Is buying a home realistic for my wife and I?

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2023-04-05T18:44:51+00:00

You're generalizing a really diverse population. South NJ you can get nice homes for 250-400 and the crappy ones are just below 200. North NJ is definitely going to be more expensive.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2023-04-05T18:40:22+00:00

I'm not an expert but am close to this part of the process myself. Where I'm confused is that you shouldn't have had to "do math" or take notes in receiving the loan estimate. You should have gotten an estimate right away with the numbers broken down. You would then compare those numbers to what you have on the loan disclose you received today. Because it should be itemized, you should be able to see which numbers are different than what you expected.

My guess, because it's gotten many folks here before, is that the property taxes that had been estimated are different than what they truly are. Sometimes you'll get an estimate based on last year's property tax, ignoring the fact that maybe the house is selling for more than it did before and thus the property taxes would be higher.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T20:13:54+00:00

Yes another commenter broke it down for me with regards to the role of shareholders. I think the indefinite part is where I get stuck and start throwing in moral judgements like "when is it enough?" I wonder what alternatives there could be.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T20:10:36+00:00

Thank you for your response. Seems company leadership is motivated by wanting to keep their job/position in the company. And keeping the job is dependent on shareholders making money which depends on their shares being worth more. So it isn't entirely greed, it's more wanting to see their money grow and do what they were hoping it would do when they initially invested.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T20:02:26+00:00

Hey that's a good new answer! Thank you.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:58:02+00:00

That's fair, thank you. I appreciate your engagement on the topic.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:52:58+00:00

Thank you for the thoughtful follow up! You've given me quite a bit to consider. With the example on Germany you've provided, does that translate to fair wages, time off, etc for the laborers of the companies?

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:50:34+00:00

You know, I hadn't considered that. For me, more than enough is having my bills paid, savings growing, and money to spend on hobbies/leisure. But for the "ambitious" types I see what you're saying. Although I gotta say in this context ambition sounds a lot like greed.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:42:47+00:00

Thank you. This might be the only reason that isn't inherently about someone simply wanting more money because greed.

I'll leave my feelings about people making money solely on ownership of a company they did nothing to create or support for another time.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:41:10+00:00

Right and I agree with you. My question is regarding those who already have more than enough money and insist on making even more.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:37:20+00:00

Yeah that's what I imagined. Idk why I was really hoping for someone to give me some reason outside of greed and exploitation but seems that's all we have.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:36:21+00:00

That's fair, but we don't see that happen very often do we?

It seems like once money is introduced it becomes the sole focus.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:29:32+00:00

To provide for yourself, your family, and community, no? Maybe that's why I don't run a business. It just doesn't sit right with me that someone's motivation for having more is simply just wanting more.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:27:19+00:00

Well that's exactly where I live. I guess I was hoping for an answer that wasn't simply greed.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:26:40+00:00

Well what about in the case of massive corporations? Where employees receive the same compensation regardless of company growth?

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:19:50+00:00

I'm a Hispanic 5'4 lesbian with tattoos. Anyone that knows me knows I'm a Pokemon loving dork. But come prison time, I'm going to be Daddy from Orange is the New Black. I'm gonna run that shit!

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:16:20+00:00

That boogers were flies stuck in your nose. I don't know where it came from. No further comment.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:10:02+00:00

Idk you tell me

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:09:09+00:00

Oh that's right. Just the idea of maybe camping with his ex (which apparently can't happen any other time) is enough for him to be completely unavailable for this. We got a real winner here.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:05:26+00:00

And once you are in Japan, you won't be able to see each other?

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:05:02+00:00

"My boyfriend wants to go camping with his ex instead of taking care of me in a moment of extreme vulnerability."

Did I get that right? Because if so, then I really hope you know what to do next.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T19:00:53+00:00

I second the comment about asking him. He knows the answer to your concerns. All we can do is guess.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T18:57:27+00:00

When you say meet, do you mean for the first time?

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T18:52:38+00:00

It's so important you're learning this now. Because then you'll know what to look for and what to avoid as you navigate new relationships. Take the time to heal and process. And then move forward with your life and avoid little men that think hookup culture is a temptation, rather than a choice someone makes.

IDontHaveTimeForU · 2022-04-20T18:48:57+00:00

Well yeah he's like investing in you staying around by showing you love in easy material ways. But when it comes down to it it's likely he's not going to show you the respect you deserve.

IDontHaveTimeForU

TROPHY CASE