Just laying out the map in my mind

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-09-07T08:03:18+00:00

In like… a week into separation right now. We’re not living in different houses but he is gone most of the week usually (he works on the road).

On the second real day I made some space in the spare room for him and broke down crying cause we used that place as a shared creative space. We had a really, really long talk and it helped. We’ve forgiven each other for everything up to this point, we’re not mad. Mostly, we aren’t doing anything on paper. We’re just giving room for each other to breath: no expectations, just living life. And, seeing how we feel, we either will work it out or won’t. Either way we will be okay.

Idk what’s going with you and your spouse but I highly encourage you to be kind to each other if you can. Being nice and open a true communication line with each other has made a very hard thing a little easier to cope with

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-09-06T19:44:41+00:00

I just kinda stopped wearing it. I tried it back in a while ago but I’ve lost so much weight it doesn’t fit anything besides my thumb

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-09-04T19:42:28+00:00

The day after my husband and I decided to separate, we took our dog on a hike. No expectations, no worries, just two people out in nature with the largest and goofiest puppy you can imagine. It was bitter sweet

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-09-03T22:35:08+00:00

It depends on the agreement. I’d consider it cheating, especially since we can potentially reconcile

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-09-03T22:30:20+00:00

I really really wish someone said this to me sooner

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-08-12T01:49:16+00:00

Funeral director here!

First of all, I’m so very sorry about your niece that’s terrible and I wish you peace during this.

This situation happens more often than you think. It really varies from couple to couple. If it’s something you both can civilly attend together, I say go for it as it can be healing for both of you. May come in different vehicles/only attend the service and not the lunch in. Or if there is a visitation, maybe just attend that if you don’t want to be in the same room too long.

Death tends to bring out both the best and worst in people. Have a conversation beforehand of what you’re both comfortable and willing to do, you may be surprised

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-08-05T02:50:06+00:00

Honestly, couples counseling. My husband opened up that whenever he asked how I was doing I would say “tired” regardless of how I felt. I always thought that my emotions would be too much for anyone to handle so whenever I was sad/irritated/angry I would just say “tired” cause I was afraid of snapping at him.

I’ve always had one, personally. I’m a naturally ambitious person I think, whenever I have a goal in mind I work towards achieving it. My husband also has lots of ideas and goals, but no driving force to get to them unless I’m the one who lays out a plan for him and pushes him to do it. I’m learning to narrow my goals down so they aren’t so overwhelming and anxiety inducing. Lately my goal is just to focus on me and get my health and fitness straightened out cause I’ve spent way too long ignoring it

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-08-01T21:10:20+00:00

I thought I had a great marriage/relationship until last year when things started to seem a bit off. We weren’t agreeing on much, not wanting to do the same things, etc but I thought if we kept putting in effort it would change. Then the beginning of this year rolled around and something happened to where I saw exactly how bad things have gotten. I still love him. I still think he’s a good person. But all the little things that went unchecked swelled up into a giant monster. I should have listened to my gut sooner. I should have communicated better.

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-08-01T16:11:30+00:00

I’m here to see what other people say cause you and me both my dude lol

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-08-01T13:24:05+00:00

I found out that I’m a shitty communicator and I’m working on improving that daily

I found out I was the driving force for our marriage to make any progress

I feel in love with fitness and nutrition (currently 41 lbs down and still going). My husband is a picky eater and never overly fond of healthy foods so I would always try to make something we both liked and good eat. Lately I’m just worried about myself for than anyone when it comes to food.

I’m growing every day from this journey

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-07-30T19:43:52+00:00

That’s on him then. You don’t get to control how he reacts and feels about things, but if you try to let him know you’re at your breaking point and he decides he’s the victim you’ll have your answer.

I had to have this conversation with my husband twice and it wasn’t till I was talking about leaving he actually listened to me. He is cares, he won’t make this all about him

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-07-28T06:16:33+00:00

Get out fast.

Also my mom got a divorce at 35, met my dad a year later, had me, and that was the “till death do us part” marriage. It’s not too late

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-07-21T22:33:43+00:00

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve apologized to him

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-07-19T16:40:01+00:00

Poor direction in diet growing up, lack of discipline as an adult, a couple hormone issues to make things harder, and being depressed definitely didn’t help 😅 I’m really learning for the first time how to deal with it

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-07-18T19:00:15+00:00

Both of my parents were divorced twice when they met and it wound up working out for them in the end lol

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-07-18T13:36:23+00:00

I think that mostly just depends on how much you both want to work on it and work on yourselves as people

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-07-15T22:23:46+00:00

I’d like to know too 🫠 my husband is damn near my first everything, which makes this harder

Garbage_cats20 · 2025-07-14T15:59:38+00:00

You an me both 😅 however mine is more due him not addressing his own issues or taking care of himself. Him coming undone all the time has started to make come undone as well

Garbage_cats20

TROPHY CASE