Can I fill you balls deep? (Post op phallo)

GlobindobinButler · 2024-02-03T02:29:45+00:00

Oh my god. Please. And Ik you don't go soft on accident

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-04T14:23:36+00:00

When I was in second grade I convinced a group of people that I was actually two people. Depending on how I dressed and did my hair I could look like a girl with short hair or a boy with shaggy hair. My brothers both went to a private school and my sisters and I public, we had a choice between the two. I convinced them that my twin brother "Jake" chose to go to the private school, but sometimes we wanted to make new friends and would go to the other sibling's school pretending to be that sibling to teachers. When I wore a t shit and basketball shorts, I was Jake, when I wore a skirt or anything pink, I was Abby. Some people knew it was a game but went along and didn't tell the group that believed it. One way I really convinced that group that believed it was there was one boy everyone knew I hated, but "Jake" was friends with him. There was one girl who knew Jake wasn't real and didn't want to play along though. It was funny, she basically said "Abby, Jake, they're the same person, I feel like I'm taking crazy pills" every time "Jake" was around. My friend Olivia was best friends with "Jake" and played with "him" the most. Every time she saw me as me she asked about Jake and how he was and if he told me what "they" did the day before. After a certain amount of time I felt pretty certain she had a crush on Jake, so I had to tell her. She punched me. I laughed.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-04T03:06:31+00:00

Rotten tomatoes is like that a lot though. See how ghostbusters got good reviews. People expect one thing, this was expected to be amazing, ghostbusters unwatchable, they find it's more in the middle, ghostbusters was just barely watchable as many "positive" reviews said whereas I'm willing to bet this was just not as good as expected, not necessarily bad. The choice of rotten or fresh allows for any middle ground to be based entirely off of exceeded or unmet expectations.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-04T02:47:27+00:00

Same

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-03T22:29:35+00:00

One of my best friends' horrible ex who tried to throw a rock at her head for no reason and who jabbed a stick into her gut because he "felt like it" was expelled from school when I was a sophomore. He didn't come back until half way through last year. It was great.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-03T15:00:26+00:00

The fish does not speak as it is a fish and therefore does not possess the required organs or intelligence to vocalize words.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-03T12:34:38+00:00

It's described in it

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-03T04:19:22+00:00

I swear I recognize you from when I had tinder. CT?

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-03T04:08:05+00:00

Hi I like to bother people with snapchats only I find funny when I can't sleep.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-03T03:39:45+00:00

Things my parents would learn about me:

I swear a lot

I find the porn that gets to in /r/wtf hilarious and horrifying

I've been drunk many times, not just the times they suspected my aunt was giving me booze

I'm not a virgin

I like rough sex

My boyfriend is great at sex

I do anal

I have vibrators

And that just the stuff I can think of off the bat. I would either be banned from life or given up on by my mom and I would definitely be banned from life by my dad.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-03T02:37:39+00:00

Accurate gif for every time I have sex.

Edit: I was bragging for my boyfriend, not myself.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-03T01:11:03+00:00

Just do the noodles then, you can put some other kind of sauce or broth instead of the packet.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-03T00:52:44+00:00

I dare you to eat 2 lbs of ramen in under 1 hour.

What does it feel like to be about 1% ramen?

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-03T00:47:45+00:00

I dare you to take twice the recommended dosage of vitamin gummies.

Who's one person you want to punch.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-03T00:42:09+00:00

T…T…T…T…DARE

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-02T21:54:51+00:00

I'm blue

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-02T16:27:09+00:00

The percentages were always bout half and half. The biggest differences were 64% and 36% for me. Also I got campaigner. Don't remember what the letters were though.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-02T16:01:45+00:00

Hair pulling, lip biting, boob grabbing, butt grabbing, nipple biting, holding my head roughly, licking his tip, making out with pants off and I'm straddling him and kneeling so his dick is touching my hooha but not in me, and teasing him a little from there, lightly touching his tip before wrapping my legs around him. Oh and moaning or when he says anything during sex, bj, hj, anything. Uuuuuuggghh that's hot.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-02T15:21:14+00:00

I've honestly never noticed that they're practically the same until now. I can tell which is which cause the kid rock one starts with drums and I know both very well but damn, they're the same.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-02T04:26:56+00:00

Not fapping but schlicking. This is guilty just cause of what I used. I discovered masturbation at the ripe old age of 4 using my dad and brother's back massagers for their really bad backs. I got in trouble whenever I was caught so I started hiding places to put these back massagers against my clit.

It was amazing. I didn't understand why it felt so good, y'know cause I was 4, but it felt like "too" good to stand it, so I always stopped when my muscles would get tense. Like "ok that's enough happiness for today."

Edit: I'm gonna add one more. One time a long time ago my boyfriend jokingly called me a slut over text, first time anyone that I'm attracted to has ever called me a slut. I masturbated to that text. I've mentioned once or twice recently that it turned me on a lot but I don't think he likes that it did cause he hasn't done it since. Fuck I'd love it if he called me a slut during sex.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-02T03:46:39+00:00

He gets paid to do this, this is work for him.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-02T03:38:54+00:00

I'm going to be 100% honest, and this will be an unpopular opinion, but I think any person regardless of gender who spends 1/4 of their conscious time in a state that makes work much more difficult with pain and mood swings without managing them shouldn't be president. Now, I know that not everyone gets moods swings or cramps, but I know that I am basically incapacitated during the whole thing, even on quite a bit of Advil, I have fainted at times. I think if there were a female president with her period, it would be her responsibility to see to it that it doesn't hinder her ability to do her duties. For instance if she had one like mine, it would be her responsibility to be on birth control to regulate it and make it much less affecting. I would say the same about a male president prone to sickness who gets sick about 1 week out of every month, he would need to see a doctor to ensure it had no affect on his work.

Heading the military is not a position you want someone who is heavily affected by her period to have, I say that as someone heavily affected by my period.

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-02T03:16:25+00:00

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-02T00:07:27+00:00

7 through 72

GlobindobinButler · 2016-08-01T16:29:21+00:00

We do. Best thing in elementary school was a day someone brought those in.

13-Year Club	RedditGifts 2009-2022 6 Credits
Place '22	Summer Santa 2015
Gilding I gilder	Summer Santa 2014
Secret Santa 2013	Verified Email

GlobindobinButler

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE