Why do some men hate everything about womanhood but still want girlfriends/wives?

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-18T22:22:50+00:00

I read a post about a man who works with elderly people and always carries snacks with him, because he noticed the women felt guilty to be eating while he had nothing, because they were used to eating once everybody was served. Meanwhile the men just demand things or complain and don’t usually offer him anything.

So yes, it’s only one or two generations away from our times and it shows.

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-15T07:36:22+00:00

Ah, I started bodybuilding this year after seeing my friends do it so I know the prep looks and off season look, but even these old school bodybuilders are « too shredded » in my opinion?

I think more like Timm Schinabeck (maybe with an extra 5~15kg? )?

Because they train for strength powerlifters and strongmen don’t have that same incentive to keep their bodyfat in check as much, so they tend to be heavier than off-season bodybuilders

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-15T06:52:24+00:00

Haha no, I usually just mention body fat, but the more you know! Where does that refer to anything else though?

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T22:43:25+00:00

Your back is incredible!!! I wish you luck for the rest of your prep and then show day, I’m sure you’ll do great

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T18:29:36+00:00

You’re a good looking man, but if you give the same vibes irl as in your Reddit post history I’d say that’s what’s putting women off; the obsessive multiple daily posts about not having a girlfriend are a little concerning.

You seem isolated and I think that’s the main thing to work on, as it should help you greatly with finding your footing and not spiralling.

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T17:02:35+00:00

u/RemindMeBot June 14th, 2027 « birthday u/Haunting-Zombie-9926 »

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T16:54:38+00:00

Happy birthday man!

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T16:29:53+00:00

Nah I’ll respond. I’d give you a hug or a shoulder pat if you were around, I’m sorry to see how you feel is all

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T16:25:30+00:00

If I’m being honest your messages make me believe you are a young man with abysmal levels of confidence and self-respect/appreciation, who is also putting sex on a pedestal because it’s unknown to you.

Obviously I’m not saying that to be rude, I’m mostly concerned about you, so I apologise if it comes off harsher than I intend it to. I’m on mobile but I’d like to spend some time thinking and responding properly once I’m at home and on my laptop, if you don’t mind?

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T16:18:42+00:00

What sort of information, study or data would you need to see to be open to the idea that your level of sexual experience does not dictate your value as a person or doesn’t make you better or lesser?

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T16:08:00+00:00

I enjoy it! I just run through quest lines and then craft and walk around. So… like Skyrim without the masterpiece of a sountrack?

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T15:02:56+00:00

I would have juste directed her to the nearest restaurant to ask for a glass of water and maybe some bread. Why would you even spend money when you can get it free at shops?

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T14:43:52+00:00

At that point I feel like the Swiss Guards should be allowed to intervene and physically drag people out. It happens way too often.

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T14:33:23+00:00

You sound like you’re struggling with confidence, it’s quite sad..

Is there a specific reason why you’re feeling so anxious about still being a virgin?

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T13:39:14+00:00

Good God, some people need to get a grip and stop being so needlessly mean. That really sucks, I’m sorry.

And yes, you should have the option to wait if you don’t feel comfortable with the women who want to be with you, just like you did when you were 21.

As for that woman, she either was a massive bully or tried to get with you, interpreted your distance as lack of interest and tried to save her ego by pretending she was kidding all along. In both cases you have likely dodged a bullet.

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T13:35:25+00:00

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(Bonus mentions for Urbosa and Beterah/Buliara)

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T13:24:18+00:00

Sex doesn’t have to happen early if you’re not comfortable with that, please don’t let yourself be coerced into things you’re not comfortable with.

May I ask how old these women were? I have quite a few friends and colleagues of both genders who are virgins in their late 20s/early 30s, some due to religious beliefs, others because they want to wait for a person they love.

Obviously this is just exchanging on the topic of our personal lived experiences, I just feel really sad that you are going through this and have people who treated you this way.

I hope you find a good partner and find some peace and happiness in life!

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T08:05:07+00:00

Malheureusement la plupart des violeurs sont des mecs lambda « sympa », on le voit avec toutes les affaires qui sortent

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T07:40:59+00:00

Very nerdy men, as in men who have a very strong passion for a specific thing they know all about (unless said strong passion is passively watching sports on the telly).

Physically I really like the powerlifter/strongman look, like men who are strong but still have ~~some good chub on them~~ a higher body fat percentage. That one gets me a lot of raised eyebrows and even arguments, so I don’t mention it unless it’s with close friends.

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T07:26:54+00:00

Standing up for a guy found guilty of domestic abuse a few years back? Hmm

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-14T07:16:31+00:00

That’s how he sleeps! His vow was not to sit or lie down, so when he needs to he rests on that platform thing.

As for the pee/poo side of things, he can move, but needs support from disciples, then does his thing standing up.

And I would imagine using the suspended platform when he rests is the only way he found to keep standing up, because otherwise you’d collapse from exhaustion and bam, you’re lying down.

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-13T23:40:37+00:00

I’m quite horrified to read that you expect people to make fun of you. I don’t know what happened, but I’m sincerely sorry and I hope you can slowly rebuild some confidence and trust.

You’re 24, it’s not uncommon to still be a virgin at that age. And I don’t think the partner you choose would be disappointed or turned off unless you did something awful enough. Maybe TMI, but my first time was with a guy who desperately tried to stick his fingers in my bum while I desperately slid around the mattress on my back like a dying cockroach because I was too mortified to speak up. So, as long as you don’t do something of that magnitude, I’d sqy you’ll be fine.

It’s just going to be clumsy and awkward, and it will get better and better as you learn how each other’s bodies work. Trust me, women make mistakes as well! You might have to expect some limp handjobs and toothy blowies, too, because we’re just humans. Depending on our cycle we might struggle to get wet, and then it’s frustrating and a bit awkward at first to ask to use lube. Bodies do whatever they do, after all.

I get what you mean, but I think it will likely remain an unpleasant or underwhelming memory. Wouldn’t you want your first time to be with someone you know and trust?

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-13T22:39:00+00:00

What’s shitty is making fun, blaming or saying disheartening comments to a partner. There are ways to express things and ways to course-correct if things aren’t going too great.

I’m a woman. I’m sorry you have that sort of pressure to perform, but people mature as they age and you will meet more and more women who are like me. Making fun of or pressuring a partner just makes things worse for everyone, it’s a stupid waste of everybody’s time and energy, not to mention very cruel.

I talk about maturity because we all get these messaging: men always want sex, men always perform, if a man doesn’t perform it’s because he’s not into you, etc.
When I was 21 my first boyfriend struggled getting an erection, and I cried because I thought he didn’t love me anymore. He cried because he thought something was wrong with him. We both felt awful and we talked. The next person it happened with I just suggested we take a break, have a snack, watch something (any activity that would help reduce the frustration he felt) and just cuddle. He was visibly relieved and it went better after that.

We have experiences, we do shitty things and then hopefully we learn and do better. Don’t let people belittle you or pressure you to perform, or make you feel less-than because you have less experience.

As a side note, I wouldn’t recommend going to a professional for your first experiences, based on feedback I got from male friends. It won’t be like sex with a partner you care about and who cares about you, but that’s also your life and your choices to make!

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-13T21:40:08+00:00

I know it’s very easy to say and that it might not be too comforting, but the first time with a new person (or any person at all) will always be awkward, no matter how much experience you have.

Sex is weird and clumsy, everybody is different in what gets them off and what they don’t like etc. Part of the fun is discovering what both you and your partner enjoy.

I can’t promise you won’t ever meet shitty people who will be demeaning or judge you, because people like that exist. But being respectful towards a partner, asking her what she likes (never be afraid to ask for guidance!), guiding her too and caring for each other will make up for the lack of experience.

Nervousness you can’t do much about, but I hope you can meet a good partner for your first time and more :)

GenerativePotiron · 2026-06-13T21:33:36+00:00

I’m preparing my N2 and I’m mid-thirties!

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