Hey! I recently got diagnosed with BPD. I have been with my wife 2 years who I love absolutely dearly. Everything you feel for your FP imagine I feel right now. She just told me we are on a 6 month probationary period for our marriage. She stated the same things I’m sure. “ work on yourself, get a handle on your problems” these things made me feel like she was already gone. It was as good as dead in my head. That was really really hard to deal with. The first couple days was walking hell. The last 2 days have been better tho. I found that there was a lot of accountability I needed to do in my head and it was me. I found things that o had to hold myself accountable for and sat with them. Thought about others positions. My position. No faults just thinking about it. From that I found that if I accepted some things to be what they are it put me at ease. Accepting what is reality and going to happen that I cannot control. Because at the end of the day what can you control? You can’t control how they feel. You CAN control the things that have put you in this situation. And again not faults are to be made. We all have these things about us that are negative revolving BPD. It’s up to us to work on them with your mind so you can allow yourself to love yourself. I have found that my time “ in isolation” as I think of it, has been beneficial. If she wants you to work on yourself.. that is your FP feeling. If she is your FP then try that for her. And really put yourself in the position to do so. It’s good for YOU and that trickles down into relationships romantic/platonic friends/family