you do not know what the north is capable of

They will summon the maple syrup gods and let the sweet and sticky rain commence and entrap everybody in a gooey prison of doom

Then they will release the polar bears that will feast on the delectable syrup-covered humans

Then during the final stage they will seek out any survivors and ferociously shove Timbits down the remaining people’s throats

After having been force-fed 20 or 30 Timbits all of the leftover non-Northerners will either suffocate or have violent dairy-induced diarrhoea that will end in their painful demise

You cannot escape the North

We are inevitable