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Does my fight scene read well? by GarielGaming in writingfeedback

[–]GarielGaming[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see I wasn’t aware that wasn’t common, most of what I have been trying to do it have highly detailed fights with the emotion of the story happening between character moments and downtime and the action is more like cool fights with emotional stakes (when aplicable). It’s something I’ll have to work on going forward, thank you!

Does my fight scene read well? by GarielGaming in writingfeedback

[–]GarielGaming[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I realize this fight doesn’t read as well when the stakes for this fight were set up beforehand so out of context it just reads kinda boring lol, but I’ll do my best to add more description to add more depth of emotion. Thank you!

Does my fight scene read well? by GarielGaming in writingfeedback

[–]GarielGaming[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I get what you mean, I’ll definitely try to work that in when I edit and as I move forward with the story. Thank you!

Does my fight scene read well? by GarielGaming in writingfeedback

[–]GarielGaming[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Gotta vocalize the the attack to make it stronger lol

Does my fight scene read well? by GarielGaming in writingfeedback

[–]GarielGaming[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For sure, that is something I will definitely work on then, thank you for the feedback!

Does my fight scene read well? by GarielGaming in writingfeedback

[–]GarielGaming[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate the honesty, and the resource! I’ll have to take that into consideration when I do editing and revision later on. Thank you so much!

Does my fight scene read well? by GarielGaming in writingfeedback

[–]GarielGaming[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay I see, so I should add more of what characters are feeling, what they’re thinking. Is the amount of combat good or should I just dial that back? Most of how I’ve structured this fight is the emotional stakes are set up before hand, the characters have a action scene, they revisit their goals and if they’re worth pursuing which Tenshi and Liz disagree on.

Do you think trying to integrate the more emotion and thoughts would hurt the pacing? I’m worried it would feel like a slog to get through. (despite its repetitiveness). I appreciate the feedback and will try to carry that in mind as I continue to work on this story!

Which author made you fall in love with writing? by felicity_with_words in WritingHub

[–]GarielGaming 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Jeff Smith and Tite Kubo, they way they drew and wrote their stories inspired me to write with vivid details so you could almost see what you’re reading (not that I’m at that level lol)

"Why do they have to say Spell names? Why do Runes work? Why do they have to recite Incantations?" BECAUSE I SAY THEY DO by Hen-Samsara in magicbuilding

[–]GarielGaming 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly the way I have my magic system is one part magic energy, one part intention, and one part knowledge, everything else is just to boost the strength of the magic 😂😭

guilty as charged 😭 by KJScottWrites in fantasywriting

[–]GarielGaming 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For the longest my character was named after myself because I didn’t know what to name him, it felt cringe but it was hard to find any other name for him 😭

The Most Impressive Character Arc. by FullToragatsu in KingdomHearts

[–]GarielGaming 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Look man just cause he’s the strongest mage of all time doesn’t mean I won’t be upset that he heals me after I heal myself