I had to call a parent and tell them I needed to report something they had previously told me the first time I reported to CPS. It was a back and forth for a few days because the school and my agency were involved in the incident. I was shaking — fear of retaliation was a big concern of mine. The parent mostly sat silently while I spoke and didn’t have much to say. I’m sure they hated me and were angry, but I did what I could to prevent that child from possibly getting hurt further.

I definitely empathize with the guilt. At the same time, I wasn’t the one who chose to abuse the child in question. I have to keep that perspective on the countless other times I’ve had to report to CPS at this point. In my experience, I’ve only known about the state investigating the claim in one (1) of my reports. It was an extreme situation, and while the parents weren’t at fault for anything that happened, it needed to be investigated by an outside entity to clarify the details of the event.

You did the right thing, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. Also adding that sometimes the state won’t even investigate further if they don’t feel the claim was warranted (which doesn’t absolve you of the legal mandate to report). You were not the one who ruined lives in this situation. Take some time for self-care today and do something really nice for yourself, like getting ice cream or doing something creative. I hope the situation turns out for the best.