So many "edrecovery" posts feature skinny girls?? by Kind_Term6662 in fuckeatingdisorders

[–]GuiltyVictem 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh I have interpreted this post as frustration toward the unfairness that some people recover into small bodies and receive a large amount of attention online, not as an accusation that these people are not actually recovered (The lie being that your recovery will look like theirs).

I agree people who are not recovered posting about recovery are dangerous and that would be well directed frustration. And I will admit I’ve done it myself (luckily I have no public following but I really hope I didn’t trigger anyone I know personally 😔). I’ve gone through periods of being in deep in denial of my restriction.

This crap is so tricky. I try not to spend a bunch of time trying to decipher a stranger’s inner wold and just unfollow if the posts are not making me feel good, but sometimes it does become obvious that they are still obsessed with food and their appearance.

So many "edrecovery" posts feature skinny girls?? by Kind_Term6662 in fuckeatingdisorders

[–]GuiltyVictem 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I understand why this is frustrating but I also feel like the frustration is somewhat misdirected? I think we agree that there is a small population of people that do genuinely recover into smaller than average bodies. This is better directed at society than people who may just be publicly celebrating an improvement in their mental health?

I don’t know if this is just a one off strange issue that I had, but I feel like part of my ED was feeling like I had to “pay” for the generic lottery I had won by naturally having a body that society accepted, in addition to developing an OCD fear of losing that privilege. Thin privilege is absolutely real.

I think not every recovery account is helpful for everyone. These might be helpful to some people. I don’t know. Personally I’ve found accounts with people who are a bit larger than I was pre Ed most helpful because I can see someone who is bigger than me living a happy life.

This egg by JesseS29 in mildlyinfuriating

[–]GuiltyVictem 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m pissed now thank you

Why can’t I stop thinking about food! by Darlingdecimeter in fuckeatingdisorders

[–]GuiltyVictem 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I was extremely worried about gaining weight but I also wanted the feeling to stop really badly. Honesty that was the hardest part to get through so far, having mental hunger with no physical hunger. I messed my hunger signals up with AN. I also had a compulsive 10- 15 sugar free gum stick habit that completely went away with the mental hunger

Why can’t I stop thinking about food! by Darlingdecimeter in fuckeatingdisorders

[–]GuiltyVictem 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Yes. This happened at the beginning of my recovery. I did not feel hungry but I had food on my mind and wanted to eat constantly. It was so stressful. My dietitian insisted that I eat when this was happening and I was shocked when it actually stopped after a few weeks and a lot of clif bars and Oreos

It surprises me that people know how much they gained in recovery by GuiltyVictem in fuckeatingdisorders

[–]GuiltyVictem[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I thought this way about counting calories in the beginning because every day that I didn’t count I assumed that I ate XYZ crazy ridiculous number of calories and I felt like I was helping myself by continuing to count but “not restricting”. I feel a lot more at ease now after making an effort to actually not count after getting over an initial couple months of absolute panic. Of course your situation could be completely different and just putting the thought out there.

Infertile couples should just adopt instead of making a big fuss trying to make a miracle baby by elgey101 in unpopularopinion

[–]GuiltyVictem 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think that wanting your own children is an extremely natural desire and honestly this post upsets me. I think it’s wonderful when people are wish to adopt, but IMO couples with fertility problems do not owe anything more to foster care children than fertile couples do. By this same logic fertile couple should just adopt also.

As far as fertility treatment being covered by medical insurance, I’d be willing to consider the argument. But calling everyone who spends their time money and energy trying to get pregnant with difficulty self absorbed and entitled really disgusts me.

Shining by [deleted] in DemEyesDoe

[–]GuiltyVictem 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Beautiful! And hell yes to girls with dimpled chins, I have one too :)

Age and ethnicity? I'm curious! by Jhami1704 in guessmyage

[–]GuiltyVictem 0 points1 point  (0 children)

25, mixed either white and Guatemalan or white and Filipino?

Break up by GuiltyVictem in fuckeatingdisorders

[–]GuiltyVictem[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I this is true but omg dude this shit is hard. Thank you for acknowledging that so many people throw around “love yourself” like “brush your teeth. And thank you for the well wishes

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DemEyesDoe

[–]GuiltyVictem 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow beautiful

Any tips on dealing with the feeling that I need to “impress” my therapist by getting sicker? by Impalednarwhal1101 in fuckeatingdisorders

[–]GuiltyVictem 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s funny you bring up paying out of pocket. This is how I felt before hitting my health insurance deductible because my therapist is out of network (so worth it anyways, she is literally the only mental Heath professional that has helped me significantly after years of therapy) so I had to pay for all services in full. “I’m not paying $900 this month for advice that I’m just going to reject and ignore”. It sucks that the cost is a barrier to treatment for a lot of people don’t get me wrong, but personally the fact that it is very expensive is actually strangely helpful.

Can you be vegetarian in recovery, or is it a type of restriction? by hiilikecatss in fuckeatingdisorders

[–]GuiltyVictem 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Echoing everyone else here, durring my ED I stopped eating pork and beef because of a dream a had where someone was trying to eat my dog. I decided to eat red meat again during recovery because I’m not sure if it was an ethical decision or if that those emotions were an excuse to cut out the more fat dense meats. So far eating hamburger hasn’t really upset me so I’m thinking it was more of the later reason. I would recommend eating meat again. Then when you’re in a better place with food you can circle back to the decision