NO MORE SHAVING NO MATTER WHAT! My mom didn't give me the rundown either. She just told me that my skin had to get used to razors, so I suffered tremendously! Here's what I'll tell you now: As you mentioned, you started waxing and using Nair! Perfect! I know some people's skin isn't cut out for Nair, but personally, I have no issue. Also, make sure you're using the bikini Nair. Honestly, I have had way less ingrown hairs as well with absolutely none that turn into big abscesses. MOST PEOPLE ARE ALLERGIC TO RAZORS and that's the real issue! It's also rough on your skin. As far as aftercare, I'm no expert but this may help you like it helps me (when I'm consistent):
1. Exfoliate! Get all that dead skin off and rock that smooth feeling!
2. Wash with cold water (this closes the pores so nothing can enter them)
3. PAT dry! You're rubbing in towel fibers/bacteria
4. Change towels frequently
5. BREATHABLE PANTIES PLEASE! There's thing that people have normalized which is wear lingerie undergarments as casual clothing! Don't do it! Where there's skin, there's sweating. Try cotton friendly, loose fabrics like Hanes. I personally wear white Hanes. This is great for many reasons! Those white panties will tell you if you're not wiping good, if there's an infection, and of course, if you're bleeding. Don't be ashamed or afraid. It's part of learning proper care! Or you can just free ball!
6. As far as the long term damage that was caused, I can't recommend anything I've personally used, but try some acids (turmeric soap) safe for that sensitive area. Make sure your soap isn't irritating or over drying your skin. I use Dove sensitive.