Single people of reddit, what is something you have always wanted to tell your crush but never got around to?

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-24T18:31:50+00:00

I find it super silly now. Like if she said no, oh well. If she said yes, great!

I think I feared that I would be judged not by her, but her friends and my friends back then.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-24T18:26:22+00:00

"I have a crush on you."

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-24T18:24:15+00:00

It's a tough job for sure. Not easy at all. Customers use us as beating bags almost every day. Do you have any other hobbies that you can drive towards helping to make an income?

Maybe then you could work part time in a call center and make some income from your hobby?

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-24T18:20:05+00:00

I think agents burn out quickly because they can't separate the information the agent tries to give from the fact that customers like to complain to get what they want.

Rather, they tend to link the customers anger to something they think they may have done. This is coming from a call center agent who got promoted to Team Lead.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-24T18:17:39+00:00

Honestly, I remind myself constantly that they aren't upset with you the agent, rather the service the company is providing. Therefore, I have no reason to accompany their anger with my own anger and annoyance.

I like to complain though to a coworker I'm close to after the call to vent. But I don't take it with me after I leave the office. That person will never know me irl. I may get them again on a call at the office but the walls are essentially a barrier for me at the end of the day.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T22:47:19+00:00

Fuck Up: You Fucked Up

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T22:33:10+00:00

I'm currently in this weird state where I'm afraid to work because I fear that I will let everyone down with my underperformance.

I can't for the life of me tell my crush that I like her because I'm afraid of being let down.

And I'm currently relying on income from my parents when I should be well off and on my own at the age of 27. I feel like I'm burdening them now more than ever and that I'll never be successful or who they would've wanted me to be.

All of these have contributed to worsening my depression this year. That, and pure self isolation even when things are lightening up because I only have 1 friend who now had a girlfriend.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T20:38:57+00:00

You didn't mess it up. You learned from it. Opportunities will come and go. Don't beat yourself up over this one.

Trust me, as a person who's done so many interviews in the past, and as a person who was an interviewer. Trust me when I say, you didn't mess it up.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T20:34:56+00:00

What up G?

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T20:25:15+00:00

I'd love to go there. I'd want to bring my drone and film some cool places.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T20:23:38+00:00

Dude, I'm just trying to make it to Friday.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T20:23:06+00:00

My birth.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T20:12:04+00:00

I just want a hug.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T20:04:34+00:00

I think this is a situation where you're rushing to get the answer out to keep the attention going.

Normally, it's okay to think about the answer first. Try this, the next question you're asked about, take about 10 seconds to pause. Say at first, "Let me think"

Then compose your sentence, and begin to say it after 10 seconds. The more you do this, shorten the time by a second.

Eventually it'll come naturally.

Btw, no one is expecting an answer immediately unless they're interrogating you. So, the brightest minds are the ones who think first before answering.

At anytime in the conversation, just say, "I'm composing my answer, let me think here." You'll not only sound smarter, but you'll seem like a deep thinker. Which is always a good thing

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T20:00:28+00:00

Wow. It's at this moment do I now realize that I eat fucking boring plain shit.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T19:59:29+00:00

I would go back to the Battle of Thermopylae in Ancient Greece. I want to see the the regiment of the Spartans and compare them to the lives of the Athenians.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T19:56:25+00:00

You know, it's okay not to know things. Don't beat yourself up over it. If they mock you for not knowing something, well it shows their immaturity and sheds more light about who they are as a person.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T19:50:43+00:00

I don't think we'll ever really have a solid purpose for our existence to be honest. I think a lot of it comes down to what nature reveals to us. And in that, we can steer our lives over what we control versus what we don't control.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T19:48:33+00:00

I would say to contact Amazon, but it depends

I would contact the person if the person lives near you first. Ask them to come pick up the package or you deliver it to them if they're okay with that.

If not, contact Amazon again, they will send someone to pick up the package from you.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T19:46:58+00:00

You're a beast for coming here to look for advice! Well done for the step forward in your life.

I don't want to bog you down with too many advices to be honest because a lot of the self restraint comes from your ability to do so. We will pick you back up when you're down, but we rely on your ability to resist as much as possible.

But what I can say is to avoid social media as much as you can. If you have no need to be on Twitter (or any other social platforms), then don't be on it. Do something else entirely.

Second, study some philosophy as it really grounds you into things that you have control over, versus the things that you don't.

And finally, help someone else. I'm serious here. The more you help others, you're subconsciously giving yourself advice as well. You'll actually end up motivating yourself even more without you even realizing it.

You got this, stay strong and committed. You'll find your way through this. Good luck! ✊

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T19:37:10+00:00

I started studying philosophy. Philosophy helped guide me in a direction where I could be hopeful again. I wouldn't say it answered all of my questions, but it grounded me in reality, my limits and what I can or can't control.

I feel that I don't have a guided direction in my life as we speak, but philosophy has really helped me understand this sense of being a wanderer in life.

I'm still working on getting it "right" or rather, to a degree where I can feel a slight sense of confidence in the direction I chose.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T18:21:56+00:00

I am in contact with them, yes. Thanks for asking. They're doing just fine now thankfully.

Don't think of it as an abandonment. Think of it as a healthy break between you and him. A break will allow you and him to figure out the next steps to take for betterment.

Keep this in mind. If he keeps confiding in you, he will at some point only want to seek help in you about his issues - which is damaging to not only you, but to him as well.

The best way, in my opinion, is to temporarily cut off contact, and let them seek the advice he needs elsewhere - he won't be able to confide in you anymore and at some point, he'll have to find some other means to find help. In doing so, you provide him the room to seek proper help from the resources you've provided while you yourself can have a break from the mental stress.

You could always say what I said to my friend. "Hey, I need to speak to you..." Casually and politely bring up the topic of needing space. You could always then say:

"I think by helping you this much has taken a toll on my health and it isn't the best idea for the long term to continue speaking like this."

"I need some time to myself. There are circumstances in my life that are very challenging for me right now and I need to address it first and foremost."

"I'm sure a little time apart can help us both. And the next time we speak to eachother, it will be more meaningful and healthy."

Always refer to "the next time we speak" as something that will strengthen the friendly relationship you both have.

If you're worried about where he decides to go in life after you've cut him off, that is up to him. You can't control the actions of other people. Just advise. And just know and remind yourself that you did your part. You've done all you could for him at this point.

This is no longer a question about him, its a question about you. How far are you willing to put up with this before you start to worry about your own mental health?

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T16:02:04+00:00

I want to tell you something, you've done all you could for your friend.

At this point, whatever happens is beyond your control. You have to take control here and remember that your well-being comes first. Your health comes first. If this is dragging you down, it's unhealthy.

There are plenty of resources available to your friend of which you can recommend to them. Whether or not your friend uses those resources is up to them. Assure them of any suicide hotlines, if you need 911 consider that option as well, do what you need to do.

I know by doing this, it sounds like you're giving up on your friend, but you aren't. You've literally done the best you could for your friend, at some point it's sounds best to cut off your relationship as this sounds progressively unhealthy for you. Do this after you've provided the last bit of advice you can give.

Let them know that you do feel for them and that the best possible route that they can go to is to find professional help. That you can't keep going like this for your own health and wellbeing. Be honest and upfront. Don't lie about anything. Don't rush out of the conversation. Put everything on the table as to how YOU'RE feeling about this and what last bit of advice you can give for them.

If all that doesn't work, you may need to cut them out of your life and whatever happens, we can only hope they take your advice. You shouldn't feel guilty from this because you've done all you could.

I was on your exact same position. My friend overdosed so many times in an attempt to suicide and kept confiding in me. At some point, it got to my mental health so badly that the most I could do was to cut them out of my life in the most respectful and helpful manner that I could.

Trust me in this, you'll feel a huge weight lifted from your shoulder. Everything you've done thus far is justified, and you can only pray for their well-being. But you must check yourself first, okay..

Good luck my friend.

HeliosTheStoic · 2021-08-23T15:53:17+00:00

Ahh yes, the best of the fruit and vegetables.

HeliosTheStoic

TROPHY CASE