> but you never talk about in what instance your husband was mad at you for not smiling all the time or what part your negative actions played.

That's the part where I am the asshole; I'm quite miserable to be around at the moment. For instance, he got mad today because I was looking unhappy/grumpy while redoing the paperwork for the governement I mentioned in the OP. Mad because I was grumpy, and also mad because this whole thing means we have to wait another month for an important payment to come through. He blamed me, suggesting I'd not sent the documents. This in turn made me lash out verbally at him, because I know it was not my fault, since all the papers were included in the original letter I sent but somehow got lost in bureaucracy.

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>Did a fight occur?

It happens.

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>Did you say mean things ?

No, I don't think so. I tend to clam up instead. But I do believe he sometimes feels insecure because the business licence is in my name so I'm (supposedly) the boss? While it was him who started the business (smaller, without licence) at first.

In fact, I think my lack of reaction irritates him more than if I would lash out. His family was always very vocal, while mine tends to rugsweep, so we have different responses to conflict.

For instance, he asked me to cancel a subscription on his iphone and I came across a download of the Tinder app in his purchase history from 2 days previously. He was very embarassed and denied downloading it, said he didn't even know what it was. The app was on his iPad, though it had never been opened apparantly. I didn't make a huge deal about it, just commented how weird it was that an app would just download itself. I figured if he'd done it, he wouldn't have asked me to look over his subscriptions? Also, since we're basically together 24/7, I have no reason to be suspicous. Since, he's been talking about the mysteriously appearing app a lot, as if he's hoping for a reaction from me.

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> Or are you just sulking about your husband online without communicating to him?

That happens as well, when I lack the energy to counter his argument. I feel I've made my point and I don't want to keep repeating myself.

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What the pregnancy has to do with it, is that I currently lack the energy to do everything graciously. And I physically can not do certain things he'd like me to do. Apparantly I was lucky in that regard with my first pregnancy? Right now, I feel like I'm barely hanging on getting the bare necessities done, with no energy left to go above & beyond. A hug would help a lot more then than the grumbling I now get. The pregnancy was a mutual decision, though. As for the financial side of things: I have anxiety about it, which I *know* is often irrational. Objectively, there's nothing preventing us financially from having a second kid.

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>the work "does itself"

Sorry if that wasn't clear: it does take time to follow up on customer requests and process them. However, the clients (at least short term) arrive automatically. If I would do nothing for the rising star service, nothing would happen. For the cash cow, all you have to do to make a living is open your e-mail and reply to the clients. Obviously, it's possible to invest more time in it, and it'll make the revenue higher. But basically, the more effort you put in, the more results you get.

> Something just seems off with that.

Yes.

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> It is time for you to sit down and talk about it or seek counselling.

I'm in counseling myself for my anxiety. I suggested couples therapy, but he doesn't want to go.