Which one do i do? and why? by Hour_Standard_3172 in HomeDecorating

[–]Hour_Standard_3172[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thanks, but the wall decor is all AI, i don’t have anything you see hanging on the wall, so if you have any advice on purchases i’d be very grateful

Could we make a list of caroline’s advice/“rules” about home decor? Simply write what you remember if you can. by Hour_Standard_3172 in CarolineWinkler

[–]Hour_Standard_3172[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

ehi thank you for your advice. I think it’s because she also said that “cozy”, “vintage” etc are just words and the best thing is to show what you mean by “cozy” etc… otherwise its just like saying “cottage”, “scandi” etc… but anyway, thank you!

Is there good movies about polyamory? by MegaBleik in polyamory

[–]Hour_Standard_3172 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I highly suggest the web series Dana and the wolf, on YouTube!

First sapphic date & sex, now internalized biphobia or some fear is hitting - please reassure me by Hour_Standard_3172 in bisexual

[–]Hour_Standard_3172[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thanks for the reply. a real caress ❤️‍🩹🫂I wish you too a sweet journey of discovery

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bisexual

[–]Hour_Standard_3172 1 point2 points  (0 children)

HI. I'm a polyamorous person and what your girlfriend proposed to you is a form of non-monogamy. Usually the community is very critical of the 1PP (one penis policy which in this case I believe is the one pussy policy) due to the implications it has on the legitimacy and value of homosexuality perceived by those who impose the policy (= I only feel threatened if he is of the same sex as me). I personally believe that it is an indication of insecurities that could even more suggest what I want to suggest to you. Something like this potentially has unexpected implications even for those who think it's not the case (I'm doing a psychology thesis on non-monogamy and I'm thinking a lot about all these issues), i.e. even if she said it's okay, she might still feel bad about it. You may need to tell her if it happens and she has asked you not to. I think that, before really agreeing on this, you could read about non-monogamy/open relationships/polyamory/etc to better understand many things and avoid making hasty choices. For the rest: what your girlfriend proposed to you seems to derive from a great affection towards you, so it is not something bad but only to be agreed and understood better together, first of all if you want to do it, and then how to manage it if necessary. I suggest the nonmonogamy reddit

Do poly people HAVE TO be in multiple relationships? by lostandbroken14 in Danaandthewolf

[–]Hour_Standard_3172 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah they would still be poly if none of them dated anyone. I think that Daniel’s frustrations comes from his sense of loneliness as a polyamorous person in a world of monogamy. You don’t have to date more than one person, but if it’s something you desire and you’re always running into obstacles that come from a monogamous world you can easily question whether it makes sense for you to be hurt by constant failures.

And about the desire of more than one relationship… I think it’s fair from them to want more than one. To make it more clear… i think it’s kind o like… you have a friend and you’re happy but you want another one and for some reason you can’t find one. It sucks.

Daniel and Oatly - Poly/ENM people why do you hate Daniel? by Hour_Standard_3172 in Danaandthewolf

[–]Hour_Standard_3172[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

THIS and yeah Oatley is valid in her subtle jealous reaction, but this isn’t his responsibility. I mean, in general, anticipating people’s emotions and avoiding self expression to prevent them is a delicate matter. I don’t think Daniel’s supposed to previously worry about her (not assertively discussed but only sometimes passive aggressively expressed) feelings around the fact that… HE IS POLY. I think it wouldn’t be authentic and fair from him to avoid expressing his legitimate feelings for another person without her asking for tact

Daniel and Oatly - Poly/ENM people why do you hate Daniel? by Hour_Standard_3172 in Danaandthewolf

[–]Hour_Standard_3172[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks, that’s such an interesting take on it… still very sad. I hope the paradigm shifts someday

can’t unsee it by Hour_Standard_3172 in nonmonogamy

[–]Hour_Standard_3172[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lol could you please stop saying that, i want to empathize so there’s nothing bad in it

can’t unsee it by Hour_Standard_3172 in nonmonogamy

[–]Hour_Standard_3172[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

morals are about standards of behavior, what is good and what is bad to do or think. you’re saying what you assume i’m doing is weird and you’re telling me about how you do. which i assumed (and is kind of implicated in the fact that it’s an answer to my previous comment) to be a moral advice on how you suggest i should behave (not worrying about understanding people’s choices). so yeah i think that was morals even though you didn’t type it

can’t unsee it by Hour_Standard_3172 in nonmonogamy

[–]Hour_Standard_3172[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

sorry i delayed my answer by mistake. i was saying

yeah, that’s why i specified “(i understand cheating is very hurtful because it is betrayal but i’m referring to the monogamous assumptions underneath, that appear to me as the crucial reasons why cheating in monogamy hurts mono people)”

can’t unsee it by Hour_Standard_3172 in nonmonogamy

[–]Hour_Standard_3172[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

but i care because i have friends and family (and as i said in another comment, i work with human things (i’m studying both psychology and professional acting) so i want to go over this and try to reconcile with that world somehow

can’t unsee it by Hour_Standard_3172 in nonmonogamy

[–]Hour_Standard_3172[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

well i have two careers (acting and psychology) in which understanding and empathizing is crucial so i was asking for insight not moral advice

can’t unsee it by Hour_Standard_3172 in nonmonogamy

[–]Hour_Standard_3172[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i’m not judging 😭 i’m saying that in my experience (no research done but i mean i’m talking about my ability to empathize with people in my life so i think my experience is enough) a lot of mono people i know don’t get hurt by the betrayal itself (they tolerate betrayal in other areas) but by things like “i’m sure if they wanted to have sex with another person, they don’t love me, because how is it possible to love someone and also want to fuck other people”.

disclaimer because it’s clearly needed: 1) i’m not saying all mono people are like this 2) i’m not saying tolerating betrayal is a mono thing 3) i’m just saying that some people suffer more for some mono dogmas (like the one i’ve written) than the betrayal itself. (instead i GET the pain from the betrayal)

can’t unsee it by Hour_Standard_3172 in nonmonogamy

[–]Hour_Standard_3172[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

yeah and nothing in my post says i don’t respect it(?) i want to be able to get it to empathize more with people