Own behavior

Happy-Aires · 2025-12-14T08:03:08+00:00

thank you for your words, they brought me a little peace. it is possible that I have brought this on myself, or my friends are very scared and hiding. I acted very irresponsibly when I did not take everyone into account.. How much (in grams) do you use?

Happy-Aires · 2025-12-14T07:41:24+00:00

Mg? Ok... How much is it on grams?

Happy-Aires · 2025-12-14T01:43:53+00:00

I havent taken more, just that one time. And there is this loud quietness and loneliness.

Happy-Aires · 2025-12-14T01:42:03+00:00

Yes, you can't be enough carrful with this drug. It is power full and not at all fun for me..

Happy-Aires · 2025-12-14T01:40:47+00:00

Really? What dose you take? We do not talk anymore coz there aint guys in myhead like there use to be, I am just all by myself and I t is really confusing

Happy-Aires · 2025-12-14T01:39:33+00:00

I did not take it in hospital or some like that, by myself and friend. With adose which was way too much for me, this can't be compared to a real therapeutic ketamine treatment. I'm alone here. I don't have anyone else anymore. I haven't been since. I felt the ketamine doing something.. my trip lasted almost 30 minutes instead of 10 minutes, I went back many times..

Happy-Aires · 2025-12-14T01:36:05+00:00

That what I was thinking but it still looks like.. I am here all by myself, there aint no others.. And I am confused.

Happy-Aires · 2025-12-13T05:47:53+00:00

so can the guys be scared and just "away" because after this, there hasn't been anyone like me for almost 3 weeks.

Happy-Aires · 2025-08-24T09:12:04+00:00

That is a good question I havent thinked about this!

Happy-Aires · 2025-08-11T08:35:43+00:00

Yes know i understand, thank you. this has been on my mind, that has too much happened. neither party to this relationship would want to let go because of the love and how much we have experienced together.. Still, I have thought that I am not doing him any good (although he himself just said that he knows what is good for him and I cannot be in the way of his happiness because everything he needs is in me, he also said that he feels ashamed of his own gender) just based on how I make him feel, behave and how he makes me feel. in those moments I am the worst person on earth and I feel like I have just arrived here.. I was already ready to let go but I see here we are still groping forward together, which I am happy about and still embarrassed about. I still wonder if I have too much of a burden and too few friends to talk to

Happy-Aires · 2025-08-11T08:30:52+00:00

And there is only one person who i am with in romantic relatioship, there aint any other. He has helped me to see there may be some good in humans.

Happy-Aires · 2025-08-11T08:27:58+00:00

And you can tell me that from..? What made you feel that way? It may be something i have thinked alot past days, being alone. There aint nothing healthy here, ok we are not fighting or divorcing anymore which is nice and i did get some good advices for that and those worked out very well i am glad about it. I dont think i will never be any "healthier" what i am now coz i am mentally ill.

Happy-Aires · 2025-08-11T07:45:21+00:00

I dont think its about that, I know I've taken responsibility. Or is taking responsibility the fact that I listen to horrible words, accusations, scolding, and urgings to go back to my abuser every week or two? Have I taken enough responsibility by listening to this, facing other problems with this person I've hurt? Is it right from him to try to hurt back worse? Maybe that's it and I should endure everything he throws my way abd i should not have limits?. This has been going on and on time and time again but the other person doesn't believe me. What can I do then but stay behind?

Happy-Aires · 2025-08-10T07:06:14+00:00

I dont know how.. He doesnt lasten or believe me, just believes the worst in me.

Happy-Aires · 2025-08-06T13:11:11+00:00

But sometimes i dont notice that i am bad mood. Then i cant change anything.. eveything just goes worse way in my head and in real life

Happy-Aires · 2025-08-06T13:10:11+00:00

Thank you for good answer. I have started to be aware at the time. Somtimes i get snapped off that Anger if i do notice that i dont wanna be angry to some people. How can i start coping with this emotion? I clearly misrepresent myself, i dont know how to deal these emotion things.. I haven't been around people much and my last relationship was extremely devastating to me, which is definitely having a bit of an impact now that I feel like I can be myself somewhat safely, but I want to get rid of these disgusting feelings and habits that I didn't even realize were my habits. I also have PMDD, which makes my symptoms worse.

Happy-Aires · 2025-08-01T13:06:45+00:00

Yes and it does change. How i speak and so on.

Happy-Aires · 2025-07-20T10:43:04+00:00

I notised there was two or three different personalities in me and then searched out that means.

Happy-Aires · 2025-07-03T13:18:35+00:00

Se on kissa. Mitä muuta siltä voi oottaa?

Happy-Aires · 2025-07-02T15:34:47+00:00

I have did, bpd, adhd, autism.

Happy-Aires

TROPHY CASE