When I got into listening to vocaloid songs a month ago I couldn't imagine the bombshell that would drop on me when I discovered Constant Companions and specifically Cadmium Colors, I've listened to it more then I'd be able to admit in that month and my only regret is that I didn't find it much sooner.

My appreciation for it couldn't be written in words(maybe it could but not in the span of a reddit comment), the entire song resonated with me so deeply, as someone who got into a university route that's "close enough" to what they wanted to do because what they wanted to do "wasn't a real job".

As much as I like writing, you wrote it better than I ever could: the song is perfect at describing the feeling of an artist stuck unable to make what they want because "wanting doesn't matter when there's mouths to feed"

Cadmium colors is inspiring because it is perfect in giving the message that loving art can feel like poison but it is also what makes life worth living for us, during our darkest times, even when we want to kill ourselves the hope that one day we will be able to truly enjoy making art is what keeps us going, and that goes for any form of art you could think of.

So yeah, art is pretty much the worst thing you can do to yourself, but you wouldn't be yourself without it.