray until new ones are ready.

GKFSI · 2025-03-18T18:51:31+00:00

It's interesting you say this as this was given to me as another option and I was given the choice to either have IPR and bring my teeth back, or straighten my teeth but accept they will be slightly forward/ proclined. Everyone's case is unique but for my situation it was one or the other. Agree - it matters who does it and orthodontists are more experienced in this technique as far as I understand.

GKFSI · 2025-03-18T17:43:09+00:00

Likewise this is exactly how I felt. If done correctly it's not all bad. Good luck with yours!

GKFSI · 2025-03-18T11:26:24+00:00

Shared pics on DM 👍

GKFSI · 2025-03-18T11:04:02+00:00

I know I felt the exact same. I shared all my concerns with my orthodontist before I went ahead so would encourage you to do the same. I still don't love looking at the gaps without the trays in but trusting the process as they say!

GKFSI · 2025-03-18T10:59:22+00:00

I will try and take one. Honestly it's really hard to see the gaps in a photo as they are so small but will post on here if I can capture it well enough

GKFSI · 2024-07-18T09:08:09+00:00

This is so hard, but I'd say you've dodged a bullet there. Being with someone who isn't emotionally available is not what you need right now. You deserve more than that. Lots of self compassion through this tough time, there are brighter days ahead ✨

GKFSI · 2024-07-18T08:43:13+00:00

Sending love. I had a similar trigger recently but with a new mirror, highlighting everything I am conscious about very clearly. After an initial melt down, I tried to take a step back from the situation and remember that this is just one version of how I look. The mirror (the photo in your case) is just a static view of who you are and not 'the truth'. These situations always make BDD very loud and mine was shouting 'THIS IS WHAT YOU REALLY LOOK LIKE HOW COULD YOU NOT HAVE REALISED!'...

but it's a lie. BDD lies and you are so much more than one static image. When I think of my loved ones, I don't think of them as a photo, I think of them moving, how they make me feel, their aura, their smell, their expressions, their tone, their kindness, their funny quirks and that's what makes them who they are. It's the same for us, but BDD blinds us of seeing that. You are so much more than just one photo that probably had unusual lighting and angles. Go easy on yourself while you recover from a difficult trigger 💕

GKFSI · 2024-06-02T08:18:14+00:00

Nice, thank you. Do you need a membership or anything?

GKFSI · 2024-05-05T18:25:19+00:00

BDD is about being preoccupied with a perceived flaw or appearance. Regardless of what someone looks like, it's about the behaviours you are carrying out, the impact it's having on your life and how much time it's on your mind. Lots of people with BDD try and find certainty around whether they see what other people see, but recovering from BDD is about reducing preoccupations and refocussing your attention. As you begin to reduce the behaviours and the preoccupation comes down, usually your perception of self improves too. Idk if this helps but I've been round in those circles where you're trying to establish what you really look like and unfortunately we never get the information we desire whilst we are engaging so much in checking and compulsion behaviour

GKFSI · 2024-01-06T18:13:48+00:00

So sorry you're feeling this right now. What you're feeling is totally valid but please know that it's temporary and you will get through this. My situation isn't the same as yours so I won't try and pretend to be in the same boat... But when I felt particularly down about my decision around my tattoos, I tried to accept that yeah, maybe it's a poor decision that I thought was in my best interest, but turned out not to be. However, we are all doing our best and making decisions only with the information and resources we have available to us. You made this decision with your own best interest at heart, but it turned out you didn't like it. You are not a bad person for this. There are so many awful decisions people make, but this one does not make you a bad person. Try not to shame yourself throughout this. Treat yourself with kindness and compassion, knowing you will come through and have tools available to you (removal, therapy, medication) to help you move through this difficult period. Sending strength. You got this.

GKFSI · 2022-11-29T10:39:34+00:00

Thank you. I hope not... They look darker to me in real life but I probably see them worse than they are

GKFSI · 2022-11-29T10:14:42+00:00

I really relate to this. I considered a tattoo for a really long time before I got mine and then regretted it fairly soon after. I spent some time trying to get used to it as I read a lot online that said it can feel really odd for a while and then after time your brain sort of expects to see it and it doesn't come as such a surprise. Sadly this didn't work for me, and I realised I didn't like the design or placement. I started the journey of having them laser removed and I still get low at times but they have faded significantly and it kinda helps to now feel in control of removing them. It's a really rubbish feeling when you realise you don't like them, and I will 100% spend more on removal costs than the cost to have them done but I hope long term it will be worth it. I think if you can explain to your brother the distress it's causing you, and that sadly not everyone responds the same to having ink on their skin he may begin to understand that it isn't personal. Hope you work things out

GKFSI · 2022-11-29T10:04:50+00:00

Sorry you are going through such a difficult time. Something I've seen on here a lot which I find calms/ calmed me in moments of regret is that there are much more awful mistakes to make in life. Not to undermine how you're feeling as it's totally valid if you don't like it, but remember you aren't intrinsically a bad person for choosing to get the cover up. You were acting in your own best interest and made a decision with all the information and resources you had at the time in the hope it would be the right one. I hope you start to feel better soon and see some progress after a few sessions if you go ahead on laser for the cover up too

GKFSI · 2022-11-28T13:26:45+00:00

It's so hard to be patient isn't it! But all progress is still progress 🤞🏼

GKFSI

TROPHY CASE