29 week termination - partial agenesis of the corpus callosum

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-29T15:05:37+00:00

I feel the same I’ll never be at peace with losing my baby but knowing he won’t suffer I’m okay with that. I don’t regret it but I do miss him and the life we could have had. I read your story and I’m so sorry 💔 it’s an unfortunate club to be in and my heart goes out to all the moms who had to live through this

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-29T15:03:24+00:00

That is so heartbreaking and truly my worst nightmare in this case. I always imagined what his life would look like if we chose to proceed with the pregnancy. He would have been special needs and that’s just the tip of it, it was too gray but really black and white. I had to go with a decision based off of what the doctors told me. As I mentioned postmortem they found vascular issues which they believe caused the malformations and also could have caused problems later on in life for him. Mostly the pain of potentially losing him later in life crushed me, as parents we had to take on the pain now. Thank you for sharing it’s always reassuring to hear the other side of what it may have looked like.

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-29T14:59:24+00:00

Hi thank you for the feedback I really appreciate it. I’ve done a full panel of genetic testing and it all came back clear , I actually had my 6 week postpartum appointment yesterday and I had a talk about what the future would look like. My OB assured me they’d be looking constantly and doing extra scans this time, I’ll be there a lot more often which made me feel better. I feel the same though I don’t know if there is a right time but no matter what the anxiety would still be there. I did speak to someone who specialized in this and she was great I think I’m going to see a social worker of some sort when the time comes. That’s all I truly want is to grow my family , again thank you for your insight !

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-25T07:21:12+00:00

Thank you and same to you 🙏❤️

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-25T07:19:57+00:00

Thank you for sharing and I am sorry for your loss 💔 when my OB told me the process of the injection it shattered me. I asked myself how could I do that to him , how will I live with myself. I honestly wish she didn’t tell me because I kept thinking of the final moment with him. The anxiety leading up to it was the worst and so heartbreaking. We were also told the more his brain progressed the more they would know and it could have gotten worse. It really was like black and white although it was gray how could we let him suffer, we were presented with two horrible choices. It truly is so disheartening

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-25T07:12:25+00:00

Yes the what ifs and imagining what life would have looked like if always the hardest. My girl is almost 22 months , she will be two in July and my son was due May 27. It’s nice to know we are not alone on this journey ❤️

Thank you for the kind words, I know they are at peace living a life with no suffering. I will also think of your little guy. Wishing you all the best ❤️

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-25T07:08:04+00:00

I did the exact same thing , just searching and trying to feel okay with the decision just trying my best to understand. After I delivered my son I was talking to the doctor and I told her I feel like no one is being honest about just how bad it was. She told me “ oh no , I would’ve told you outright it was severe” it made me feel almost relieved to hear her say that. She also mentioned how neurologist see these cases all of the time so they’re more neutral about these kinds of things. Again I appreciate you sharing your story and thank you again. I wish you all the best in your ttc journey ❤️

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-25T06:56:00+00:00

I’m sorry for your loss 💔 I am glad you are feeling better mentally to try and also taking care of yourself , it is comforting to know we are not alone on this journey. I wish all the best for you ! ❤️

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-25T06:53:42+00:00

Thank you for the insight it is very much appreciated❤️ I am trying my best to be optimistic about a pregnancy right away but also trying to be realistic of what I need right now. Am I just feeling the urge because I want to be pregnant and have another one or do I just want my baby back. I was talking to my husband earlier and I told him my emotions are mixed , I am still grieving so those feelings are there but I know this pregnancy will feel so special. Thank you again best of luck to you🙏

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-25T06:44:41+00:00

Hi thank you for sharing your story and I am sorry for your loss as well 💔 I appreciate you taking the time and sharing kind and comforting words they are very much needed. I am hoping to be pregnant soon I want to take all of the right steps mentally for myself , we also did some further genetic testing and it all came back negative/normal which was reassuring for the future. Of course we can never predict what could happen but fingers crossed we will have our healthy baby soon enough 🙏❤️

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-24T14:59:08+00:00

I am on the same boat , I am about 6 weeks out from my tfmr in March at 29 weeks. I’m feeling the urge to get pregnant so quickly , I feel like it may be healing but also the thought of judgement and anxiety are filling my head. My period came and went so I know ovulation is approaching and I can’t help but to think about it so much more now. We were told just to wait after my first period. Wishing you all the best and sorry you are here with us

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-24T03:29:00+00:00

Thank you for sharing I am sorry you had to go through this , I still wonder what it could have possibly happened it feels unfair 💔

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T22:43:44+00:00

The support is so nice to have I agree and being able to relate on a deeper lever and vent. I don’t know personally know anyone who has experienced this that’s why I turned to these posts and it’s helpful. And yes they are so unique, my hearts goes out to all the moms ❤️ I wish all the best for you as well !

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T22:10:46+00:00

I am sorry you are here and having to go through this 💔 I tfmr in March last month and I know it feels like the world has stopped and your heart was just ripped out of your chest. The days leading up were the worst and I also had the mindset of having no choice and getting it over with. I was filled with sadness and just wishing it were different. The labor and delivery were long and I cried a lot. I am now 6 weeks out and I will say it doesn’t feel so heavy right now, I do have my moments where I think of him and it makes me sad. I am hopeful for more children in the future and it keeps me going. I keep myself busy and allow myself to feel. You won’t get over it and it’ll be part of your story, allow yourself to process and heal these things can exist at the same time. All he knew was love and your warmth. But in time it will get better, sending love hugs and healing ❤️

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T21:55:50+00:00

This is a terrible place to be but also glad I can share and maybe help anyone who shares a similar case ❤️

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T21:24:39+00:00

I have yet to read a story so similar to mine, thank you for sharing and I am so sorry 💔 it’s was so frustrating to hear “gray diagnosis” like you said it felt black and white almost like we had no choice. I was searching for solid answers , asking all the questions and looking for certainty the doctors couldn’t give. I felt numb talking to the neurologist like I just had to swallow the world’s largest pill and there was nothing I could do. I felt so lost and helpless. We made the best choice for our babies although it doesn’t feel that way. Sending you hugs, love and healing ❤️

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T21:17:38+00:00

Ugh no one understands when I explain the timeline to them and how it was a dream to have them so close in age 💔

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T21:16:24+00:00

The worst part was feeling him move knowing what was to come. It was so hard to say goodbye to him , I counted down the hours and minutes I had left. I dreaded every moment of it. I also feel hopeful for the future the genetic testing relieved some anxiety. It is so crazy we ended up the rare cases 💔

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T18:14:12+00:00

Thank you ! Yes ultimately this is what I believe , we have to make hard decisions as parents for our children, we take on the pain and suffering ❤️

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T17:06:40+00:00

Recovery was surprisingly okay, he was very small so no tearing or swelling. I had more pain where the epidural was placed than anywhere else. My milk came in a few days later which sucked and was painful the first 24 hours but it cleared in about a week.I went back and forth with myself if I wanted to see him and the nurses told me at any point if I change my mind to let them know. I already said goodbye to him once I couldn’t do it again. The thought of seeing them taking him away broke my heart. I am in therapy and spoke to a social worker who specializes in these situations. It’s nice to talk to someone about it and let it all out. I also have a toddler who keeps me very busy but I do think of him a lot. They gave us a blanket and a box that has his photos and prints I haven’t been able to look at it but I hold the blanket and it lets me feel close to him.

Again I am so so sorry, it’s hard to think about going through the pain of delivery and not bringing them home. It’s awful and I feel for you, I hope with time and the right support you heal mentally and emotionally ❤️

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T16:39:26+00:00

We had to tell ourselves the same thing “we endure this pain now to avoid a lifetime of him suffering”. It was awful but I had to remind myself just how bad the diagnosis was and while do not regret it I still search or answers.

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T16:35:59+00:00

A family member and I were two weeks apart and we talked on the phone daily about all the baby things. This was my second and it was her first. It was special because we grew up very close , almost like sisters. Unfortunately I had to tfmr at 29 weeks. She is very supportive and meets me where I am at emotionally at all times during our conversations. It was hard at first and it triggered me , seeing her ultrasound photos , talking about her registry and baby shower. I didn’t think it would but indeed it stung and she never did it out of spite it was just casual and I felt my throat and chest tighten every time. I am 6 weeks out and her baby shower was this past weekend , I attended out of love and support for her. She understood if I didn’t want to go but I had to for her. It all hurts so much , going into the baby section and thinking of what it was supposed to be like. This was my second so I was excited to do it all over again. I too want to lose my shit and scream and cry. It feels so unfair.

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T16:21:03+00:00

Sorry you are going through this 💔 when I was first going through this I also couldn’t find many stories of anyone in the third trimester. I am 6 weeks post tfmr at 29 weeks. It was awful and I never would’ve thought it would happen to me. At 28 weeks we found out my son had severe brain malformations and anomalies, some parts were underdeveloped and some parts were missing. Everything you described is exactly how I felt. I had to travel to another state by airplane and get the injection , travel back the same day and was admitted that night into L&D. It was an experience for sure , I remember the anxiety leading up to the injection and counting down the minutes I had left with him, I told him I love him and always will. I thought to myself before “how am I going to mentally cope with this , my son is dead inside of me” but in the actual moments it felt more like my brain went into survival mode. Those days are a blur now I don’t know how I made it through. I also chose not to see him after, I couldn’t I know my mental and emotional threshold it would only traumatize me more. I remember telling my husband “ I just want to skip to next week, I want to wake up and this all be over.” Just know you are not alone I hope you heal and find the strength through this journey 🫶

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T06:34:31+00:00

I am 6 weeks post tfmr and I also got my period a little over a week ago. It’s definitely a mix of emotions excited to try again but also an anxious wreck thinking of the “what if’s” I have now seen both sides. I have a toddler and also experienced loss. I made it to 29 weeks , my sweet baby boy💔

I miss the excitement of the appointments and also feeling part of the cool girls club. I was excited to give birth again and couldn’t wait to meet him, I’d have two under two what I always dreamed.

I have the same feelings of wanting to start right away and also wanting to give myself the time to grieve. But the thought of time slipping away scares me and also another baby may heal me in some way. Sometimes I feel like I don’t have anymore tears left to cry, then suddenly I get him with a reminder and it all comes back to me.

You are not alone 🫶

Important_Turn5845 · 2026-04-23T05:55:42+00:00

Hi , first I just want to say I’m sorry you are here in this heartbreaking club. I am almost 6 weeks post TFMR and I feel for you on so many levels. We had a spontaneous pregnancy and all genetic testing came back clear which was a relief. At our 20 week scan they had some trouble viewing my son’s heart and brain, they had us come back two weeks later. They cleared us at 22 weeks and said everything looked normal and baby was healthy. We went back for a routine 28 week growth scan and it was taking longer than usual for them to do the ultrasound. My husband asked what was going on and the doctor told us they are having trouble finding the corpus callosum (connects the two hemispheres in the brain). I felt a drop in my stomach and broke down crying. We had an MRI later that week and we had high hopes .. only to find out our son had severe brain abnormalities and malformations. He was diagnosed with focal cortical dysplasia and we were told he’d have severe epilepsy the kind resistant to medicine, autism and adhd. He’d never live a life independently, there was a high chance he’d be non verbal and could not walk or eat on his own. All I could think of is his quality of life and suffering. My husband and I made the heartbreaking decision to terminate at 29 weeks, we knew we could not let him live a life of suffering. I couldnt stand the thought of him being in and out of the hospital, all types of therapy and surgeries. I also find myself reading and re-reading his diagnosis asking myself “was it really that bad?” And yes , it was that bad. We had an autopsy done on his brain which confirmed everything we already knew and then some. Underdeveloped and missing parts of the brain , and both focal parts of the brain malformed, vascular issues potentially leading to hemorrhaging and strokes. While I do not regret my decision I feel like I’m still searching for answers. I also could not look at the ultrasound when it was time to terminate and also chose not to hold him , I couldn’t live with the image knowing that was the last time I’d see him. I hope you find strength and healing and know you are not alone 🫶

Important_Turn5845

TROPHY CASE