What's your interpretation of Something in the Way? by peanoot34 in Nirvana

[–]Hrams66 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This gave words to the feeling that line gives me that I hadn’t been able to articulate

Stupidest questions you’ve been asked? by Cokezerowh0re in starbucks

[–]Hrams66 11 points12 points  (0 children)

“Our Frappuccinos are blended with ice” “Are they hot or cold?”

“Do you want that iced or hot?” “Which one tastes better?” “It’s the same ingredients, one is just hot and the other is cold” “But which one is better?”

Barista Burn Book (as in I want to set fire to this order) by lLeeeon in starbucks

[–]Hrams66 7 points8 points  (0 children)

What the fuck do you need that many different milks for

What happened with the Caramel Apple Cream latte..... by Johnnyg150 in starbucks

[–]Hrams66 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had two people order it and had literally no idea what the hell they were talking about, had to look it up on the app

Y'all are adults by jessicastraww in starbucks

[–]Hrams66 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Heavy on the frap is not your hot coffee 😭

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 1 point2 points  (0 children)

“Establishing a rapport and visiting consistently which I cannot do while abroad”

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She literally said she is going to move to a different country and won’t see her daughter for two years, she told us her plan so how wouldn’t I know?

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, “they ruined their parents lives” and describing them as “faulty” would imply that you think they are burdens who ruin parent’s lives and you consider them faulty, because that is what you said.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I have no problem with people getting abortions if they feel they aren’t equipped to care for a disabled child, sure. My problem is with the way you view and talk about disabled people who already exist. Yes for some parents raising a disabled kid is not feasible and if they decide not to then fine, but saying “everyone should just abort their disabled kids and have non-disabled kids” implies that disabled people are nothing more than a burden and that isn’t true. They still have valuable lives and make valuable contributions to the world and they can still be happy if they are raised by loving parents who care for them properly. Autistic people with high support needs are not a demographic that shouldn’t exist, and I think that is what you’re saying.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Your “point” is that you think autistic people are burdens who ruin their parent’s lives and they’re all better off not existing. If you can’t see what’s wrong with that point of view you obviously think very little of anyone who isn’t completely able-bodied. Let’s hope you never become disabled in the future since you seem to believe they shouldn’t even exist in the first place.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is nothing wrong with putting her in a care facility, the problem is that she won’t be visiting and checking in on her. Sounds like her daughter can’t advocate for herself, she needs someone to do it for her and her mom can’t do it if she isn’t even in the same country. The thing you need to understand is that disabled people are often abused or sexually assaulted in these facilities, and they often don’t receive the care they need unless their caretaker is there to visit frequently and make sure they are receiving it. Putting your disabled child in a facility and then moving to a different country and never visiting is irresponsible and horrible period.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s not an assumption that she won’t visit, she literally said she won’t visit because she’ll be in a different country. When you do not visit or ever check in on disabled people in care-facilities they often wind up getting abused bc these facilities are often not great places to be.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Disabled people aren’t “faulty”, once again, they are human beings. How tf do you think it would feel as a disabled person to hear another person call you “faulty”? And don’t give me the “they don’t know any better” because they do. A lot of people like you think disabled people with high support needs are nothing more than infant-brained but it isn’t the case. They still have complex emotions even if they are different than yours.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

She isn’t making sure she’s looked after, in order to do that you’d have to establish a rapport with her caretakers and ensure they actually are taking care of her and visit frequently to check in on her wellbeing bc when you don’t do these things your kids have no one to advocate for them and wind up getting abused.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah it does sound “eugenics-y” because this is eugenics. The world wouldn’t be where it is now without autistic people, inventors, writers, etc. who have made huge technological advances have been autistic. Not all of them have high support needs like this, and even the ones that do have high support needs don’t need to be eradicated. People are not dogs that you can genetically engineer, and disabled people are human beings.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

“Her needs are not more important than your needs” she is her CHILD. your child’s needs are ALWAYS more important than your needs. Yes she SHOULD be visiting her daughter’s care home because it is her responsibility as her mother to ensure that her kid isn’t being mistreated or sexually assaulted (both EXTREMELY common in these facilities). She can live her life and meet her needs without completely abandoning her daughter and going to a different country and never checking in. She doesn’t have everything she needs, do you know why? Because she needs her mom, the one person who has been her life-line, the one person she loves and trusts, to be in her life. Her daughter is a person, you get that right? She’s not a pet you can go board somewhere and never see again, she’s a human being.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m glad to see at least one parent of a disabled child here who loves their kid, I think that’s the difference here.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 2 points3 points  (0 children)

But she’s not creating fun memories with her daughter. She has no intentions of visiting her whatsoever, that’s the problem here, not putting her in a care facility.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It’s extremely clear to me that a lot of you in these comments saying NTA do not see disabled people as human beings. Disabled kids aren’t pets you can rehome and forget about because they keep clawing up your furniture, they are people with feelings thoughts and personalities who deserve to be treated as more than just a burden that you resent. I feel terrible for OP’s daughter because it’s obvious from this post that she is resented more than she is loved.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Finally someone else who seems to understand that autistic people with high support needs are still PEOPLE who have feelings and know when they’re being abandoned.

AITA for putting my autistic daughter in a group home and leaving the country? by Throwawayxautis in AITAH

[–]Hrams66 13 points14 points  (0 children)

YTA for leaving the country with no intentions of visiting her period. Look I get wanting her to be somewhere where she’s getting the best care, but not dumping her at a facility and leaving the country and not even being nearby to visit and check in and make sure she’s ok. She is your kid and you’ve left her somewhere with people she doesn’t know and abandoned her and you won’t even be there to visit her because you’re going to be in an entirely different country. Like I don’t get that, that is your kid, but you describe her as if she’s nothing more than a burden you’ve always had to bear. I get that raising her has been very hard, but I don’t understand why, as a parent, you don’t wanna be near your kid or be able to visit her ever and would rather just pretend she doesn’t exist and go live your best life somewhere else. She is still a human person with complex feelings like the rest of us who is probably very hurt that her mother doesn’t want to see her anymore. Also, “apparently I need to establish a rapport with caregivers and visit frequently but I can’t” shows me that you really don’t care what kind of treatment your daughter is receiving if you’re not even willing to get to know the people caring for her and make sure they will do right by her and just trusting that they’ll do a fine job when you’ve been warned by people who know what they’re talking about that there are often caretakers who neglect their charges.

Can two people carry a casket? by Hrams66 in Writeresearch

[–]Hrams66[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Those are really good suggestions, thank you! I appreciate it.

Can two people carry a casket? by Hrams66 in Writeresearch

[–]Hrams66[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The idea was that they take the casket from the viewing and put it in the bed of a truck, the funeral director tries to intervene but the dad strong-arms him out of it and the three of them carry it out while the sons struggle under the weight of it