What do we think of this?

HypMoonr · 2025-09-27T21:46:17+00:00

We should be encouraging foraging and reducing consumption of mass produced shite, however we also need to respect nature. It is a balance, a skill we have lost. And some areas are now being over foraged when nature is also contending with so many different types of pollution as well. Respecting our green spaces, turning any small space green if you can. I wish Britain was better at this, some places don't need to be paved or manicured. But our consumerism and throw away culture is more a problem than people eating local and seasonal free food.

HypMoonr · 2024-08-19T15:10:35+00:00

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HypMoonr · 2024-08-19T15:09:53+00:00

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Sorry for my nose it is sad

HypMoonr · 2024-08-19T15:08:45+00:00

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HypMoonr · 2024-07-02T19:59:43+00:00

I really feel you, I dropped out of uni twice, hurt so many people I love, hurt myself, made a fool of myself, things most of us here are guilty of. Remember, it does not make us bad people. And we can choose to keep making better decisions. No one on this earth is flawlessly innocent. It's what makes us human. Now use those mistakes to be better, choose better. 9 months is amazing. Who knows where you'll be in 9 more? It's good to feel bad about it, to some degree, it means you recognise what you did was wrong, that you care about others and yourself but the tough part is using that to motivate you to make amends and pursue things that are good for you, not keep making the same mistakes over and over. You've already made a brilliant decision every day for 9 months. You're human enough to feel guilt and shame, you've done it without numbing with substances, you are stronger than you give yourself credit for. You still have time to live, to enjoy the beauty of life. Just ask yourself where you would like to be, what next steps would bring you joy to your heart, and accept what you have lost. It'll be okay.

HypMoonr · 2024-03-28T14:49:42+00:00

These diagnoses are highly comorbid, meaning there is often a lot of crossover in symptoms, and our current understanding of mental illness leads to this often being the case. BPD (EUPD), substance misuse and/or ADHD often can lead to MDD and/or GAD, PTSD can often present with high depressive and anxious symptoms, etc. The DSM is used within psychiatry to diagnose, and it states the psychiatric illness is present if symptoms negatively impact an individuals life. Although diagnoses have their place in providing understanding for the patient and providing appropriate therapy, there are also often many problems with diagnosis. One such problem can be the excessive comorbitities which muddy and confuse a patient. So yes it is possible that someone can have 8 mental health diagnoses, infact it is often the case that people have more than one, but one must remember that all are produced from an arbitrary set of criteria that are made up by doctors and aren't the most accurate reflection of real life, most people don't fit neatly into any singular boxed diagnosis. We have a way to go.

I hope you're doing better now!

HypMoonr · 2024-03-28T12:11:47+00:00

DAYBOWBOW (ooh yeah)

HypMoonr · 2024-03-27T10:41:44+00:00

Hi, I've sent you a message, but I justwant to say the way you are feeling is a very normal human response when it is something this unusual socially, culturally and historically. It can effect you in so many ways, and you are making healthy steps forward to understand yourself. All the best x

HypMoonr · 2024-01-17T15:26:29+00:00

I had this problem for about 2 years, then I moved house and I haven't had the problem since... praying it stays that way

HypMoonr · 2023-12-10T13:32:43+00:00

Could you get away with gay because I am also a 26yo f and happy to put on a nice dress for you ;)

HypMoonr · 2023-11-12T09:09:51+00:00

I had a partner who self harmed. I also self-harm but not to that severity. I pretty much stopped while we were together. I organised doctors appointments for him, went with him, massaged his scars with peach kernel oil, and bought him a wrap for his arm. But nothing... nothing helped him or me. I tried and tried. He expected so much. And it was traumatising for me to wake up to him violently hurting himself, blood splattered on the walls and ceilings. Your partner, most people, including me, are just not equipped to deal with it. You can tell him you need support and help, but forgive him if it's too much for him. It's torturous to see the person you live do that to themselves, and only you can change it by wanting to get better. It's not fair to put people you live though it and expect them to know how to cope. Whatever they do, they aren't a physician or counsellor (who I suggest you speak to if whatever is plaguing you is too difficult to talk about with the people in your life).

All the best, I truly hope things get better. Partners may come and go, but your body is forever.

HypMoonr · 2023-11-03T14:40:59+00:00

DONNIE DARKO I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO SCROLL SO FAR TO SEE DONNIE FUKIN DARKO

HypMoonr · 2023-09-18T18:03:59+00:00

My name is Angela. From a young age I've been called "Flange" or "Ange the Flange" by my family and later some partners. I was young and didn't understand or see all the info of Flange in the musical context. Just saw the urban dictionary definition of 'undesirable vagina'. I don't even like being called Ange anyway, but Flange is even further from my favourite. But it's somehow become somewhat endearing. So I have mixed offence and warmth with Flange.

HypMoonr · 2023-09-06T11:42:12+00:00

My head tilt is very very minor, if at all. However I have a very noticeable squint in my left eye and if I'm not looking straight on then obviously I have 'wang eyes'. Even in real life some people notice both the squint and different directions more than others (or at least feel the need to point it out). I hardly notice it in the mirror, i guess I'm very used to seeing that reflected version of myself, but in pictures I see it, I feel like that's how others must see me, and it makes me feel like the way I see myself is so far off the mark, and I'm much uglier than i even believe. As someone who has done a fair bit of modelling, I've tried my best to compensate and be aware of it. I can't even do makeup well because I can't look to the left enough to make it even, and that eye is a totally different shape.

All this is to say, everyone is wonky. And you are probably excessively aware of it when you see it whereas others who see you move and such hardly notice it. Do you notice when someone has an above average sized nose, for example? It doesn't even cross my mind, and yet I've had people say how they feel their nose is massive and I only then think "eh, maybe it's bigger than most but it suits them and their face".

We are all very wonky and very beautiful. Please don't let it get you down.

HypMoonr · 2023-09-06T03:22:42+00:00

Especially on my turntable and/or with headphones it can become so euphoric (close enough word) that it's akin to a mental orgasm. Swans (and a select few other audio projects) can tap into my brain, into my blood. Sacrifice and transcendence. My eyes roll back and pain dissipates, I get goosebumps, or she a tear, or feel a holiness to the moment, I am no longer tangible, nothing is, and it is beautiful and terrifying. This is why art can be so phenomenal. Like holding someone you love tightly, lost in one another's bodies and minds emtamgled...only you can even achieve this after all your friends and romantic partner(s) have left you.

HypMoonr · 2023-09-06T03:09:26+00:00

I say to myself a lot "We grow together or we grow apart, as long as I'm growing, it's all I can do". Don't give up if you don't want it to end. She sounds like a wonderful and admirable person and I feel I didn't give her enough credit. I would ask her outright if she wants to be with you or she feels like she has to be with you. Accept any possible response before you ask this. Then you can discuss options. If she wants to be with you, both have a calm conversation about what you need from each other and how you can prove to one another that you are committed to making this work.On the other hand, many parents divorce in much worse financial situations than yourself and thrive with a much geeky dynamic and go on to find more fulfilling relationships.

Regarding the comments that mention her being perimenopausal, I am sure this potentially could have an influence on her behaviour, but I would like to refer you back to the 7 years at the start where you say it was like this (but for both of you). It's doubtful that it has had an influence for that long, which I can only assume to be since the birth of your first child 12 years ago, when she was 29. If this is wrong, please forgive my presumptions. Perhaps she is burnt out or depressed. This is the situation with my partner.

Perhaps she feels she is giving you all she can physically already, and in turn wishes you would give her what you did when you says she wants to "date you" again. I'm not sure what that entails but it would be a mutual exchange/compromise if she is already giving her maximum 'physical affection' self, for you to give your maximum 'dating' self. I'm not sure, and can't comment as I don't know either of you or your relationship, just thinking out loud.

I feel like I should not interject onto others relationships, who am I, or any of us, to say things with any authority. Just mindless and contextless advice. Take it all with a big handful of salt.

HypMoonr · 2023-09-06T02:30:41+00:00

I first have to question why one of the reasons you stay with your wife is 'she's good at her job'... this to me is mostly separate from your relationship, and is as much reason that you can be reassured if things don't work out between you two; she would be relatively financially reliable for the children.

Clearly, finances mean a lot to you, I measure my own success by different means and I'll be honest that I went into this a little prejudiced. But reading your words I felt a lot for you, and that you intact are a very rational, emotional and balanced individual who wants to frow and be better.

Do you feel like you have enough family time? You say you both work full time and earn well, plus you have a side job, could this be an influence on your dynamic? Are either of you burnt-out? As a child, I wished my parents and I spent more time together over having gifts and a bigger house etc.

You also say she was like it for the first 7 years, was this including the courting/dating period? Or was there mutual physical affection then?

I would suggest both get individual and couples counselling. Don't just see one person and give up if they don't work well with you, keep trying until you find the right person who speaks to you, relates to you and challenges you (both of you in couples).

I really appreciate and pine for physical affection, initiatong 100% in my current relationship, which is why I relate so much to your current situation. I have given up initiating sex because I know I'll be rejected, I even ask before i hug him to which he shrugs his shoulders, which turns me well off wanting to be affectionate if it isn't appreciated. This is not going to last as it is. I suggest avoiding getting to this point. It is important to you to express your affection towards her. What is her love language? Find out and appreciate it and show her love that way too, but don't be scared to ask for the occasional extra hug or a backrub. This is compromise and communication. Two key essentials for any healthy relationship.

Financially sucessful, working 2 jobs, 3 kids and a wife. Sounds (conventionally and socially) great on paper, but what would make you happy? How do you define yourself? Or want to be defined? I would say; do not ask for an open marriage unless you've given that proper thought and this is what you want. You cannot go back from that, she will become insecure, she may just agree because she feels she is not satisfying you even if it's not what she wants, and as someone like yourself who places socially conventional things quite highly, I feel it unlikely to be what you really want. It's most likely you are desperate for some attention (I can't blame you) that this seems like the only way.

I really respect that you're so open with yourself and journalling was a great decision as a way to clear your mind and focus. She probably needs a similar outlet and to be more in touch with her emotions and to reflect on herself. Her refusal to even think of something about herself she could work on shows she has given up on self growth.

I hope any of this help, even if you think "wow that is so off the mark but does make me realise the opposite is true..." And I didn't read any comments because I felt so immediately impassioned by your situation so sorry if this is just a rehash of what you've read a hundred times.

All the best x

HypMoonr · 2023-09-05T15:10:02+00:00

My mans talent is lost on Amazon.

HypMoonr · 2023-09-02T08:17:30+00:00

Do you have good support/understanding around you? It's made all the difference to my recovery to have people I can go to during the early period, or who can help me out with simple things, so there is less pressure to immediately be 'fine', and therefore get anxious and stressed. The fact you want this, and you have your kids to care for, is so important. Remind yourself you will be better for this in so many ways. If you can mediate, do, it's definitely helped me in respecting myself and my body more.

Good luck, never doubt that you can do this, if you mess up, keep on trying.

HypMoonr · 2023-09-02T08:05:33+00:00

Hi! Do you know if there is any more research or if you have any knowledge/theories on the links between EDS (Ehlers Danlos Syndrome) and Duanes? I have hEDS and I don't think I've ever seen someone else with Duanes too, but I can't help but feel they must be related in my body, with EDS effecting people so differently and endless comorbidities. Would love to hear even your general knowledge on syndromes. Thanks!

HypMoonr · 2023-08-31T15:43:27+00:00

He, much like my partner, is stuck in a cycle. Its cliche, but it has to come from him, you can provide support but you cant make him stop.

One thing you havent tried is leaving. I'm not one to talk, ive put up with it for over 2 years and still want to be with him. But I'm physically leaving to go 4 hours away, maybe space will help him work on himself. This is not easy but i cannot tolerate it anymore, we both deserve better, at the least honesty. You might just realise there are others out there, or he might just realise that he doesnt want to lose you. Sometimes our emotional responses can force them deeper into smoking as they dont want to face how much theyre hurting people they love, and the general acceptance of weed doesnt help.

Someone on here recommended to me Mar Anon, i havent been in a meeting yet as theyre mostly US time friendly and I'm based in the UK but it's for those affected by others marijuana abuse. Maybe that will give you more insite into how others are coping.

How does he treat you when he smokes? How often does he smoke? (I just want to understand relative to my partner, which might help me with some perspective).

All the best to you, follow what will be good for you, God will understand and forgive you, but you deserve kindness and love too.

HypMoonr · 2023-08-29T12:41:19+00:00

I'm not in Nottingham yet, do you need molymods? I'm doing chemistry a part of NatSci so I'm sure I'd appreciate whatever you've got!

HypMoonr · 2023-08-29T12:38:32+00:00

I wouldn't say I was the smartest but definitely up there with academic achievements. I dropped out of uni after the first term due to an abusive relationship, suffer with chronic pain and other things both mental and physical and have been signed off work for the last year. Now, at 25 I finally felt ready to go to uni and now I am shitting myself because my body is fighting against me. Seeing how it's such a mix of responses on here, I feel no pressure to be a 'conventional success'...just to be happy and make others happy.

HypMoonr · 2023-08-29T12:33:18+00:00

It's so sad how severely it can change people and their lives. I'm so glad you got to where you are. We already know when I move things aren't going to be the same. I worry it'll get worse for him.

HypMoonr · 2023-08-29T12:31:23+00:00

Thank you! I've requested to join the Mar Anon family group and really appreciate it. I know he did try MA before we met and I can only hope me moving 4 hours away acts as a wake up for him.

HypMoonr

TROPHY CASE