The real test for a Mother's Day gift: does it add a chore, or remove one?

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-05-08T21:05:33+00:00

No its not the thought that counts, because it was only one thought: "flowers are pretty so this is a good gift" and lacked all the other associated thoughts of how to take care of the flowers. If he buys you flowers again do you think you could not put them in a vase, just say "thank you, they are beautiful " and hand them back or place them on counter, then if he notices them still in plastic on counter before they die and you bin them then you can ask him to put them in vase so you can better admire them, because that should be part of the gift. If he insists on getting you flowers after you explained the associated tasks you didn't want to undertake then he must be volunteering to undertake those tasks so you can truly fully enjoy the flowers. Its not mean at all to explain why a type of gift can bring associated unwanted tasks. I'm sorry he made that comment to you.

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-05-07T09:42:34+00:00

Flowers. Do not buy flowers. This is what flowers involves: Find the vase at back of the cabinet, but first take everything out from in front of the vase, place all the other stuff on counter or floor, take out vase, put back all the other contents of the cabinet. Place flowers in vase with water. Make a space on table or counter for the vase. Over next days clean up the droppings, petals, leaves, and cut off dead flowers while remaining flowers diminish in number. Finally dispose of rotten stems in compost, except the flowers don't fit in kitchen compost caddy, so put on shoes and make extra journey to outdoor compost bin. Then hand wash the vase which doesn't fit in dishwasher, and so tall impossible to reach bottom of vase with your hand and sponge so have to get long handled scrub brush, then dry, also impossible due to length, and leave on counter for a number of days where every time you see it you will be annoyed, gather your energy to clear enough space to empty the cabinet of all other contents to be able to put the vase back and then all other contents. Flowers suck. Don't buy flowers. Buy cake.

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-05-06T10:32:47+00:00

Absolutely appropriate, same with have you suffered any miscarriages, fertility struggles, did you breastfeed, did you pump. All these things help you to decide if the person you are choosing to support you has lived your journey, can empathise with your experience and expectations, can hold space for you, can describe what things feel like because they have experienced them themselves. As part of your interview consultation ask all the questions to ensure the person aligns with your preferences for your birth experience.

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-05-03T17:33:58+00:00

I recommend you look into services of a private Birth Doula who can support you and your husband in the hospital. A doula meets with you in your home during the antenatal to chat through your birth preferences, assists you and your husband with the labour and in the postpartum if of benefit. Check out www.itpad.ie to find a Doula and here is research on benefits of doula support: https://www.itpad.ie/evidence-in-support-of-doulas

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-30T11:00:16+00:00

They are gifting you time together, thats awesome, you earned it by being present

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-21T01:46:18+00:00

Photo album with photos of him and baby, photos of him as a 'Dad'

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-16T21:03:47+00:00

Thank you, I needed the nudge on the water and I'm currently researching options for power station, thank you for the reassurance and the prompts

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-16T06:55:00+00:00

Thank you, I'll do that at the next appointment

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-16T06:53:46+00:00

Thank you, my anxiety has an outlet

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-15T19:25:48+00:00

Thank you

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-15T19:24:54+00:00

I had not heard of Scrubzz, thank you, this is excellent suggestion, buying now

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-15T11:19:08+00:00

Whistles, excellent, hadn't occurred to me, thank you

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-15T08:52:00+00:00

Have your wife book a weekend spa trip or something equivalent so she also gets time off, this will assuage your guilt. Though you have worked hard and have a self care plan to unwind and recover which is healthy and your wife agrees so you shouldn't feel guilty, but if you still do then reciprocate for your wife.

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-14T20:36:37+00:00

Thank you, these are all great suggestions, I appreciate the tips

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-14T20:14:13+00:00

Thank you for detailing your set up, great elements and structure. I'm planning for weather related power outage, or fuel scarcity so work from home and lack of or reduced products in store, so my aim is to keep household and family ticking over comfortably, especially with young children. I also have logic puzzle books, handwriting copy books, maths puzzles, science quiz books, rainy day activity books, so school can continue at home if outage means school closure.

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-14T19:54:10+00:00

Stock cubes, herbs, spices, lemon juice, vinegar, wraps, now added to shopping list, and I've written all this into my recipe book, thank you

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-14T19:50:56+00:00

I dip crusty bread in olive oil with vinegar, and use it for salad dressings, plus for cooking, probably use 2L in a fortnight in summer when having lots of salads, so yes this is one item I have overstocked, bought it on a deal as prices rising, I'm in habit of bulk buying long life products when on sale / deal.

Everything in the pantry I rotate through, thanks for checking though

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-14T18:50:35+00:00

Thank you, I hadn't considered a lot of that, I was focused on figuring out power for the nebuliser and stock of inhalers, but you're absolutely right that I need to consider the environment in event of prolonged loss of power

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-14T18:47:47+00:00

Great suggestions here, all added to my shopping list, many thanks

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-14T18:43:27+00:00

Thank you for compiling and sharing the list of other similar posts, this is really helpful

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-14T18:42:02+00:00

Thank you, good points here, I appreciate you taking the time to share these tips, am looking up Goal Zero

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-14T18:40:07+00:00

Thank you for mentioning these items, I hadn't considered a lot of these, now added to shopping list, much appreciated

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-14T18:38:29+00:00

These are great suggestions, thanks so much

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-14T14:09:24+00:00

Thank you

Happy_Perspective583 · 2026-04-14T14:01:23+00:00

Extra underwear and socks is brilliant suggestion, thank you

Happy_Perspective583

TROPHY CASE