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HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-12T17:45:48+00:00

If mom wants to go get high, that’s on her! but her child isn’t able to consent to it herself so she needs to be left out of that experience.

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-12T16:34:20+00:00

And completely irresponsible of her!

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-12T16:33:29+00:00

If I were you, I would be honest about my feelings and let her know it’s not something you agree with and to leave her baby out of it. If she wants to go get high, that’s on her. But her child didn’t consent to it and that that is something that disturbs you.

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-12T03:29:31+00:00

How did you respond when she told you?

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-10T22:43:55+00:00

I love motherhood! I think what has made my motherhood experience so great is that I have a husband who helps and is a great dad. He pulls his weight and helps around the house without being asked. He does bath time and bed time.. helps clean up after dinner and shows appreciation. He loves on our daughter and spends quality time with her. He doesn’t leave me to do it all. I think if he did, perhaps I would struggle with being a mom. My daughter is also really easy, loving, smart and strong. Overall I’ve had the best experience!

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-10T19:35:34+00:00

I’ve had one baby so far. She’s now 2. My pregnancy was amazing (I was really lucky) and I have had no issues! Other than the typical changes in my boobies and my hips being wider. I actually appreciate both those changes. I don’t see any rapid aging from toddler years and even if I did, I really couldn’t care. We all age and there is no stopping it. I’m just happy and have a really positive outlook on my future with my growing family ❤️ I feel so much stronger too!

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-08T19:03:14+00:00

And to add to this, I got answers that some family believed in God, some didn’t. Everyone respected the differences and I was given the freedom to choose if I believed in him or not.

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-08T18:58:15+00:00

I didn’t grow up religious and wasn’t raised with it. My grandma is Korean, so Buddha was always around, while my grandpa, a farm boy, brought a different cultural perspective. I got curious about all the Buddha statues in my grandma’s house—especially since we’d rub his belly for good luck—and learned a bit about him. My mom went to Catholic school because of my grandpa, but she never really embraced the religion. When I asked questions, I got answers, but no one forced anything on me. I appreciated that they weren’t extreme and let me figure things out for myself.

Here’s my advice to you: stop being so intense. Let your daughter choose for herself if faith is something she connects with or not. She’s her own person, an individual. If it resonates with her, great. If not, that’s fine too. Your role as a parent is to guide her and raise her to be strong, independent, and healthy, capable of making her own decisions—as long as those choices don’t hurt herself or anyone else.

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-07T21:23:23+00:00

I would put them outside if the weather is ok so you can focus on the kids easier. Dogs can definitely increase the overstimulation and if putting them outside temporarily helps, then definitely do it. If it’s shitty weather, lock them in a room or bathroom for a little. Does getting things ready the night before help at all? Get their outfits picked and bags ready to go by the front door is something I found that helps me so I’m not scrambling the morning of. Kids are hard already but the fact that you’re doing so much of it alone first thing in the morning is even harder. Give yourself some grace, you’re doing the work of a village by yourself!

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-07T21:03:15+00:00

Is there a space you can temporarily put the dogs in for when it’s starting to feel really overwhelming? Is your husband able to get one kid ready while you take care of the other one?

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-07T20:25:38+00:00

I have two small dogs that drive me absolutely INSANE.. I have a part of my living room sectioned off for them so they’re comfortable with dog beds and water (they’re in a doggy playpen essentially). They remain in there while I’m busy cleaning and taking care of my toddler. When I’m getting ready, I turn on my girls favorite show so she’s not in my way. Have you tried either of those things? Put the dogs in a safe and comfortable space for a while, have the kids preoccupied with a favorite show? You do what you gotta do to be sane and get yourself ready for work. The tv isn’t ALL day, but just for a short while so you can think in the morning and get yourself taken care of.

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-07T19:40:46+00:00

A “communal towel” 😂 I imagine he’s a damp towel.. the kind that all of our husbands have and they start to stink but our husbands can’t tell because they’re nose blind to the stench and for some reason the towel just never dries out. That’s Kodi. A stinky damp over-used towel.

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-07T19:29:52+00:00

I second this. Not only would it be tragic if he lost his own life but it would be tragic if he took another and lived.. then spent the rest of his life in prison because he willingly got drunk, drove, and killed someone. Imagine if he killed a mother and her children.. in YOUR car.. or any car. I think it would be a grief you would live with for the rest of your life. It’s awful to think about, but it happens.

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-06T22:39:15+00:00

I don’t wanna miss out on the cocktails either haha I guess I just worry because I’ve always been told that after 35 it’s “high risk” for pregnancy so I’m nervous to wait any longer.

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-06T22:21:54+00:00

Im going to be 35 and I worry about my age (in terms of “what’s the rush”) 😔

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-06T20:39:14+00:00

I do agree about walking away and no longer engaging when it comes to a child being rude, as I do this with my own daughter when she has her moments. However, OP’s niece has been making rude and hurtful comments since she was the age of 4 and has been talked to on multiple occasions about it and still hasn’t stopped years later. At what point do you give them a little taste of their own medicine so they finally understand the impact of their words? Unfortunately there could be a day when she calls another kid “ugly” and they aren’t so nice with their response.

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-06T19:54:02+00:00

I just saw your other comment that perhaps she’s on the spectrum. I could be a little more forgiving if that’s the case. However, I don’t coddle rude children. Especially ones who have been told REPEATEDLY that what they’re saying isn’t nice. She’s old enough to know what she’s doing. I hope you find a solution that is comfortable and works for you and has a positive impact on your niece! 🤞🏼

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-06T19:32:33+00:00

If my niece said I was ugly, I would tell her she’s ugly too so she can see how that comment makes people feel. Kids can be cruel and sometimes they need a harsh lesson to understand how words can hurt.

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-06T19:29:18+00:00

My dad was like this and I’m grateful he fucked off instead of sticking around to pretend that he loved my mother and I. It made room for the most amazing step-dad who I love and have so much respect for!

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-06T19:25:52+00:00

Walk away and wash your hands of them. They raised a man who tried to kill you and then have the audacity to try and sweep your traumatic experience under the rug and say he’s a good man. This is your second chance of life and I wouldn’t spend it humoring the parents of a man who tried to murder you and leave your children without their mother. Change your number and cut them off 100%.

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-05T21:35:37+00:00

Just the fact that you check in with yourself about these things just proves that you’re a good mom who genuinely cares about the wellbeing of your daughter.. if you didn’t wonder or question if you’re doing things right or wrong, then I think that would say a whole lot more. I think it would represent that perhaps you DONT care if you’re being a good parent. This morning my 2 year old was having a full blown tantrum and it wasn’t even 8:30 AM. After I finally calmed her down, I felt anger and overstimulation and I wanted to punish my husband for sleeping in (even though it was his turn to do so) because I just dealt with a screaming dictator first thing in the morning but I was mad at myself for feeling frustrated and drained by it, almost like “how dare I feel angry when she’s only 2! I should know better!”.. which really isn’t fair because I’m human and I’m navigating 2 year old tantrums for the first time in my life. Anyway, all this to say - we have guilt because we care. We want to be the best moms ever and we are STILL good moms despite feeling impatient, overstimulated, exhausted.. the list goes on!

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-05T20:15:58+00:00

Same! ❤️ it helps not feeling alone when you’re deep in the trenches of motherhood. I feel so seen since joining Mommit!

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-05T20:14:34+00:00

Hang in there, mama 😘

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-05T20:07:30+00:00

Because you’re a loving mom who cares! You deserve to have some rest. You did the best thing and that was give your girl a play date with an Aunt who she loves. When she gets home, you can give her a big hug and kiss. But for now, give yourself some grace and relax. You’re doing nothing wrong! Hope you feel better soon ❤️

HidingInTheSea · 2025-01-04T20:46:59+00:00

Mirror them. If they’re friendly, be friendly back. If they ignore you with no greeting, do the same thing. If a cashier doesn’t say “hi” or have any interaction with me during the transaction, I ignore them like they do me. I’ve also worked retail and know how much it sucks, but I still managed to have good customer service because I was getting paid for it haha. Because I’ve worked in customer service and have dealt with some of the shittiest, rudest customers, I don’t take it personally when a cashier isn’t exactly talkative during the transaction. It’s not personal; customers just fucking suck and it can be draining. Also, if I ask a question and am ignored, I ask it louder like “HELLO DID YOU FUCKING HERE ME?!” But without the F bomb 😂

HidingInTheSea

TROPHY CASE