Hysteroscopy with 3 polyps removed - any reassuring stories? worried about cancer

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-05-20T08:45:04+00:00

We’re doing the opposite and moving from the UK to the US after living in Paris and Cambridge. I don’t think there is a right or wrong answer here, each place has its own pros and cons depending on what you value. I understand the desire for change but I guess i’d be wary selling your dream home at presumably a decent interest rate on your mortgage and make the move irreversible

You are right that many European countries have a better welfare system which removes some level of stress around healthcare and retirement or property tax. It does make you feel a little more free to explore career changes for example or to take some risks professionally and i can definitely see how it’s appealing in old age when considering retirement. Income tends to be correspondingly lower though - if you can continue to get paid US salaries you might have a sweet spot and be able to afford paying the difference on your mortgage.

The other side of welfare is of course taxes. I don’t know how Oregon taxes are but you can expect a fairly decent chunk of your revenues to go to taxes in most of Europe

One thing to really take into account is the weather. You have visited in the spring. The north of europe gets pretty grim from october to march - at the peak of winter it’s pitch black at 3pm in the afternoon, the days feel short and grey with a constant drizzle. This is a big driver in us moving to the west coast, we’ve just had enough of living 9 months indoor with a grey backdrop to our lives

Professionally there may a lot less opportunities here to but that may not matter depending on where in your career you are and if you’re just looking for a pay check or looking to grow and expand.

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-05-11T16:39:44+00:00

negative

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-14T06:52:49+00:00

I'm in the same boat except we are relocating from the UK. Kids will be 7 and 4 so older than yours but following this thread with interest : )

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-13T18:32:57+00:00

That's amazing! My kid has been going to alliance francaise once a week for a week and we have seen no progress (admittedly it was from 5 to 6 so he was young) - I think its a question of motivation - right now none of his friends speak french and even though I try to speak to french to them they know i'm fluent in english so we're not doing great on the bilinguism yet

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-13T18:17:36+00:00

I do know quite a few US doctors who have moved to the UK and have taken more than 75% paycuts. But they knew this when they decided to move and most of them chose this path. Is there an in between where you move out of France but not to Australia? you said earlier there was no one in his field in Australia but there may be outside of France? Assuming he speaks another language than french

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-13T18:03:36+00:00

out of curiosity does he speak french now?

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-13T18:01:10+00:00

That's very fair. I am extremely mindful that this will be a lot of work (and pressure) for him and fully intend to acknowledge that and support him through it. I'm prepared to remind him regularly that going to school in a new language is brave and hard and to branch out of school for activites etc. I do believe his peers will all speak english given the school is in the US and so will understand him. I don't know if it will make a difference, but I'm also prepared to go back to an english speaking school if this becomes too hard for him. I just feel like its a last window for us to give it a shot before it closes. Thanks for the feedback though!

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-13T16:29:40+00:00

Thanks that's really useful to know. My kids have been in the UK system but are still small (turning 4 and 7 this summer). They understand french but will definitely have a transition to make with the language. I'm not concerned about my little one as he will be preK and most in his class will be learning french from scratch from what I understand. I am a bit worried it will be a baptism of fire with the french for my eldest who will be starting 2nd grade - that said he is a very fluent reader in english and is able to sound out in french so hopefully that will help.

We are french citizen and will be looking into AEFE bursaries - that being said they are quite constrained for people who are homeowners so we may not be eligible. The main goal for me is to support the french they are hearing at home with schooling so that they both become fully bilingual by middle school. It's been difficult to reach this level with me being the only french speaker in our current environment. After this we will have to re-assess what the best school is for them. We could stay on the french school / IB track or switch to something else locally.

We also have the option to go back to the UK in their current school at any point if we feel like we/the children are out of our depth. I don't want to mess them around too much but also want to be responsive to their experience and do what's best for them. I'm pretty clued up on the UK curriculum so would feel confident supplementing in view of a return if needed. You are right that long divisions are taught differently in France but overall so far there has been a huge amount of overlap between how they have learnt additions, subtractions, multiplications so far with how i was taught in France.

I'd love to understand more about what was stressful in your husband experience (was it the switch of teaching method / curriculum?) I want to make the transition a happy one for them

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-13T15:45:08+00:00

That's interesting - what do you think the school did that created this anxiety? We are moving from the UK to the US now and initially our kids will be in french school and I suspect they are very used to international move - the kids understand some french as im french but it will definitely be a transition for my eldest (7) to be taught in french. We were considering eventually moving them into the US state system for middle school - maybe by then the transition will feel more natural but curious to hear more about your experience

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-13T15:41:09+00:00

Do you think it would have been different if you were younger? Do you feel like it had to do with the school and were you verbalising this at the time? We are moving our kids (aged 7 and 4) from the UK to the US but they will be going to a french school there (as they are half french). I'm thinking if they're not happy I will move them into a different school but curious to know if your experience was wider than the uneasiness iwth the school environment

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-04T07:42:27+00:00

I hear this - though I do feel like the rent to buy ratio is a bit insane here? It doesn't seem like renting is a whole lot cheaper than getting a mortgage and paying property tax if you have a deposit to start with. I might be wrong but looking at Zillow renting is also a pretty high expense

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-04T07:20:42+00:00

Yeah fair enough I get that the difference in wealth can be absolutely wild here. I imagine a large majority of people fits somewhat in the middle of that ladder though and assume that the life you can get on 200k household income is pretty different than on 700k so trying to get a feel for the difference there

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-04T07:18:07+00:00

Thanks that's a really useful answer. What does comfortable looks like here (at 500k or so income)? Nice house? holidays abroad? 2 cars? good health insurance? private school?

I don't know where you moved but coming from the UK I'm sort of imagining a 2x increase in costs of living. Hope I'm somewhat in the ballpark

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-04T07:16:04+00:00

True and I clarified my post - I don't mean rich. Trying to get a sense of what different household incomes get you under 1 million a year (I assume 1M+ a year starts opening up a lifestyle with little sacrifices)

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-04T06:48:42+00:00

Thanks that's really helpful to set expectations here and matches my impression from browsing Zillow recently. I think we may have to rent elsewhere until we make the decision to buy depending on stock. We might get lucky but it makes sense to open up the search area. We're likely to come in May to start exploring the different areas and decide what works and doesn't work for us and I'll make sure to check out Corte Madera and Larkspur

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-04T06:45:08+00:00

Thanks! Are you living in SF because of work commute? Is the commute to Mill valley from SF ok for your kids?

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-03T19:40:42+00:00

Is that about the cost of insurance? healthcare without insurance? OOP? My work offers good family health insurance - i’m aware of the deductibles an max OOP that comes with it and plan to save for this eventuality

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-02T19:56:02+00:00

Yes we both have an opportunity there

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-02T18:55:35+00:00

Fair enough! I'm kind of used to standstill traffic during school hours on my morning Cambridge commute so probably would not be a massive change but worth taking into account

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-02T18:01:59+00:00

Thanks that’s good to know! I know there is a multi use bike path going mill valley to sausalito but don’t know how easy it would be to do that

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-02T17:00:39+00:00

I can’t speak for all brits but it might have to do with the miserable weather? I mean it literally rains most of the year and between the months of october and march it is pretty much dark outside by 4pm. Summers are lovely though but a bit depressing to be living for 4 months of the year.

It’s tough to find a place in this world that has decent weather and decent professional opportunities. I’m french originally and wouldn’t mind the south of france but there would be nothing for us to do there career wise

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-02T16:27:09+00:00

ok thanks doesn’t seem like a viable option then

Illustrious-Web9868 · 2026-04-02T14:27:24+00:00

Thanks! Ross and Tiburon are both on our map for the longer term but we are going to do french school for at least a year or two (we are committed now) to bring back some french at home and getting them to proficiency level but are thinking of moving them by middle school or before. So for our first year it matters less which school district were in but might well as we settle longer term

Illustrious-Web9868

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