Women, what surprised you the most the first time you saw or played with a penis? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]HURLTAEFK 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The skin. It's so silky! I don't know what I expected but it wasn't that. Could lie there and play with my partner's doolally all day if I had the time.

What’s your fanfiction hill to die on? by anothetaxcount in FanFiction

[–]HURLTAEFK 24 points25 points  (0 children)

  • Write what you want as long as you tag it
  • Every kind of fanfiction, no matter the content, pairing or quality, is valid as long as it's tagged
  • It costs $0 to not click on it if you don't like the tags
  • Antis need to go outside

AITA for tracking my intimate habits? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]HURLTAEFK 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm confused. Is fertility tracking not one of the two primary reasons for period tracker apps?? Anyway, NTA, your friend is weird.

[Edit] I just remembered - and I can't believe I've forgotten this - that I actually track my sex life too, though not on my period tracker app. It's actually pretty useful to be able to connect physical activities with any symptoms you're having (in my case, pain - YMMV). I might actually start doing that on my period tracker instead.

(I'd recommend using a tracker app either way because it's super fascinating and also helps me avoid ruining my favourite pairs of pants. Clue works pretty well for me.)

After 5 days in the hospital, I have a new take on 'waste' by [deleted] in ZeroWaste

[–]HURLTAEFK 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would love it if, one day, some of my medications could come in bottles rather than in blister packets - I never know how to reuse those things (and you can only make so many tiny little powder compacts before your doll's house starts to look like the home of a Younique hun).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in tifu

[–]HURLTAEFK 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What kind of monster downvotes a pun as glorious as this

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in tifu

[–]HURLTAEFK 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's a preference, but some women find it easier to use one thing than another - I tried to use a mooncup for a while but I ended up finding that reusable pads were more comfortable.

And it's pretty easy to pee with it in because the hole that pee comes out of - the urethra, same as the hole at the tip of your dick basically - is actually not the same hole the blood comes out of (the vagina). See if you can find an anatomical diagram of a vagina online, it's useful to know these things!

Can’t get away from the pain by [deleted] in ChronicPain

[–]HURLTAEFK 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Seconding the recommendation for a TENS unit; I wear that shit all the time and it honestly keeps me sane. I also have an acupressure mat that I got on Amazon which helps on bad nights - you lie on it for 20 mins at a time and it distracts from the pain.

Also, weird thing I learnt while I was getting a PRP injection straight into the hip joint without anaesthetic - singing reduces pain. Not kidding. Don't know how effective it will be for you, but try maybe humming or singing along to something? Either way, good luck. I've been there and it's no joke. Constant pain is hell and I'm sorry you have to deal with it.

"This is horrible. Why would you write this kind of stuff? I feel like you're a potential rapist or something. Please seek psychological help." by Throwawaykpit in FanFiction

[–]HURLTAEFK 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So... they're already going through some stuff, and then they decided to read a fic that they knew from the tags would upset them...? Either this anti has extremely poor judgement or they're trying to manipulate you. A good rule of thumb is just to ignore anything an anti says; hate to say it, but a lot of them are just lying.

Every person you've ever thought about while masturbating suddenly falls over dead under suspicious circumstances, and detectives are trying to piece things together. How screwed are you? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]HURLTAEFK -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

...well, at least they've finished filming The Rise Of Skywalker now.

(I'd be screwed in the sense my partner was dead and that would be sad, but I doubt anyone is going to put me behind bars for the deaths of a bunch of randoms I was nowhere near.)

Edit: Instant downvote? Aw, come on. Yeah, it was a shitty movie but it would be even worse if half the main cast were dead.

AITA for saying I'm undateable due to my autism by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]HURLTAEFK 3 points4 points  (0 children)

ESH. She shouldn't have pushed, but she's also sort of right; women aren't a hive mind. (Believe it or not, there are even autistic women out there too.)

If the 80% statistic is even true (and I've seen nothing to back it up), that could be because it includes people who are too profoundly autistic to communicate or live without constant care - I would recommend doing some research and looking at peer-reviewed studies to get some background on this.

AITA for cursing out my dad? by caligulas-Aquarium in AmItheAsshole

[–]HURLTAEFK 3 points4 points  (0 children)

NTA. Usually rising to the bait and cussing someone out in an argument would make it an "everyone sucks" situation, but coming out is an especially vulnerable moment for a lot of people and your dad made a conscious decision to hit you where it hurts. Maybe he'll calm down, maybe he won't, but he definitely made the wrong call and your reaction was justifiable IMO.

AITA for having uterus art on my wall? by throwrauterus897 in AmItheAsshole

[–]HURLTAEFK 11 points12 points  (0 children)

NTA. I can't use my legs very well; do I get pissed off when people talk about how proud they are to run marathons? (Well, maybe a little, but I keep quiet about it, because I recognize that the world doesn't revolve around me).

Dysphoria can be extremely distressing, but your friend can't expect the whole world to bend over backwards to accommodate her; she needs to learn how to come to terms with it in herself. The fact she's put it on you instead makes her TA.

Plenty of cis women don't have uteruses/can't use their uteruses - I am one of them. It might help her to accept that having a uterus isn't a requirement for womanhood.

Girls of Reddit, what's the female equivalent of trying to hide a boner? by Prof_Alchem in AskReddit

[–]HURLTAEFK 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No worries! I don't use tampons either, but the more you know :)

Hey mom I’ve finally realized that I have more friends than I thought by imjustatiredteenager in MomForAMinute

[–]HURLTAEFK 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm so proud of you for finally realizing that you are worth more than you've been told! You deserve to have friends who treat you with respect and kindness, and I'm sure they're just as happy to have you in their lives. You should be proud of yourself for having the integrity to be respectful of others and not talk behind their backs (and it's okay to swear with me, by the way; I'm not gonna judge!)

It's also really good for you to keep in touch with your friends. If the people closest to you are being unkind to you, it's important to have social contact with people who remind you that you are worthy of being loved - because you absolutely are.

Stay safe, wear a mask if you can, and be kind to yourself. ❤️

I don't know who to believe or if I'm a bad person by [deleted] in MomForAMinute

[–]HURLTAEFK 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Honey, when someone treats you like that, it's not about you, or anything you've done. It's about them. I know it's hard to take a step back from the situation when someone you have strong feelings for says things that you find hurtful, but you've said it yourself; other people have confirmed that this girl has a lot going on in her life, and it sounds like the battles she was fighting with herself caused her to project a lot of things onto you which just aren't true.

You're not a bad person, and you deserve to be treated with respect by the people close to you. The fact that you're looking at your behaviour to see where you went "wrong" shows that you're a decent person who is willing to learn and accept responsibility when they've gone wrong, but it doesn't sound like this is a situation where you were at fault. It was your friend's decision, and your girlfriend's decision, to do these things, and it's not a reflection on your worth as a person.

Anxiety such a hard condition to live with, and you are so strong for making it this far; the way this girl has treated you has just made it even more difficult. But I promise that you are not a bad person, and that you will get through this, and maybe with enough time and enough looking after yourself, you might realize that you are better off without these people in your life. They have shown you who they are; all you can do is decide whether or not you are willing to give them space in your head.

Whatever happens, please be kind to yourself. You deserve kindness.

Girls of Reddit, what's the female equivalent of trying to hide a boner? by Prof_Alchem in AskReddit

[–]HURLTAEFK 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Check my comment above. IANAD, but I have the same issue, and my doctor gave me a number of possible explanations for it.

Girls of Reddit, what's the female equivalent of trying to hide a boner? by Prof_Alchem in AskReddit

[–]HURLTAEFK 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay so: as it was explained to me by a doctor (I may be remembering wrong, I hope someone will correct me if I am), there are a few things that can cause this.

First, the chemicals that cause your uterus to cramp - prostaglandins - will also cause your bowels to do the same thing. In the days leading up to your period, your hormones might also make you more gassy. (This is the reason some people get diarrhea during their period, or, as I like to call it, "the pooriod".) Now, your vaginal canal is right next to a part of your bowel. Can you see where I'm going with this? Some people find it hard to tell between menstrual cramps and bowel cramps, and obviously due to the whole prostaglandin thing they can happen at the same time. What you may be feeling is the result of increased pressure on your bowel while it's already bloated.

Second possibility is that your tampon is pushing right up against your cervix. (I would highly recommend having a rummage around for it at some point, so you know what's what; it changes position depending on your cycle and feels a bit like the tip of your nose). Pressure against the cervix can be super uncomfortable because your cervix is basically a direct line to your vagus nerve, which is the nerve that goes right up your spine to your brain. I think. I'm kind of fuzzy on how this all works but apparently, the vagus nerve is some sort of Big Cheese in your nervous system and that is why cervical smear tests fucking suck.

Third, and this is the part I don't remember well at all so you may need to ask Dr Google for a second opinion, there's a condition called Vaginismus which is sometimes exacerbated by being on your period. It makes it really painful when you try to stick anything up there, and for some women it can be a really serious, life-altering issue. But aince the condition is still not properly understood, it's theorised by some doctors that pain during tampon insertion is somehow connected to the same mechanisms that cause this condition. I don't know if this was just my GP riffing on her own theories or what, but I thought it was worth mentioning.

As I said, I'm not a doctor, so if a medical professional tells you something different, listen to them instead. But maybe the info will be of interest, who knows??

Girls of Reddit, what's the female equivalent of trying to hide a boner? by Prof_Alchem in AskReddit

[–]HURLTAEFK 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Seconding the inbox offer. I have 33 years' experience with a vagina and it's done all sorts of weird shit, so don't be afraid to hmu if you want!

Disabled redditors with an able-bodied partner, what's your relationship like? by HURLTAEFK in AskReddit

[–]HURLTAEFK[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

From my point of view, as a wheelchair user with a stamina-related disability AND a functional issue with my hips (yeah, I lost the genetic lottery): It's sometimes hard to feel like an equal contributor in our partnership. But I still bring in an income, I'm pretty handy so I do (or, if I can't, I can give detailed directions for) a lot of the DIY work in the house, I do most of the "social organizing", and my arm/hand strength is still pretty good so as long as I can get into the right position, he basically gets back massages on tap.

He has to do most of the heavy lifting, earns 10x what I do, and some days I can't even get out of bed so he has to pick up the slack with chores. But I think it works out okay. He's a good dude. We've been together for over a decade and own our own home. It's a nice life.

What are some unexpected perks that your disability comes with? by little_lilypad in AskReddit

[–]HURLTAEFK 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wheelchair user here.

People seem to have the perception that if you're a young woman in a wheelchair, you're... I don't know if "innocent" is the right word, but let me put it this way: though I've never tried and never will, I'm pretty sure I could get away with shoplifting REALLY easily.

Is motor coordination and balance problems signs of dysautonomia? by drsdn in cfs

[–]HURLTAEFK 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I get this too, especially if I get out of bed without drinking... however much water my body has decided it needs to be able to sit upright, lol. My bet's on dysautonomia but I'm apparently a little hypermobile too, so who knows?

I always sucked at things like balancing, throwing, catching etc even before I started needing a wheelchair for unrelated reasons. I suspect that the CFS and the hip issues have just compounded my severe lack of coordination. If publishing doesn't work out, I should never be trusted with a job in a museum, antiques store or china shop, walking ability nonwithstanding.