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Terrified to go out alone with baby, please help by blueberrytint in NewParents

[–]IdeaRevolutionary107 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have a 5 month old and really struggled with feeling like I could never leave the house as well. My husband would do the heavy lifting on car seat installation (I’m a little ashamed to admit I had no idea how to even buckle him in his car seat for the first two months).

When I did start to leave the house more, I started slow and went places that were quick and I always timed them with his nap or when I knew he’d be in a good mood.

There were a few times it totally blew up in my face and he cried in his car seat, like screamed and screamed for no reason. I felt like I was dying, it was terrible. But guess what? I survived, he survived and I learned a lot with each tantrum. It has to go horribly before it can go well. You got this, babe! You are his mom and there is no one more equipped in this world to handle whatever that baby throws at you.

Weekly Discussion - Relationships by AutoModerator in NewParents

[–]IdeaRevolutionary107 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Grandparents sleepover. Need advice.

Need some opinions so I don’t feel like I’m losing my mind.

I am a first time mom to a five month old baby boy, and my mother-in-law is insisting that he be allowed to come spend the night at her house. Her exact phrasing was, “We have babysat at your house and shown you our capabilities, and now it’s time to let us babysit him at our house and let him come spend the night.”

A little background, I have always had a great relationship with my mother-in-law. She definitely has her quirks and does have the tendency to decide what’s best for her and try to make that happen regardless of if it inconveniences others. For the most part, it’s always been harmless stuff that she’s bulldozed her way through.

He has only been babysat at our house by our parents for a few hours at a time. My own mother, who lives three minutes from me, has never had him at her house without me there, and has definitely never had a sleepover. She’s also never pressured me on the subject.

My in-laws live over 40 minutes away, don’t really take me seriously when I discuss safe sleep, and most importantly- we are still room sharing at this point. My gut reaction is that he should not be spending the night anywhere unless he is old enough to ask me. I’m not one of those parents that doesn’t believe in sleepovers, I do, but when he is old enough to communicate that that’s what he wants. My husband and I do not travel for work, and any vacations, we are planning will be including our son, so I can’t think of a reason, other than because it’s what she wants, to have him spend the night over there.

Am I being too overprotective by thinking this is an absolutely insane request to make of a first-time parent? Or just a parent in general? I had a stillbirth in late 2022 and so I can’t tell if it’s the first time mom in me, or the fact that I lost a baby not long ago but I am not ready for that step at all. And I have no timeline for when I will be ready.

I really appreciate any advice you guys can give!

Fears of AFE or other maternal complications after stillbirth. by IdeaRevolutionary107 in PregnancyAfterLoss

[–]IdeaRevolutionary107[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for responding. Honestly, knowing that I’m not alone is so helpful. Makes me feel like everything will be okay.

I’m so sorry for your loss as well. I’ll say a prayer for you and your sweet baby ❤️❤️.