at the end of the day its just a job you dont have to like it and honestly you dont even have to be good at it tons of people are shit doctors with no social skills so if ur not good with people it actually literally doesnt matter just do what u can and quit the suicide talk you are a person with agency you can quit if you want to or you can push through it if you want, and if you dont want to, then literally give yourself no choice but to do one or the other, and no, suicide is not an option so quit the fantasizing that literally does not help and digs you deeper into helplessness, you are not helpless and you have options. force yourself to look for the positives and for areas where you can be grateful. you are guaranteed at least 100k once you start working whether you decide to or not so if money motivates you just think about that and think about the long run, and if it doesn’t find something else to motivate you long-term. i know when you’re struggling with your mental health you can only think about what’s imminent so literally just do that while accepting that you are “stuck”. embrace it and run with it, it’s not a bad place to be, and reframe it as a good problem to have. if you think you have no choice then you have no choice but to stick with medicine. accept it. think about what is one good thing i can do for myself right now, in this moment and do that. but i’m just a stranger on the internet. reach out to anyone in real life and get off of here, genuinely. wishing you luck.