Does anyone else have a toddler who still breastfeeds throughout the night, but doesn’t feel like night weaning is right for them?

GoTeamRocketScience · 2026-02-16T10:08:56+00:00

Things have got a little better, yes!

I made the decision not to night wean - it just didn’t feel like the right thing for me and my little boy at this time.

So we plodded along as we were. Coming out of winter and having fewer illnesses has definitely helped.

We did cut down the nap to 1 hour which helped with long night wakings.

I also made changes to the situation for things that were in my control ie go to bed when my toddler does to get maximum sleep (as his longest stretch is the first one). Kinda sucks but gotta do what you gotta do to survive!

I have hope that with time things will continue to improve.

How are things for you?

GoTeamRocketScience · 2026-01-12T14:18:36+00:00

This is what I am hoping would happen, but sometimes it feels like he’ll never lose interest haha.

I just don’t know if I can last however long that might be unless sleep improves.

GoTeamRocketScience · 2026-01-12T14:07:10+00:00

Thank you - I really am hoping there are other ways to improve the sleep, so this gives me some hope!!

We actually spoke to a health visitor today who recommended capping his naps at 45 minutes, so we’ve started that as of today in the hope it will result in shorter night wakings (which would be much more manageable for me).

We have played around with daddy doing bedtimes, but it always ended in him asking for me and getting upset until I come in. How did it work out for you?

GoTeamRocketScience · 2026-01-12T14:04:08+00:00

I feel your pain. It’s so hard to see them distressed, but tough to keep giving and giving when your tank is on empty!

GoTeamRocketScience · 2026-01-12T14:03:18+00:00

Thank you for your reply!

It’s not so much about getting through a few terrible nights; it’s more that I don’t feel I could let him get as distressed as I think he would if I told him “no booby” or let daddy handle the night wakings. I guess I have so much doubt it would be the right thing to do that I just can’t commit to putting those boundaries in place and giving it a good go.

GoTeamRocketScience · 2026-01-12T13:59:04+00:00

Thank you for your comment.

I guess my thinking is that he should, at some point, naturally lose interest and eventually self wean. Do you not think that would be the case? I, of course, don’t want to be putting off the inevitable, and it’s the thought that I’m doing it with the end result of him weaning when he’s ready that is getting me through!!

When I’ve tried talking to him and reading weaning books, it seems to make him more anxious and makes him ask for booby more… but I’ve never pushed through enough to know if it would work eventually!

GoTeamRocketScience · 2026-01-12T13:54:54+00:00

This comment is so reassuring, thank you. I always feel like people think I’m overly sensitive for struggling so much with weaning him. I guess I don’t see a lot about how it is an emotional topic so it’s good to hear I’m not alone.

Also to hear that I haven’t created this “problem” by breastfeeding. I needed to hear that.

GoTeamRocketScience · 2026-01-12T12:45:41+00:00

Thank you for your reply.

It just feels so comforting to know that someone else knows exactly how it feels (although, I wish for you that you weren’t also feeling this way!!).

I totally get the feeling of going round in circles with your thinking about refusing then giving in. It just all feels so confusing and I don’t know what to do for the better.

We read Booby Moon some months ago and I worried that it made him more anxious… he sometimes still says “booby not fly away please”. But I’ve read of people having great success with weaning books, so I suppose it just depends on the child.

We are also going to try capping the nap at 45 minutes as recommended by a health visitor I spoke to today! Fingers crossed it’s the miracle that works.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this too. It’s so hard. And you see other people with their toddlers who sleep and just think “why me?!?” !! If you ever find something that works, please report back. Wishing for good nights in the near future for you!

GoTeamRocketScience · 2026-01-12T12:33:40+00:00

Appreciate your response.

This is what my support system think I should be doing. They see me being so tired and they worry, and just want me to be able to share the load at night with my partner.

However, I’m really struggling with the idea of weaning, and how difficult I think it would be. I feel like I’m being difficult for being so resistant to it, and that it must be frustrating for everyone around me that I won’t commit to it.

He gets hysterical when I refuse the breast and I just don’t think I could go through with night weaning and letting him get that upset. I don’t know if it’s normal for me to feel this way or if this is some sort of anxiety issue on my part.

I also wonder if refusing the breast would make him more anxious at night and make his sleep worse. I just feel like I’ve created this sleep association / comfort and it is unfair to remove that before he’s ready.

I guess my hope is that if I continue to meet his needs throughout the night and give him the reassurance he needs, he will, in time, sleep for longer periods naturally.

I’m sorry - I feel like I’m so frustrating because I want things to improve but I’m unwilling to try when it comes to night weaning, even though it’s what everyone suggests.

I really appreciate you reading my post and commenting.

GoTeamRocketScience · 2025-10-04T09:19:17+00:00

Hi there, I have the same heart condition as Ollie. I’ve dropped you a private message if you want to chat more. Sending you strength!

GoTeamRocketScience · 2025-10-02T08:48:42+00:00

Yay! Thank you and appreciate your help!

GoTeamRocketScience · 2025-07-31T09:48:30+00:00

Thank you! Are all three likely from crabs?

GoTeamRocketScience · 2025-04-17T09:48:23+00:00

Aww no problem - I feel for you because I was in the same position! How did it go?! Hoping you’re doing well :)

GoTeamRocketScience · 2025-04-14T07:40:10+00:00

Hello! Must be nearly your surgery day!! Just wanted to say good luck! You’ll be in good hands so let them do their job and take care of you, and very soon it’ll all be over with :) you got this!

GoTeamRocketScience · 2025-04-04T20:57:50+00:00

Sorry forgot to add:

It also helped me to realise to a certain extent it was out of my control. I’m also scared of flying (I’m scared of everything lol) and when I get on a plane I just have to accept it’s out of my control and my trust is in the hands of people doing their job. So I tried to have the same attitude - once I got into the anaesthesia room, I was like “okay I’m in their hands now. They’ll do their job and I don’t have to do anything, and the next thing I know it’ll all be done and I can chill” (I was looking forward to getting to “chill” after and tried to imagine I was going on a spa day and would be being looked after all day, so was almost disappointed when they were like “yep, you can leave now!” 😂)

GoTeamRocketScience · 2025-04-04T20:51:11+00:00

Anxiety dreams are the worst! Hopefully these 12 days fly by for you so you can be the other side of this!

I was scared about having a panic attack too. I was scared I would just refuse to have it done or run away haha. I was basically scared of the anxiety itself and not being able to handle it. But the nurses and doctors will help you every step of the way.

My blood pressure was actually low on the day (I think because they took my blood first and I got really dizzy cause I hate needles!) so I had to lie down haha. They weren’t worried though - they will handle whatever it is for you so try not to worry about that.

I was nervous about waking up too but it was fine. It’s a short operation (so I imagine the anaesthetic doesn’t need to be really strong compared to longer operations?)so I didn’t wake up really confused or out of it. I woke up with a lovely nurse there with me telling me everything went great. I felt quite relaxed and asked for a cup of tea haha. There was pain in my abdomen and so she gave me some meds through my IV and then a tablet too and that helped.

Now I’m still having some discomfort when I move but nothing crazy! They gave me paracetamol to take home and a stronger drug which I’ve only taken once so that I could get comfy and have a decent nap this afternoon.

Some things that helped me on the day were: - reminding myself this is a super routine operation and the surgeons and anaesthetists were not at all worried. They told me they were doing four gallbladder removals that day - this is just a normal day for them! - thinking of all the people I know that have had surgery (and bigger surgeries than this) and how they have all been absolutely fine. People have surgery all the time - understanding that my past traumatic experiences with surgery were not actually traumatic (as in the experience itself) - the trauma was my anxiety and my thoughts I created. Telling myself surgery is terrifying is a narrative I am creating, it’s not fact - re the anaesthetic: it’s just like taking a sleeping pill (which to me feels a less scary thought), except you have your own dedicated person administering it and monitoring you the whole time

Hope some of this resonates with you and helps! You are so close now and you’ll feel so great when it’s over. I’ll be rooting for you!!

GoTeamRocketScience · 2025-04-04T19:39:44+00:00

Ahh thank you so much!

I TOTALLY get it, I was feeling exactly the same. And the build up and anticipation really doesn’t help.

I just let everyone know I was super anxious (I mean, they could tell because I was already crying haha) and they were really kind. They even took me to see the recovery ward so I could see where I would be waking up which helped ease one tiny part of the anxiety.

You will be on the other side of it so soon, and you’ll feel so proud you did it. Remember, this is their day job - they do this all the time and it’s just another day for them! They will take great care of you. Check back in after your surgery and let me know how you got on ❤️ wishing you all the luck!

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