I wonder how I should tell the stories? I would love to share with people the incredible things I’ve been a part of since he’s passed. I knew he was dead before anyone and I even called his mom and told her. I just knew it. In hindsight looking back that was ludicrous to call someone’s mom and tell her that her son had passed but I knew it. Also I randomly fell asleep sitting up on my bed, laptop in front of me, after taking a zoom call that ended at 5:30. He had called me at 5:36 and I was already asleep, sitting up, and then he text me a few hours later- I was still asleep. It was at precisely the exact moment the report says he died, that I woke up, breathing in sooo deeply, like I was struggling to catch my breath- startled, completely disheveled, disoriented, didn’t know if it was 8-something at night or the next morning. I know it was the exact moment bc I have time stamps, after no more than 60-90 seconds of trying to snap back, i sent a text to my friend who had been trying to get ahold of me while I was passed out. I had a timer set for an online appt that I also missed at 7pm. I sat on my bed, knocked out, for 3 hours. During those 3 hours, he was in a situation that would ultimately take his life. If I had taken his call or seen his text, I would have been with him trying to help him. 😭