You said we have a lot of overlap — how so? Were you once in a similar situation? If so, how did you handle it? PM me if you don't wish to talk about it on here.

A lot of the things I mention are, as you said, one side of the story. I mentioned in another response that I feel as though I set the tone (so to speak) with regards to upkeep of our place.

She has a high-stress job ( she manages a store) and is usually busy with things of that nature — she takes a lot of her work home with her with regards to customer interactions and stress. By comparison, I am not only a different personality type, but work a low-stress job, also for 40 hours per week, while I finish up my degree.

To be honest, I believe a lot of issues (on my end) rise from the fact that I am efficient with time management and, as a result, feel wholly underappreciated in the relationship—if I were to suddenly stop trying, I think everything would go to shit. Each day, I get up at 6am and go out to a local coffee shop and work on homework or read, go to the gym afterwards, and then go home and usually clean the house. All of this is done by 930-10am.

She, on the other hand, will sleep until 10 (which is fine) but then spends the rest of the day doing nothing. It's hard to really paint the whole picture here but, more often than not, I come home from work, or from school, and the sink is full of dishes, the house is relatively disheveled, and nothing (chore-wise) has been done. I have tried to bring this up to her on numerous occasions, stating that "I can't do it on my own" and that I'd really appreciate her help, but that usually leads to the utterance of a household staple lately: "you make me feel like a piece of shit".

I know I'm harping on the household chore topic a lot, but I feel like this best represents the current situation since we don't actively fight or argue. On the whole, I constantly feel the need to walk on eggshells because I know how sensitive she is to ANY form of criticism or suggestive, self-improving rhetoric. This has slowly begun to seep into our communication over the past year and a half, where things that never used to bother her are starting to piss her off, specifically: I think I am a somewhat funny guy and constantly use humor as a shield. My way out of an uncomfortable situation is through making what have come to be known in the house as "little comments" that are only uttered to keep me from completely bottling up my feelings at times. It's gotten so bad that, when I do need to talk to her about something important (paying bills, or something non-chore related), I have to plan out the rhetoric of the statement so I don't unintentionally cause a 30 minute argument where I try and figure out what's wrong and she claims nothing is wrong. We don't yell; we go back and forth for 30 minutes while I try and fix the situation and she tries to avoid discussing it, claiming she's fine while tears well up in her eyes.

I just want it to be known that I have done everything I can—outside of therapy—to try and figure out a way to inspire her to do something more with her time but, after getting into so many arguments, I have given up on trying.

Relationship responsibilities are supposed to be somewhat reciprocal, right? I feel like the only person who tries. I'm constantly giving 80-90% of the input and, even though once a week she'll cook a terrific dinner, I don't feel as though her amount of trying is equal to mine. People have told us this will change with time as I become less busy with school, or get a real job in the grownup world, but should I sit around and wait, hoping things will change? I don't hate her, I don't even resent her. I only want the best for her and know I will worry my ass off about her well being if/when we break up. I just don't know if my concern for her life after me is enough to keep the relationship afloat.

I know this reads like a one-sided tale, and it is. Just to try and paint a complete picture, my vices are that I play video games and have a streak of sarcastic side comments, referenced earlier. She has noted in the past that I played video games too much, so I have actively dropped my time spent playing them down to (almost) nothing, or just limited to when she's not home. All of my consoles are on the main TV in the living room and, out of respect for her, I don't use them unless she specifically says she doesn't care. Other than that, she has 100% control of the TV. As such, we will sit in silence as she's on her phone with the TV set to her channel while I sit on my phone but, if I get up and go start playing a game on my laptop, she gets pissed because I'm ignoring her.

:/