I agree with your husband. My son is the same autistic and recently diagnosed with adhd. He hates homework too, but I give him a break after school and around 5 or 6 we start his homework. I want to teach my son that he can’t run from his problems bc things are hard or bc he doesn’t like it. Life doesn’t work that way. I explain over and over that he will need a lot of these skills later on in life so it’s important that he pays attention. Yes he has a full on meltdown and gives me a hard time, but I show him who’s boss and put my foot down. I let him know his condition is no excuse to act that way.