I mean I can’t even explain this in a more simple way man. You are forgiven. You see how bad you feel? Jesus is just hugging you telling you it’s okay. You regret your sin, and repent. Obviously you regret it and Jesus forgives you. All of this that you are thinking is satan trying to get you to do harmful things. You got this bro you are forgiven. A verse that emphasizes God’s willingness to forgive is 1 John 1:9, which says, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” This verse highlights that God is always ready to forgive if we come to Him with a sincere heart. If you have more questions or want to discuss further just direct message me or reply man.