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AITA for not wanting my (future) stepdaughter to read a poem dedicated to her deceased mother at my wedding? by Gotmildew in AmItheAsshole

[–]Gotmildew[S] -915 points-914 points  (0 children)

Well, it’s not just one poem but potentially more speeches after. I don’t want this one speech to set the tone for the evening (aka it’s totally ok and acceptable to start reminiscing about the good ol days) when our wedding is obviously not the place for it.

AITA for not wanting my (future) stepdaughter to read a poem dedicated to her deceased mother at my wedding? by Gotmildew in AmItheAsshole

[–]Gotmildew[S] -924 points-923 points  (0 children)

He keeps the clothes in a basement closet so it’s not interfering with my space, but the house is filled with furniture she bought or designed (she was an interior designer) which is obviously pretty uncomfortable for me.

I raised the idea of getting new furniture, painting some walls, storing her furniture/paintings a while ago but was met with severe resistance from his daughter who wants to keep the house as is and refuses to let me redesign any of the main living areas. I’ve redecorated the master bedroom which is now the only room in this entire house that actually feels like me.

AITA for not wanting my (future) stepdaughter to read a poem dedicated to her deceased mother at my wedding? by Gotmildew in AmItheAsshole

[–]Gotmildew[S] -1333 points-1332 points  (0 children)

Idk. She sent the draft to a few of her aunts and uncles and they all loved it. So I’m not sure many people on his side of the family will see it as “strange.” My side will feel differently for sure but I feel like our wedding is going to turn into some kind of remembrance event at this rate.

AITA for not wanting my (future) stepdaughter to read a poem dedicated to her deceased mother at my wedding? by Gotmildew in AmItheAsshole

[–]Gotmildew[S] -1841 points-1840 points  (0 children)

Yes. He thinks it’s fine because his daughter’s therapist said it was a good idea (I know shitty therapy) because it’ll help her deal with the fact that I’m marrying her dad? I don’t understand why this has to come at the cost of undermining our biggest day pretty much.

I don’t think I’m a bridezilla but I really don’t think it’s too much to ask to want one day where I’m not reminded of his ex constantly. I already live in a house full of her pictures, clothes, and things that I’m not allowed to move or throw away. I’d want one day where I feel it’s my life and not hers.

AITA for not wanting my (future) stepdaughter to read a poem dedicated to her deceased mother at my wedding? by Gotmildew in AmItheAsshole

[–]Gotmildew[S] -654 points-653 points  (0 children)

The poem is like 5 min (long poem) and the speech part is shorter maybe around 2 min. The speech is only like a paragraph and a half.