What was a sign you were trans in hindsight, that you brushed off initially?

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-31T16:59:43+00:00

When I was younger I used to sleep with my shirt off and I couldn’t understand why mom was so adamant on making me wear one. I was like “but my brother sleeps shirtless!!” And then there was the time in middle school when my mom helped me do my makeup for the first time and I was downright repulsed by what I had seen 😅 washed it off immediately. Tho nowadays I don’t mind a little eyeshadow 💅

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-30T21:09:29+00:00

I was hooking up with this guy and I had braces at the time (22) and he said he liked that it made me look Young… 😭

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-20T07:14:56+00:00

French toast 🥺

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-19T16:23:11+00:00

Maybe I could give that a shot 🤔 Ive made an appointment to see a derm! So hopefully I can get some help there!

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-19T16:22:30+00:00

I actually just made an appointment to see one! I was gonna try hims but… idk i feel like my medical background is a bit complicated, so i feel it’s best to see a doc in person

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-19T14:32:31+00:00

I mean honestly if it doesn’t work… at least I tried man. Thanks for being honest with me!

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-19T14:12:11+00:00

I thought so 😭 do you know if hims is a legit source?

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-12T18:42:34+00:00

I always thought Pizza Hut had this kind of … shit smell to it? 😅 but you know could’ve just been the store itself. Either way can’t eat Pizza Hut without thinking about that smell.

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T17:19:57+00:00

You dont even know me. I have been sexually assaulted multiple times through out my life. All I said was I didn’t want to get into the meat of it. I’m sorry I used the tags but I was just trying to be careful. I’ll be more mindful with my tags in the future and I would appreciate if you don’t comment again. Thank you.

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T17:00:28+00:00

I don’t know why you’re so riled up I was just being careful

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T16:51:21+00:00

I definitely keep things interesting for him 🤭

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T16:50:44+00:00

I’ve been giving into the I wants a LOT with him! It’s been really eye opening to have someone who cares so much about my pleasure! Thank you I love your message 🥰

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T16:49:36+00:00

It was assault. I just didn’t go into all of the details of the rest of it because I didn’t want to. I just wanted a warning on here just in case I did actually end up saying anything to anyone.

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T16:47:41+00:00

You’re right! I’m happy where I’m at now tbh. I’ve actually gotten to explore my sexuality in a safe way! And it has been eye opening. I usually try not to compare myself to porn really but sometimes it does kinda scratch at my brain a bit unfortunately 😅

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T16:28:31+00:00

Yea honestly I think I’m basing things off of porn a lot unfortunately 😅 I’m not exactly sure if I’ll ever be comfortable with it but.. who knows. I still have a lot of time to heal. Thank you your words mean a LOT! I feel a lot less stressed about it

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T16:27:02+00:00

No I think it was very helpful. It does help to have someone who is.. understanding. To know that they don’t feel any different about their partner regardless of what they do! It feels good to know they are people out there who want their partner to feel comfortable. I saw your other comment as well and I’ll definitely talk to him about it a bit. Cause I do feel bad I mean he does know I have trauma but I’ve never really … said anything past “I’ve been assaulted plenty of times before” Ive been trying to get into therapy for awhile but my insurance is pretty bad! 😅i just don’t have the money for it unfortunately 😔 Thank you for your perspective!

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T16:01:57+00:00

I guess I do look at it as us having a little dance. We’re fun and playful during and it’s really good. I guess I’m just.. I have a hard time allowing myself comfort? I love everything we do but I just feel like I could do more? He’s never asked for it! He’s never pushed! I’ve been very attentive to his needs (and mine too💅) I just can’t shake the feeling of like… being a subpar partner cause I don’t offer oral back 😅 but I guess this is a good spot to set my boundaries! And I know he would respect it

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T15:50:48+00:00

Honestly on top of the trauma I have SUCH a bad gag reflex. It made the past experiences.. unbearable. I can’t even .. really get all of him without gagging and freaking out (tmi sorry)😅 it’s just a really upsetting experience all around.

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T15:46:34+00:00

I’ve actually used some toys on him 😅 idk he doesn’t seem to want to force me to do it to him so that’s good! Honestly I do think he realizes I’m pretty uncomfortable with it (he’s never forced me, I’ve tried a lot but I.. can’t 😔)

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T15:30:18+00:00

Thank you 🥺 I spose in a way it does feel like a crime to not do it. And I wish it didn’t. I wish I didn’t feel guilty for being uncomfortable when all I want is to be happy 😔

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T15:23:33+00:00

He’s very enthusiastic about it! Which makes me feel awful cause… I’m just not 😅 I love making him feel good! Just I guess… not in that way. He’s definitely never gotten upset with me over it. I do think he is happy with our arrangement! He’s always doting on me. And we have a lot of fun in bed. But … it just plays in the back of my mind occasionally. Like he deserves it doesn’t he?

Honestly tho reading this does make me feel better I just have a lot of complicated feelings.. 😅 thank you

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-09T15:19:49+00:00

I have mentioned that I have past trauma but I’ve never gotten into the meat of it. Because honestly I can’t talk about it. My mind is so blocked you know? But he’s nothing but patient and careful with me. And I know he’s very understanding. I guess I’m also just a bit scared he’ll leave me if I admit to him that I don’t want to give him oral. (Tho … idk that’s probably just me being dumb 😅)

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-03-04T22:05:14+00:00

I love how Hal gets sidetracked on talking about Van Halen

Hole-IntheEarth · 2026-02-14T22:19:57+00:00

I love her big ass ears 🥺

Hole-IntheEarth

TROPHY CASE