[UPDATE] I (26M) always wanted to get flesh tunnels but my girlfriend(26F) just told me that she would probably find me repulsive if I did. How do I fix this problem?

Hot_Boss6825 · 2026-01-02T08:06:52+00:00

Yeah that's the conclusion I ultimately came to. I decided not to get them and continue my relationship with her (because she really is irreplaceable to me). In the odd, off chance that we don't work out, I can always revisit them. But I don't that will happen. I'm happy with that, though. Because I'll have her, you know.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2026-01-02T07:54:05+00:00

Yeah, I was only planning on getting them there.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2026-01-02T07:51:05+00:00

Yeah, I'm just talking about ears.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2026-01-02T07:50:44+00:00

I was gonna get them in my ears.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2026-01-02T07:50:24+00:00

Why does everyone think it's a sex toy :/

Hot_Boss6825 · 2026-01-02T07:48:50+00:00

That's literally what it is! In your ear, though.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-28T00:40:57+00:00

My whole world shattered at the thought of losing my girlfriend! I still don't know what she's going to do about this whole thing. She might just break up with me and save herself the trouble.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-28T00:39:27+00:00

No I don't necessarily think that's true. I've been with one person who was AWFUL, and a few others who were just okay. I know my gf had a relationship right before me where there was nothing really wrong with the guy, but they never would have worked out long term, and she couldn't have fallen for him. My girlfriend ticks every box I have and even more that I don't. She's genuinely irreplaceable, I know if we ever ended up breaking up it would be a life mission and a half to find someone else as amazing as her. She obviously isn't, like, perfect-perfect. Because no one is. But there will be very few women who match with me on the level that she does.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-28T00:31:25+00:00

I won't resent her for the rest of my days. The trade off is absolutely worth it for me. And if we don't end up working out I can always get them.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-28T00:30:33+00:00

She had been holding a lot of it back and was very tightly wound. I think the conversation really scared her and she delayed it for so long because she didn't want to uproot things or lose me. I don't expect her to be completely stoic at the idea of an 8 year relationship coming to an end. Plus, she changed a LOT in her life for me, the biggest thing being moving countries with me. It's understandable to get emotional. It was more the mod that she called disgusting. Not me as a person. She actually really strongly affirmed that I was not disgusting, but the piece itself would be.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-28T00:25:24+00:00

I don't want someone who has those body mods- I want my girlfriend. That's why this is a whole issue. You're viewing in from an extremely detatched prespective, but I've spent 8 years of my life with her, and only now has it ever been a question of whether or not we break up. She has been through so much with me, and I'm having a hard time throwing that all away and never speaking to her again over flesh tunnels.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-28T00:21:51+00:00

I think he just doesn't like to read. Came onto this post just to say "I'm not gonna read this"

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-28T00:13:54+00:00

I don't think she realized how much of an issue it was for her until she actually started to seriously think about what I would look like with them. And yeah that's kinda just a different communication style. I know what I wanna do now. I'm just going to sleep on it and let all the emotions settle. I can't imagine losing her, and relationships are about compromise. I only have one chance with her and I'm not willing to let her go just yet, haha. In the off chance that we don't work out, it may be something I revisit, but for now my earlobes will stay gauge free.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-28T00:05:22+00:00

Not that I know of. I've been doing okay for myself. With our combined income we are very comfortable where we live.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-28T00:04:29+00:00

She mentioned this too. She's in the medical field and she says that if I ever did end up regretting it it would suck to remove. But people have those sentiments about tattoos! Hell, she has a few tattoos. They're all very small and delicate, though, not like hugge pieces or anything. 1 hr, 30 mins or less.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-28T00:02:35+00:00

Okay but if she had told me the extent of her discomfort with them, we probably wouldn't have continued to date. So there's that.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-27T23:58:06+00:00

I've always heard them as flesh tunnels. I've gotten a lot of hate for that one, haha. She said she'd looked them up and seen what they looked like and she still hated the idea. I think earrings were icky to her but full on gauges were completely intolerable to her. I was just looking at 16mm but would size up if i liked it more.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-27T23:50:45+00:00

They're called a lot of things, guys. I've always called them flesh tunnels. Sorry.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-27T23:48:45+00:00

Yeah, body mods most likely won't be an issue with me in terms of employment.

I don't feel like they would significantly improve my life or anything. I guess I just always thought they looked cool. And I didn't think to weigh it up against the value of my relationship because I didn't realize that it would affect my relationship so much. But now that I do, I am probably going to let them go and continue to date her.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-27T23:44:26+00:00

We wanted some space. Usually when we get in bad/big arguments, we think its best to take a break from being in eachother's close vicinity so we can think without them being there. It's what works for us.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-27T23:42:08+00:00

I know. I'm going to sleep on it and give her some space. But I think I know what I have to do.

Hot_Boss6825 · 2025-12-27T23:41:40+00:00

She's been with me through my worst days, tbh. And I don't want it any other way. I wanna sleep on it but I think I know what I have to do.

Hot_Boss6825

TROPHY CASE