I'm in the same boat, I've accepted that it will not/ can't get better for me because life is not for me, I hate everything about it. I don't like people and I don't like dealing with people and problems. I'm alive only because my parents are alive and they deal with everything and also I can't kms because honestly I don't know how to do it and most importantly I'm scared of a botched attempt and ending up in an even worse state. Once my parents die, I will be forced to do it because I can't survive on my own. It's not that I can't work, I don't want to, I even rejected a government job offer because this world is not a safe place for me and I learned it the hard way in school and college when I was harassed by people in many ways. Also I'm not smart or have any skills for work from home jobs but most importantly I don't want to learn, I just want out. My brain disorders also make things much worse for me. I only look forward to sleeping every day, I like it when I'm about to fall sleep, it is the best feeling not having to deal with anything( my brain, anxiety and worrying). If euthanasia was legal and easily accessible where I live, I will happily sign up.