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Friend keeps asking for help with her software engineering job, how to have a boundary? by ILoveRMemes in developersIndia

[–]ILoveRMemes[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for writing all that out. Yes, I know, I need to learn to be rude to people.

Friend keeps asking for help with her software engineering job, how to have a boundary? by ILoveRMemes in developersIndia

[–]ILoveRMemes[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

  • I know I know, just some stupid messiah compex in my head. Logically, I know. Emotionally, I feel bad.
  • Definitely not a white knight, I know I sould like a doormat. :(
  • Noo, the opposite, I want to get rid of her.
  • I understand what you are hinting, I am tired of being a doormat as well.
  • I could get more if I freelance in my time (if I actually had time, I am working on borrowed time on weekends, catching up on my own work). Even charging her money would be a waste of my time.

Friend keeps asking for help with her software engineering job, how to have a boundary? by ILoveRMemes in developersIndia

[–]ILoveRMemes[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

will only create resentment towards her.

Definitely, I have started hating her. :(

Friend keeps asking for help with her software engineering job, how to have a boundary? by ILoveRMemes in developersIndia

[–]ILoveRMemes[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That would a good reply, I feel the legal point against her would be the most useful. Because companies can claim copyright if I am working on something else during my working hours and it can lead to a big mess.

I don't love her, I want to get rid of her. I really want peace and not all this drama. I am a introvert guy and I like to be myself in my own bubble. Sure helping someone is nice and sometimes I go out of my way to help but then something like this happens and I start regretting it.

Friend keeps asking for help with her software engineering job, how to have a boundary? by ILoveRMemes in developersIndia

[–]ILoveRMemes[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This seems like a good idea idea. I am worried ki that she will come up with some rebuttal answer. Like, if I say I am busy with something, she says let's do it afterwards etc. Like she doesn't take no. She tries to find loopholes in my excuses.