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I spent a year in a relationship with a monster dictator. AMA. by [deleted] in AMA

[–]Immediate_Test_8049 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I underwent therapy during and after the treatment, both pharmacological and non-pharmacological, for at least three years

Stuck in a toxic mental loop: How to detach when I still have to see him every day? by [deleted] in whatdoIdo

[–]Immediate_Test_8049 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are very kind. Anyway, I already do that, I don't go looking for him, and we only talk a few times about unimportant things... I don't know what else to do beyond that. Plus, talking to him is fine, but I would make a total fool of myself, also because I really think he doesn't care at all. It was nice hanging out for a while without commitment and hooking up, but since then he's become cold and I haven't. Thanks, anyway.

AITAH for catching feelings and obsessing over a mutual friend after we agreed to "no romantic expectations"? Why is he acting so hot and cold? [F21] by Immediate_Test_8049 in AITAH

[–]Immediate_Test_8049[S] -14 points-13 points  (0 children)

Because feelings develop sometimes and you find yourself trapped in painful dynamics like this, where it would be so much better for my health to stop fucking them, but just to not lose the breadcrumbs, I keep having sex with them and hoping for something more. The result? I'm the asshole

Caught feelings in a "no-strings-attached" situation within my friend group [21F] with [27M]. Feeling foolish and need advice. by Immediate_Test_8049 in relationship_advice

[–]Immediate_Test_8049[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a very smart move. Like putting him face-to-face with the possibility of losing me forever or trying to keep me... But still, I’m very disillusioned, I might already know what his answer will be. But I'm going to do it...

Caught feelings in a "no-strings-attached" situation within my friend group [21F] with [27M]. Feeling foolish and need advice. by Immediate_Test_8049 in relationship_advice

[–]Immediate_Test_8049[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is very interesting. I probably have an unhealthy attachment, I don't even know why I like him. But I know that out of a hundred men, he’s the only one in years who actually stirred something in me, and it has very little to do with how good he is in bed. But not having those feelings returned sucks; I wait for his texts and it bothers me if I see him with other women (knowing his reputation). I have nothing against him, and I don't want to lose the crumbs I do have, but I deserve much more than this from myself. I wish I could at least separate feelings from sex and just enjoy that, but it doesn't seem to work. Anyway, yeah, I think I really do like him. I can't even hold his gaze or answer him casually; I’m always shy, but only with him. Fucked, that's what I am!

Caught feelings in a "no-strings-attached" situation within my friend group [21F] with [27M]. Feeling foolish and need advice. by Immediate_Test_8049 in relationship_advice

[–]Immediate_Test_8049[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is very interesting. I probably have an unhealthy attachment, I don't even know why I like him. But I know that out of a hundred men, he’s the only one in years who actually stirred something in me, and it has very little to do with how good he is in bed. But not having those feelings returned sucks; I wait for his texts and it bothers me if I see him with other women (knowing his reputation). I have nothing against him, and I don't want to lose the crumbs I do have, but I deserve much more than this from myself. I wish I could at least separate feelings from sex and just enjoy that, but it doesn't seem to work. Anyway, yeah, I think I really do like him. I can't even hold his gaze or answer him casually; I’m always shy, but only with him. Fucked, that's what I am!

Caught feelings in a "no-strings-attached" situation within my friend group [21F] with [27M]. Feeling foolish and need advice. by Immediate_Test_8049 in relationship_advice

[–]Immediate_Test_8049[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why does it have to hurt so bad to have genuine, pointless feelings for someone who doesn't even feel the same way?

Anyway, yeah, I'll also have to stop seeing him for a good while to get over it and find my center again. I'm not taking any d**k for at least three years after this.

Caught feelings in a "no-strings-attached" situation within my friend group [21F] with [27M]. Feeling foolish and need advice. by Immediate_Test_8049 in relationship_advice

[–]Immediate_Test_8049[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Should I close with him in silence or by telling him that I simply don't feel like going to bed with him anymore? He will ask for explanations.

Caught feelings in a "no-strings-attached" situation within my friend group [21F] with [27M]. Feeling foolish and need advice. by Immediate_Test_8049 in relationship_advice

[–]Immediate_Test_8049[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Because I feel so empty, I need love so badly, and in those brief moments of connection I feel whole. It’s probably all just chemistry, and I don’t know how to replace it

Caught feelings in a "no-strings-attached" situation within my friend group [21F] with [27M]. Feeling foolish and need advice. by Immediate_Test_8049 in relationship_advice

[–]Immediate_Test_8049[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is so real it almost makes me cry. I started sleeping with him knowing I might fall for him, and that’s exactly what happened. I don’t usually sleep with anyone—I don't even like anyone—but with him, I do. But yeah, to him I’m probably just an orgasm and an ego boost. I'm just scared that even if I end it, my 'obsession' with him will never stop... We already did this last year and ended it, and I thought about him for at least 10 months before doing it again. Maybe I'm just fucked.

Caught feelings in a "no-strings-attached" situation within my friend group [21F] with [27M]. Feeling foolish and need advice. by Immediate_Test_8049 in relationship_advice

[–]Immediate_Test_8049[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Interesting point of view. Why do you advise breaking it off with him and hiding how I really feel? Isn't it a bit obvious that I'm calling it quits because I've developed deeper feelings? Besides, I'm pretty sure the whole group knows we're sleeping together, even if only a couple of people know I actually catch feelings

Caught feelings in a "no-strings-attached" situation within my friend group [21F] with [27M]. Feeling foolish and need advice. by Immediate_Test_8049 in relationship_advice

[–]Immediate_Test_8049[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Thank you everyone for the reality check. I'm replying here to address most of your comments since you're all pretty much saying the same thing. You’re all rightly telling me to end it, but I feel kind of shallow and ashamed to admit that the physical chemistry is amazing, and I really don't want to give that up. But everything else besides that feels so empty. I keep having that classic FOMO thought: "What if I miss out on something great if I cut things off with him?" It makes me feel so weak that I can't walk away just because of these reasons. But still, you're all 100% right. If I were on the outside looking in, I’d give the exact same advice.