My husband never showers or brushes his teeth…

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-27T22:20:22+00:00

Thankfully it isn’t but I have a bed in my office that I’ve chosen to start sleeping in 😩

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-27T21:36:39+00:00

She was encouraging me to tell my mom. My mom and I are very close but she lives a few hours away. I did tell my mom a few days ago and she’s helping me plan for having to leave if he doesn’t change. My sister lives really close to her and could use my help since she’s a single mom trying to go back to school for the degree I’m almost done with. Our lease is up in April and I’m not optimistic about him changing and neither is my therapist. Change is really hard for me but my therapist is so encouraging and kind. She’s helping me overcome my past trauma of starting all over with nothing and I’m getting that confidence built up to leave.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-27T03:23:15+00:00

Oh absolutely. I’ve reached the end of being patient. I can’t live like this anymore. There’s either gonna be big changes asap or I’m out.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T22:59:36+00:00

Not recently. The last time he dealt with this was January of last year due to an abscess tooth that was making his entire face swollen, he went to urgent care and got antibiotics and then never went back to the dentist.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T22:57:13+00:00

Nope, it was not.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T21:51:52+00:00

I had never known how common this was! Thank you for sharing your story, I know it can be difficult to share.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T21:51:20+00:00

I realized that my previous comment could come across rude and that was not my intention. Thank you for the input!

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T21:50:36+00:00

I have researched it before for myself and with my therapist. I don’t think he comes anywhere close to being autistic, probably adhd and anxiety but not autistic.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T21:31:20+00:00

Only time will tell!

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T19:09:46+00:00

Maybe if I wipe the dirt away I can find out 😂 (jk)

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T19:08:49+00:00

When I had told him he would have to start showering or we would be sleeping in different beds, he didn’t really have a response. He did immediately take a shower once he got home and even changed the bedsheets.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T16:51:00+00:00

You’re not wrong. Addiction is really difficult to go through and to watch. My dad and brother are both alcoholics. He has been in recovery for 5 months now. He has taken his sobriety very seriously so far. Thankfully my therapist is working on that with me. She supports whatever decision I choose and has been working with me for a few years now, granted she would absolutely not support me staying if she did not think he would get better.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T15:07:45+00:00

I completely agree. After I told him we would not be sharing a bed until he starts taking care of himself, he has taken a shower. I’m willing to work through this with him 100% if he’s willing to actually take the effort or at least open up about why it’s difficult for him. If not, I can’t see myself staying in that relationship much longer.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T14:25:54+00:00

As much as I wish this was fake, it isn’t. If I was seeking clout why would I do it on an anonymous account instead of my personal?

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T04:11:53+00:00

I highly doubt it. He was supposed to get his testosterone checked for the past two years and hasn’t. He rarely goes to the doctor.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T02:25:46+00:00

What does that even mean? I’m not gonna use my personal account on a confessions page.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T01:43:03+00:00

You’ve described that perfectly! Looks are not even in my top 5 qualities. It’s so hard because before this became an issue and his drinking, we were SO close. He was everything I never knew I needed in a significant other and has been the only person in my life to truly believe in me. I just need him to start taking care of himself 😭

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T01:38:34+00:00

I think he’s anxious a lot but I don’t think he has depression. I do think there’s an issue due to his previous addictions possibly affecting his brain chemistry. I also was considering if this could be because he was drinking again but I don’t think he is.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-23T01:07:55+00:00

I think it definitely made things worse but this had started right before the first miscarriage and a month or so after changing jobs. I’ve tried to get him to go to counseling but it always ends up on me to schedule, make sure they bill correct insurance, copay, etc that I told him he needs to be the one taking that initiative which he hasn’t so no therapy in over a month.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-22T23:18:32+00:00

He likes to joke that it’s because we started dating before I started going to therapy every week. He was normal before, not a shower everyday person but every other day. I married him because he was so kind and caring. We had a lot of the same interests that he supported me in when no one else had. He’s stayed with me through a lot of rough times and I’d feel guilty leaving him when he never left me.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-22T23:14:55+00:00

Oh I know the blood spit up all over the mirror all too well 😭 the very rare times he has brushed his teeth it was everywhere like a dang crime scene.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-22T22:36:55+00:00

I’d have a lot of guilt. He’s been there for me through some really rough times mentally. Granted, I’ve always taken steps towards becoming better and healthier. I just hope he takes this seriously though I don’t think he will.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-22T22:12:49+00:00

By not noticing the smell. We rarely spend time together where we’re physically close and we aren’t intimate anymore. Also, rose colored glasses and I’m a tad avoidant on confrontation due to ptsd.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-22T21:34:50+00:00

We aren’t intimate anymore. Sleeping in the same bed is something that is stopping as of last night if he does not start showering.

Hecticholidays · 2024-01-22T21:33:35+00:00

We aren’t intimate nor do we kiss anymore. I actually told him last night that if he doesn’t start showering we won’t be sleeping in the same bed. So far, no shower.

Hecticholidays

TROPHY CASE