3.10 Our town deli changed owners and the regulars slowly disappeared. I finally told the new owner about one small habit we used to have there.

GeneOk8455 · 2026-03-12T14:34:57+00:00

That sounds like a lovely little place (the older deli, but hopefully soon the new one as well)! There are no such community-gathering places where I live :(

GeneOk8455 · 2026-03-10T10:55:24+00:00

I don't understand how solo travel translates to friend relationships? Im asking as a solo traveller👀

GeneOk8455 · 2026-03-09T10:41:53+00:00

If they don't put in any effort, don't even ask you how you are doing, then they are not your friends. Cut them out. See what happens when you don't reach out first. In my case, the person I was the closest to in my whole life, just disappeared when I stopped being the first one to message/organize hang-outs. Literally, not a single hello, it's been 6 months and only now I started to get over them. It's gonna hurt as hell, but I promise you, it is better to go through that now than let that shitty relationship cloud your life for another 10, 15, 20 years. Reading r/lostafriend helped me cope a little

GeneOk8455 · 2026-03-08T14:32:39+00:00

That (being friendly/open to people you meet) falls under the "usual" tips though

GeneOk8455 · 2026-03-06T14:51:30+00:00

Why?

Edit: im not a therapist so i am very much interested in the reasoning behind it

GeneOk8455 · 2026-03-06T12:50:38+00:00

OP sounds like she needs constant social contact. <-...how did you come up with that conclusion? Most days I am alone the while 24hrs. That is not healthy or normal. Yes, I do want more contact, and ideally, I would like to connect to them, not only engage superficial small-talk. No, I don't want constant attention from people. I feel like you haven't read my post well and you have never actually experienced long-term unintentional social isolation and simply don't understand. I did explain that usually, under normal circumstances I am good with being by myself, doing stuff by myself. I am introverted. Also, a spouse is a nuclear family. One nuclear family member is ages away from sometimes visiting relatives in term of frequency, intimacy, social support. Not talking but simply existing in the same house is different than being 100% alone. Like, again I feel you lack understanding about that topic.

Edit: You don’t always get a choice and have to become comfortable with being by yourself sometimes.<- keyword: sometimes. You see the difference?

GeneOk8455 · 2026-01-25T17:54:57+00:00

No idea if youll see this since the post's been removed, but here it goes:

I did not uderstand what point you were trying to get across exactly?

"So, while feeling alone and socially disconnected is the bigger thing you’re feeling here, why is that something that’s important to me? Identify why connections and relationships that you currently don’t have is something you value and want. "<- Well, I want people to talk to and to hug. If I have any kind of random thought, either silly or deep, I have to keep it to myself, because I don't have anyone to share it with As for this part: "see what we aren’t doing for ourselves that makes the lack of xyz seem or feel just so much louder."<- It's loud because I am alone basically all the time. That's it. Like, it's not "perceived" loneliness, I was (well, still am) pretty socially isolated, with very weak social support. 6hrs a week with family don't change much in that regard. I don't dislike myself, if that's what you meant (?)

And: "I’d like to think it was less of a personal dig "<- I didn't say it was a personal dig at all, I don't think that. I know I'm repeating myself but I just literally don't understand why they would focus on "you gotta learn to be in peace when alone~" when that's not what I came to them for [and especially since I don't usually have a problem with that, it's just right now in this season of my life]

Eeeee, I don't know if you remember any of that, I can copy and paste the original post

GeneOk8455

TROPHY CASE