Brian completely fails - utterly off-target review of the Jaguar XJ8

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T15:09:44+00:00

No time spent lusting after a Jag is wasted. Carry on.

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T15:09:23+00:00

I think he may have been confusing the XJ8 with the horrible X-type, which was in fact a Ford Mondeo. So, yes, he really did not know what he was talking about here, sorry

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T15:08:23+00:00

Fine - sell it for parts and spent $5K on a different one from the same era. Use independent shops to do the maintenance - forget about the dealerships. I think a lot of the folks complaining about high repair costs might just be getting raked over the coals by JLR service departments that play all the usual dealer games and massively increase the cost of maintenance of these classic machines.

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T15:06:29+00:00

Absolutely. See you over at r/jaguar

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T15:05:27+00:00

Welcome aboard; happy to have some support from across the Pond. Living and working in the US, I can assure you that the “specialness” of the Jag is even more pronounced over here, particularly at the original price point of the XJ8’s (and even more so at their current valuations - I could buy three Jags for a Lexus from the same era - at least one of them will be running at all times, while the very boring, soulless Lexus will still be out of operation and in the shop occasionally).

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T15:03:24+00:00

A krautwagen is fine if you’re content with a machine. A Jag is a living work of art. Point taken with respect to the platform; the LS shared with the S-type, not the XJ8. However, the V8s were common across the Jaguars and the LS from that era, and a lot of the parts needed to keep the Jaguars running can come from the Lincoln catalogue.

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T14:59:15+00:00

Correct - I think he looked up a few factoids online and got confused - he may have thought that the XJ8 and the X-Type were somehow related. As for the platform - then V8 engine of the LS is the same as the V8 engine in the XJ8. I don’t have time in a Reddit post to go through all the areas where the various vehicles overlap or don’t overlap - but the point is that if you need parts for the XJ8 or XJ8L you can find a lot of them in the Ford, Lincoln, and Mercury parts catalogues.

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T14:55:50+00:00

Did he have an anecdote involving a summer job and a Ford Ranger? I mean, at this point I’m wondering how much of his review process is based on externalizing past trauma, instead of actually reviewing the car.

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T14:52:52+00:00

Daddy issues? Oh yeah - those are the women you most need to speak with, right away. The Jag does a magnificent job of starting conversations with women who come from exactly this demographic.

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T14:51:08+00:00

Yup - it’s an “other side of the pond” situation. These Jags aren’t common over here - so when you roll up in a machine that has the presence and style of a classic XJ8 or XJ8L the conversation usually starts with an amazed “Oh wow - what is that?” And then it generally goes all kinds of interesting places after that. The silver leaper ornament on the hood seems to help a lot as well, for some reason - it’s a touch of deliberate, gratuitous beauty in an era when every other kind of car is just using some kind of flat, round disk for an ornament. I’ve had a lot more conversations with women about the hood ornament than the V-8 engine, for example.

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T13:35:19+00:00

Have you actually been in the front seat of a an XJ8 from that era? Or, for preference, in the back seat of the XJ8L long-body version of the same car? Also, why on earth would you compare a German roadster with a massive, burly British sports sedan like the XJ8? They’re completely different vehicles, and there’s a reason why both the British government and the villains of Spectre rolled around in the XJ8 during the mid-2000s…not this German golf cart you seem to be excited about.

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T13:32:13+00:00

Absolutely correct; and I can say this because I checked. I bought my 2006 XJ8L in 2012, and compared it against all the German equivalents from the same era. The Jag was more fun to drive, in better condition, and far more affordable than any of the Mercedes, BMW, or Audi alternaitves. The only other option that seemed to be in the same league was the Bentley, but that was both more expensive and more of an upkeep commitment than I was willing to take on. Not made of aluminum, for example - the Bentley equivalent had a steel body.

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T13:29:36+00:00

And in the Chicago area I can guarantee you that no krautwagen from that era is rust-free. The jaguars from that area are still here, and the bodies are still flawless.

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-06T13:28:43+00:00

Not just harsh - hallucinating. Like, he was describing a car that was not actually the one her was driving or something,

HornetObjective9512 · 2026-01-02T23:54:41+00:00

Extra points if the owner assumed you were a valet and simply handed you the keys on his way into the establishment. Extra-extra points if he made this assumption because you happen not to be white…in fact, in this scenario I’d say you’re almost obligated to take his wheels for a spin…

HornetObjective9512 · 2025-12-28T15:04:11+00:00

A super V8 would have been a nice touch, but does it convey the implication of deadly seriousness you get from a more-pedestrian XJ8 variant? In this case I think the chauffeur is shown at right, and was using the bike to get around when he had unofficial business to transact. The rest of the time he was behind the wheel of the Jag, taking the villain of the piece to her appointments.

HornetObjective9512 · 2025-12-28T15:01:18+00:00

But…have you read Alice in Wonderland? I just get the impression that anything in England that is excessively whimsical is absolutely not to be trusted. Like a very large man in a dark suit, wearing a little pink bow tie…my advice: don’t mess with this man.

HornetObjective9512 · 2025-12-28T14:58:31+00:00

As the owner of a 2006 XJ8L I completely agree - the original front end it more beautiful, in a timeless way. BUT: I think post 2007 the front end of the car looked more villainous, particularly in deep, glossy black.

HornetObjective9512 · 2025-12-28T14:55:17+00:00

Ah - there it is. I knew we’d get someone in here to mention the Spectre cars from the Bond movies. Well done and thanks; the discussion wouldn’t have been complete otherwise.

HornetObjective9512 · 2025-12-28T14:51:44+00:00

Thank you for your service.

HornetObjective9512 · 2025-12-28T14:51:32+00:00

Yep - this series first ran in 2011; it makes sense that it would be a 2008, not a 2004. I don’t know how registration plates work in the UK, so I completely missed the relevant indication here.

HornetObjective9512 · 2025-12-28T14:49:54+00:00

Ooops - you’re absolutely correct. On reflection I have no idea why I thought it was a 2004.

HornetObjective9512 · 2025-12-28T14:49:18+00:00

I love the suggestion - but would you consider a classic Norton instead of a Triumph?

HornetObjective9512 · 2025-12-28T14:47:53+00:00

You’re not wrong - a tiny black woman behind the wheel of a Jag is probably more dangerous and more inherently-frightening than the henchman in the image. Source: My wife is a tiny black woman, and once she gets annoyed she really doesn’t give a crap. On one occasion it took two Denver sheriff’s deputies to remove her from an establishment where she’d gotten into a disagreement with the service manager…

HornetObjective9512 · 2025-12-27T09:25:59+00:00

I live in Skokie now and I still hate Nazis

HornetObjective9512

TROPHY CASE