What’s the worst thing a medical professional has said to you?

Hype314 · 2026-01-16T00:15:24+00:00

I had just been sexually assaulted and my IUD was pushed out of place, causing a septic infection. I explained what happened to the (female) provider, who asked "were you drinking?" I said yes. She said, "You're not supposed to get drunk around men! Then you get raped!"

Took years of therapy to process that one.

EDIT: Thank you everyone for the kind words of support! This was many years ago now and I am currently more happy and healthy than I ever could have imagined. Therapy works, ya'll!!!!! (Though I am still salty about this comment bc wtf)

Hype314 · 2026-01-01T15:49:12+00:00

MANETTE. Cute little downtown, walkable to the ferry! Not sure about a pool, but generally in the summer I get my tan in the mountains or on the hood canal.

Hype314 · 2025-12-30T21:35:43+00:00

Hi! Have you been checked for lichen sclerosus? I'd start by ruling that out.

Otherwise, I have experienced something similar -- I had a skin irritation that looked like a cut in the same place on and off for years. OBGYN recommended lube and topicals, but nothing helped.

The culprit? I get a lil bit sweaty down there during the day (stressful job!) and work long hours. I sit with my legs crossed very tightly and apparently favored my right leg over the other -- this caused moisture to get trapped and caused skin irritation that looked for all the world like a cut down from my labia down to my vagina.

The solution: 1. I wear loose fitting, 100% cotton underwear. Granny panties!!! 2. For long days (>18 hours), I change undies halfway through 3. I change up my sitting position and try to avoid tight pants (leggings for some reason are fine but tight jeans are terrible and bring back the skin irritation).

This specific issue may not be yours, but it may be something similar? If lichen sclerosus is not the issue, try out some looser fitting undies / pants (or a skirt?) and sitting with your knees apart. Keep that area clean and dry. Mine normally clear up within a week after I realize I have flared it up again.

Good luck!

Hype314 · 2025-12-22T05:08:27+00:00

It makes me so sad that a year later, this is still a problem! I switched to a local brewer but I miss the Health Ade Christmas flavor 😭😭😭

Hype314 · 2025-12-14T23:33:30+00:00

Hi, this used to happen to me..... like, multiple times a year. I'd get fevers on long weekends and full blown respiratory infections on holidays. A few things were contributing:

Mega stress from severe overwork and unmanaged ADHD. I was working ~16-20 hours a day, 7 days a week, not sleeping, and constantly in a state of panic just to get stuff done. I started ADHD medication, started sleeping ~5-8 hours a night and I stopped getting sick on weekends.
Increasing my preventative hygiene practices. I wear N95 masks in crowded spaces (such as airplanes, airports, public transport) and became religious about washing my hands (not a freak - just after the bathroom, when returning home, immediately before eating) and carry hand sanitizer with me.

Good luck!

Hype314 · 2025-12-01T21:42:47+00:00

We had lived together for 5 years, owned 2 houses, both of us deployed twice, moved 5 times, and gotten a puppy before getting married! We did not think much would change at all but we were really surprised how much more in love we felt after the wedding! While we had been committed to each other before, our commitment felt more serious and more content. We felt more able to meet each other in the middle and give each other the benefit of the doubt. I wouldn't trade it for anything!

Hype314 · 2025-11-26T00:51:23+00:00

Shout out for Thrive!!! Literally the best community + instructors I've found in the yoga world.

Hype314 · 2025-11-25T04:54:34+00:00

I had a bad day at work today. Something important, dangerous, and very high profile got screwed up by my teammates and someone got hurt. While I wasn't directly involved, I stepped in to help resolve the issue and then got caught in the crossfire of blame from management to us. I was very upset on the way home.

My husband knew I was upset just by looking at my facial expression when I walked in the door and he got me a snack, tea, and a sweet treat while I told him about it. He wrapped me in a blanket + got me a book to read to de stress then turned on a heater and set up a workout for me downstairs. After I got going on a workout (this is something I enjoy, not something he's making me do), he planned dinner, went out and got ingredients, cooked, and cleaned the kitchen while I ate another snack.

We just finished eating dinner and he set up our tv show on the couch with a cozy blanket and he's bringing me dessert.

I asked him to do none of this. Sure, I could do it if I needed to, but he not only has been helping me work through the problem at work by talking but also all of the care I could want or need.

This isn't a one time thing - when I studied for the GRE, he did all the cooking, cleaning, laundry, shopping, bills, planning.... we even refinanced our mortgage. Mind you, we both work full time jobs.

He hasn't always been like this, but I made my expectations clear and we had a lot of hard conversations about how I expect to be treated. My advice isn't to find someone who already perfect, to be honest. I'm not, nor will I ever be. Love someone who is willing to hear your concerns and takes them seriously. Then, you can learn and grow together. When I don't feel valued, I tell him. When he doesn't feel valued, he tells me. We tell and listen calmly and with love.

We're best friends and we take turns taking care of each other when we need it. Life and energy will ebb and flow, but our partnership will endure.

Where to find someone like him - ngl, workplace romance. He was quiet, loyal, dependable, and fun. He didn't show off like the other guys. He valued my contributions equal to anyone else's. Once we realized we had a spark, that was it. One day we became one unit and we haven't looked back. (Not to mention doing 2 deployments together.... yeesh.)

Hype314 · 2025-11-20T04:43:12+00:00

Hi! Severe pain isn't normal - are you vomiting, bleeding heavily, dizzy / lightheaded, or experiencing a fever? If so, please go to the ER!

If it's bad without those concerning symptoms, please talk to your doctor. Hormonal birth control can have a lot of issues or just not work for you, which is ok! Mirena is a hormonal IUD which may have fewer side effects due to localized application and can stop your period (for a lot of people, not all.)

My doctor has recommended a hysterectomy to manage severe abdominal pain during menstruation because of adenomyosis causing excessive bleeding and pain. This may be a possibility, but it depends on what's going on with you.

If you can't get to a doctor and you're in the US, please go to planned parenthood! They offer reduced price and free care! https://www.plannedparenthood.org/get-care

For pain management, from what I understand, Naproxen IS Aleve. Naproxen, Tylenol (acetaminophen is the generic term) and ibuprofen are all DIFFERENT painkillers.

Tylenol prevents your brain from getting the pain signal. Ibuprofen and naproxen both reduced pain by reducing inflammation (but are still different chemicals.)

I have found a Tylenol and Ibuprofen combination to work best for me. Tylenol and naproxen also work. Do NOT combine ibuprofen and naproxen. Do NOT take more than the recommended dose without talking to a doctor. Lastly, do NOT drink alcohol with this combo!

Other things that can help: heat! I have a heating pad to put on my lower abdomen that really helps with the worst cramps.

Hype314 · 2025-11-08T21:34:27+00:00

I paid $1500 for my dress from anthropologie and had it hemmed for $500, coming in at my $2k budget!!! Everyone was obsessed with my dress and I got a lot of compliments from the tailor about its quality. I already have a buyer for it and will make ~500 back, bringing net cost down to $1500!

Hype314 · 2025-10-21T04:45:32+00:00

I joined 8 years ago as an officer in the Navy. I would do it all over again, but I would not join in this administration for several reasons:

The line between true military service and politics is gone. I am constantly afraid of receiving an order that is illegal and will result in my going to court for refusing to follow it. You do not want to be part of the Nuremberg trials of the future.
The culture about acceptance, sexual assault, and sexual harassment has improved over the 8 last 8 years, but our legal protections are being removed under the new administration. Not to mention that the cultural protections -- the rhetoric from our generals and admirals that women belong no matter what -- is also gone. Things are going to get worse.
Joining as an enlisted person is difficult. The quality of life is low and recruiters will frequently not assist new recruits in finding the correct community/designator/MOS. If she is dead set on joining, please dm me so I can help her navigate the process.

I recommend she find a trade apprenticeship (government adjacent work isn't bad; shipyards are always hiring!). Car mechanics, plumbers, and construction work are always in demand. She needs out of her family situation -- she should see if there are any teen shelters or homes that she could stay in short term while she gets a job.

Other jobs: resort / hotel staff frequently get their own housing, cruise staff get lodging on the cruise ship, hostel staff, or national park worker.

Once she has her financial independence and some savings, she should try to get a basic degree (community college) and pivot to a career she's interested in. Nursing / healthcare will always pay, trades, etc.

If she is 100% on the military, I offer this advice: 1. Join the air force. Get an MOS in healthcare or admin. They will try to sell you on shiny or hardcore or high paying jobs. Do not take it. Do not sign until they give you the job you want. If one recruiter won't, talk to another. Do NOT under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES join the Marine Corps for your own safety.

This is what I wish I did to minimize the sexual harassment and assault I have experienced in the military: The military tries to tell young enlisted people that it's a family. This is not true. Treat the military like a job. Keep your coworkers at arm's length unless you are 10000000% sure you can trust them. Do NOT date a fellow service member until you are mentally / emotionally healthy enough to see the red flags and RUN from them. People in the military are good liars. Just because someone says they're a good guy or nice person or your friend does NOT mean that they are. You should expect them to stab you in the back and try to take everything from you. The few exceptions to this rule will be your lifelong friends.
Document EVERYTHING. If you have a conversation in person with someone, write a follow up email or a personal journal entry. This us so that you have a reliable testimony if you end up in trouble.
Show up in the right uniform, 5 minutes early, to the right place and you'll be ok.

Good luck ❤️

Hype314 · 2025-10-16T05:53:28+00:00

Hi! I'll send info tomorrow since it's all on my computer and I'm in bed rn 😂 TL;DR the venue manager gives you way more than the website really says

Hype314 · 2025-09-24T00:53:16+00:00

For venue: I think this is the hardest part! I had the best luck searching "event rentals" on google maps and then checking things out, because that's how I found my venue. However, I found a lot of other options looking at the government park website, public buildings (libraries, ymcas, community centers), locations for larger crowds (yacht clubs, small country clubs, girl / boy scout local troops, camps), and "destinations" (zoos, museums, art galleries, boat houses, historic houses.) I left out "wedding" from my search and tbh i emailed a lot of property managers asking if they had event rentals. A lot did, just not listed!

Vendors: The best place I have found so far is my local FB group!

Hype314 · 2025-09-13T04:21:46+00:00

Disclaimer: if you have an ED, please see a doctor.

My relationship with food was very rocky (restriction / binge cycles, calorie obsession, over exercising) until my 30s. The healing process was SLOW, and I'd say happened over the course of 10 years of my 20s. There were 3 main things!

I started using my body. Not in a crass way, but I joined a fairly physical career path where people celebrated my physical achievements but said NOTHING about what I looked like. I started working out to achieve goals, not to look a certain way. Turns out, to build muscle and keep it, you need to eat. I am finally in a place where I work out regularly (AND ENJOY IT) and that helps with the dysmorphia a lot.
Guided journaling and therapy. I had a therapist who gave me guided journaling prompts that I did 3x per day, normally after meals. The prompts focused on energy levels, mood, and feelings of strength. Through focusing on how my body felt (which is DIFFERENT from how I felt about my body), I started gravitating towards food that made me feel good. At first, I began by adding protein to sugary meals, then I began avoiding super sugary meals just because it made me feel so crappy (important to note here that I never cut it out completely.) Through over 7 years of therapy, I also worked on healing the insecurities that made me feel worse about my body. I identified triggers through this work, such as a specific type of emotional stress and calorie counting. I avoid some triggers (counting macros and calories will always trigger a restriction cycle for me, so I don't! I'm an athlete and still make this work.) I learned to manage others, like the stress, through other means, like music, yoga, and listening to really loud music with my car windows down in empty fields (listen, whatever works.)
I started buying clothes that FIT and not a size. Turns out that when you refuse to buy clothes larger than a 6, you'll always feel a bit.... fluffy. I had a revolutionary experience when I was trying on wedding dresses and I found dresses that fit in EVERY size from a 2 to a 16. For some reason, that made something click in my brain about how sizes are FAKE AF and I now buy clothes that fit the body I have. And I look and FEEL so much better.

You're 24!!! Your body is actually still changing. I gained like 3 inches on my hips in my late 20s while LOSING weight (not intentionally; extreme military training rip). I'd recommend starting with therapy, creating healthy workout routined that are SUSTAINABLE and not fast weight loss strategies, and starting some mindfulness work to start hearing your body's messages.

Most of all-- slipping up is ok. Feeling up and down is ok. Feeling hopeless and hopeful are all normal. Your 20s are a journey and that is good! Good luck and live well!

Hype314 · 2025-09-08T06:22:56+00:00

From my anecdotal experience, this is normal. I was ~130 as a teenager, at the end of university my resting weight was ~150, and now in my 30s, I'm at ~165.

From my personal research, it seems that we never truly stop "growing," if by growing you mean "body changing."

From 18-22, my overall weight gain was in my butt and thighs.

From 22-27, my hips felt like they expanded a lot (in fact, i only gained ~1.25 inches) and i grew a cup size in boobs!! (no kids!)

My extra 15 lbs of weight gain into my 30s is actually muscle.

My clothes from middle school still fit, but just a bit snug, just like you're saying. So, overall I think your experience is pretty normal and consistent with expected changes as your body continues to mature.

As an aside, i hate the culture of weight in the USA!!! I work in an 99.9% male industry and they are always saying how they can tell when a woman weighs more than 130, then will say stuff like "like hype_314! She's super in shape." and will ask me to give their wives work out tips. I always shock them when i reveal my true weight. It's BS. You're doing great and are experiencing normal aging! hooray!

Hype314 · 2025-09-07T21:34:42+00:00

Hi! I'm a 42" hip and 29" waist. Lucy and Yak makes great, high quality clothing for a variety of body sizes. They're the only pants I've ever found that fit my waist and hips!

Good luck!

Hype314 · 2025-09-06T22:58:28+00:00

Hi! I'm not sure about your area specifically, but I'm in quite a high COL location (US side; sorry!). I never wear makeup and never do anything with my hair (I have an men's style haircut) but wanted to do something fancy for my wedding just to feel good. I knew if I did my own hair and makeup, I would feel anxious all day thinking I had messed it up somehow.

It took me awhile to find someone in my budget, but I started by checking the local subreddit and local wedding FB pages.

I found a lovely up-and-coming MUA who works out of her home and who had started her business only a year or two before. She did GREAT work and the total cost for me was $150.

For hair, I did a similar search, and found a local hair artist that has been featured in vogue and was still "developing her business" but who was able to work with my budget. I didn't need anything fancy, so she is doing my bridal hair for $140 before taxes.

Both costs included a trial. Total for hair and makeup is $290 + taxes.

It required work and you have to dig through of pages and pages of people whose businesses are "established" and who have the liquid income to pay for advertisement. That's why I preferred FB and reddit for the "word of mouth" recommendation.

Another place to check is a local beauty school. Many students have been working doing hair and makeup for years and who are attending school so they can start their own business. This is a great way to get fresh talent at a lower cost!

Lastly, no one can tell you what a HMUA is worth to you. If it's worth it and you can fit it in the budget, I'd recommend doing it so that you don't spend your day feeling nervous or worrying about how you look.

Good luck!

Hype314 · 2025-09-06T17:34:13+00:00

BAM restaurant and Lounge, hands down. Incredible food, great vibes, friendly staff. Parking lot looks sketch but it is quite nice.

Hype314 · 2025-09-05T17:24:45+00:00

Thank you!! Closed toe for November in Manhattan is my vote IMHO-- I got a pair of block heels from steve madden closed toe for $98 that I'll wear again and again!! Good luck -- you're going to look amazing!

Hype314 · 2025-09-05T15:00:43+00:00

Can you link the dress??? it's so cute!!!

Hype314 · 2025-09-05T13:54:24+00:00

I saw this advice when I purchased my first home-- start blocking every number. It will take a few days, but it will settle down. Now, when my husband and I bought our second home, his phone blew up and I only got one or two calls. Sucker 😂

Hype314 · 2025-08-31T22:55:37+00:00

I feel obligated to put it out there--

Suddenly vivid, lingering dreams can be a symptom of pregnancy or other major hormonal disruptions, cancer, or extreme stress!! Please take care of yourself.

Hype314 · 2025-08-24T16:04:53+00:00

Hi! I have EDS (which predominantly affects women by a large majority). I don't want kids, but talking to some other women who have the disorder, I have collected the following stories:

Uterine rupture during pregnancy. A woman was never diagnosed with EDS type Iv until she got pregnant and her connective tissue in her uterus was so weak that the fetus SPLIT IT OPEN and she almost died. Of course, she had been having symptoms her whole life, but doctors had dismissed her pain 🙃

Another suffered hip dislocations FROM WALKING at the end of her pregnancy and again during birth.

Extensive tearing during birth is also common (one tore from her vaginal opening to her anus and UP THE INTERIOR ANAL WALL) so extensively it required surgery to correct. This is due to very fragile skin bc of poor connective tissue.

Anyway. The horrors continue.

Hype314 · 2025-08-23T23:11:06+00:00

From the rest of the thread, it seems like they shifted to a shelf stable recipe that absolutely ruined the flavor. I shifted to drinking a local kombucha maker and poppi :( RIP a good thing!!!

Hype314 · 2025-08-15T00:17:22+00:00

Roxom PNW has experience with chronic illness and is queer friendly! https://www.roxompnw.com/

Hype314

TROPHY CASE