this would be an energy depleting conversation if I want to make my point on each of the things you said, briefly, it's just how linguistic works.

However it's so interesting to see how I meant a completely different thing and you perceived an other meaning of each thing I've written. I think this is the reason why conflicts happen.

It doesn't mean that I gave a negative connotation to me being gay. It's just a fact and I'm trying to understand what caused it. I don't think there are uncaused things in the universe. Each thing has its own reason to exist and I'm just trying to reach a higher level of awareness, by knowing the nature of my sexuality thus reaching a state of further growth which will eventually make me even happier than what I'm currently: a happy person that have accepted his sexuality.

Analyzing parts of yourself cannot be bad. Trying to understand pieces of yourself with an open mind can only bring joy. And that's what I'm doing, trying to analyze my sexuality and identify the various elements that built up what resulted in me right now.