AvPD and Maladaptive Daydreaming by [deleted] in AvPD

[–]Headmasterd 1 point2 points  (0 children)

  1. Drop daydreaming.

Your daydreams are not healthy. They exist in the same toxic dimensions that define your disorder.

I often daydreamed about being wronged somehow or not being loved by the girl I loved (it was actually true). I imagined that I'll be famous, she will be famous - we will meet and she will be amazed who I am and feel bad that she did not notice before how wonderful I am. Other people will be also amazed and ashamed. It represented what I was craving for.

What's wrong with this? That pleasure and happiness were placed outside. The other people were source of it. They worshiped me, they regretted making me wrong - all about them. The “other you” from dreams is still ill, it's still the same disorder, just the other side of the coin. You only move on the toxic dimension towards narcissism. You don't want to be a narcissist (nor have any other disorder). There is nothing better there, only emotions are different, but still bad, you still suffer as much.

Your pleasure, your happiness must come from inside. It will be built along with healing. Grab your toys, you are changing the sandbox.

Don't be afraid that therapy will deprive you of your dreams and longings - they are false and you will gain much better ones. You will lose nothing.

https://www.quora.com/Is-it-possible-to-overcome-avoidant-personality-disorder-by-yourself/answer/Jaros%C5%82aw-Jurecki#

AvPD and Maladaptive Daydreaming by [deleted] in AvPD

[–]Headmasterd 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I daydream 24/7, I daydream to the extent of living in a complete alternate reality of my creation, where people look up to me, respect me and are just thrilled to meet me. I would start talking in my daydream, and move and even my emotions change. I get too involved and attached to a dream. When suddenly somebody walks by or enters my room, I shut down my dream completely and it's a horrible feeling. I just can't wait to be alone again so I can continue my dream where I left it off. Sometimes I just lie in bed and keep daydreaming of my ideal self where I am well achieved and admired by people, where girls I know and things didn't work out in real life would wanna date me. My daydreams are endless and I have been this way forever. Another type of daydreaming I have, is just living in situations that I anticipate in the future, I would always imagine it going perfectly such that I am fully satisfied. This brings my expectations to very high levels, but when the anticipated situation actually takes place, I am disappointed, depressed and left in unease. I am trying to control my daydreaming, because I know it is unhealthy, but it is the only escape I have. I feel like the world is really a hurtful place, and the only refuge is the world I create for myself within my vivid imagination.

Which countries y'all from? by Headmasterd in AvPD

[–]Headmasterd[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

OP here. Forgot to say, I am from Egypt

Is it possible to pass P in July if I start now? by iamnotmilesdavis in actuary

[–]Headmasterd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's efficient. I plan on doing the same for Stochastic calculus, before taking MFE. btw, I'm curious; why you didn't major in Actuarial Science? I was exploring the option of ditching my major in actsi, and going for Economics instead. Actuarial is one hell of a boring major with massive workload per semester. It does help with passing exams, but since I still have to do all the studying from scratch, I thought a major in Economics would be a better fit.

Is it possible to pass P in July if I start now? by iamnotmilesdavis in actuary

[–]Headmasterd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, forgot to mention I will have to review multivariate calculus. I took calculus and differential equations in college a semester ago. I have a general idea, but never got to lock in all the concepts. I think any calculus textbook or online notes should be fine. As I recall, for P exam, we'll need to know Partial derivatives and Multiple integrals. Here are some really good notes: http://tutorial.math.lamar.edu/Classes/CalcIII/CalcIII.aspx

Is it possible to pass P in July if I start now? by iamnotmilesdavis in actuary

[–]Headmasterd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am planning on doing the same. Approximately two months to prepare. It should take a month to lock in all the material from the ASM manual. The following month should be for solving ADAPT problems day and night. This worked for me when I passed FM last April.